I really wish this was a bound copy of a completed novel, because I can imagine curling up with it, covered in a blankie, getting utterly lost in the world you have created. The romance, the suspense, the heartache. Lovely.
Beth chewed her lip, casting a furtive glance around the newsroom. Shoving the photos back into a thick file, collecting jacket and bag, she grabbed Pete by the arm, steering him toward the elevator, "I'll tell you while you buy me lunch."
You wanna know why I quoted the above? Because look at how well you capture a scene. It's not all about the back and forth bantering, it's the
little things--the chewing of the lip, the glancing, the moving towards the lift (I did that for you!). That forms the visual that plays in the reader's head--picturing the story. It heightens the experience for the reader, and I just lose myself in the story.
Beth and Pete's conversation--enjoyed the comfortableness between the two of them. And just when I am liking that piece of it, I get slammed with a feeling of nervousness over Beth sharing so much with him. I am like her, torn, unsure how to feel. I completely relate to her reasons for doing what she did, but it still scares the hell out of me.
bittersweet remembrance.
Perfect. No need to explain any further, we understand it all with 2 words.
And Beth, like a dog with a bone!! She is beyond determined to help solve this and get back to her man. Who can blame her? They would both move heaven and earth for one another, but I don't want her to suffer for the risks she is taking--and that is my biggest fear.
Feeling like a barber-surgeon in an old movie
Love this reference!!! I am in love with your brain. There. It's all out in the open.
The entire scene with Mick and the good doctor--grisly and realistic. The poor man is hurting physically, mentally and emotionally. And I love that you showed Beth finally giving into tears after receiving Josef's text. She appears so strong and in control through most of this chapter, then we finally see the true heartache of hers push through.
The procedural elements are tight as a drum. Truly.
The fact that Beth and Josef don't need many words to communicate, and you mirror that in Beth's letter to Mick--that is the mark of an incredibly close relationship.
The ending, Good God, the ending. Both of them in bed, separate, but together in their grief.
Gorgeous.
. You were one of the very first to read the first chapter of this story and I love that you're still reading and enjoying. My particular gratitude for liking the barber-surgeon line! As for Beth, you're so right - for all her toughness, she's hurting too, she just copes a little better than Mick; but there are times when it all gets too much and she, too, breaks down 
.
well, maybe a little
.
