Changes Ch. 12 and 13. Rated PG-13.

[halfcent]

Disclaimer: I do not own Moonlight or anything Moonlight related and I make no money from writing it.



Mick

What did he do to me? I can feel it. The BOND. The difference is so drastic it deserves capital letters.
The BOND. It slides through my veins, swirls around in my heart, fills my head. It's in my blood. Literally. He tried to deny it. Tried to say I'd already been sired once, that he hadn't turned me, but re-turned me. That I'd eventually have turned back anyway. But I can feel it.
We've been friends for a long time, about fifty years. Best friends, if I may be so bold. I've always been aware of his age, as any vampire is aware of an Elder. And he is the Elder of the L.A. community, with all the accompanying power and responsibility. But now I can feel his power, a strength that I'd only suspected before, and his sense of responsibility, magnified a hundred times when it’s aimed at me. Responsibility and protectiveness.
But there's even more to it than what I feel from him. There are my feelings. Though I think it is best described as....instinct. Yes. Instinct seems right. Though I'm well aware of how I'm feeling, I often have to fight the way my mind and body automatically respond to him. The deference. I have trouble meeting his eyes. When he's angry or annoyed, I tense up. When he's angry or annoyed at me, I flinch and become uneasy. The first time, before I could even consider resisting, I actually bared my neck.
And that sense of responsibility and protectiveness that I'm getting from him is overwhelming at times. I feel safe and smothered all at once. I feel like a child in the presence of a powerful, intimidating father. And I've found myself becoming anxious when I go too long without seeing him, as if I have to reassure myself that he's still there. I've also caught myself running to him when I’m upset or having a bad day. I think I’ve begun to crave the way I feel when I'm in his presence. Like a drug.
I recognize these feelings. I remember feeling them right after Coraline turned me. But she’d turned me without my consent, and I was unable to get past the pain of that betrayal. I don't have that obstacle, that shield, with Josef. I asked- no, begged- him to turn me back.
I can feel him nearby. That’s another perk, this awareness. He's coming now. I can sense some of the things on his mind. I would have preferred to put this off as long as possible, but I guess the time has come. It's time for us to sit down and have a long-overdue discussion about these changes. Time to have a talk with my new Sire.


Josef

What did I do? It had been a moment of weakness in the face of his desperation. He’d begged. He’d called me brother. I only did what he wanted. But he’d wanted what he had never wanted. Does that even make sense? So did I do him a favor or not? Did I help him by giving him what he'd asked for? Or damn him once again to the life he'd despised and finally escaped?
He's my- dare I say it?- best friend. And more, now. I tried to deny it, reason it away with the fact that he had already been turned by Coraline fifty-five years ago. But I couldn't fool myself and I couldn't fool him. How could I, when we could both feel it? It's nothing a mortal could possibly comprehend: the feelings and instincts that bond vampires together, particularly a Sire and his fledgling.
There. I said it. Sire.
I resisted it because I didn't want our friendship to change. And I didn't want to compare it to my failed attempt with Sarah. My Sarah, who doesn’t live but cannot die, because of me. I couldn't bear it if it were to happen again. And to Mick.
But it didn’t happen. The turning worked. And technically, I am new at being a Sire. Sarah's eternal coma hasn't ever allowed me to experience the full effect. The feelings are stronger, probably because I'm aware of Mick’s as well as mine. My instincts, my responsibilities as a Sire, aren’t muted anymore.
I've always been a little protective of Mick. He's so much younger. He severed his ties to his Sire- now former Sire- and young vampires without their Sires are not only dangerous, but in danger. They also tend to be lonely and unhappy. The relationship a fledgling has with his Sire usually defines what kind of vampire he will become, in the same way that a child is shaped by the teachings and examples of his parents.
Now the protectiveness I feel is much stronger, harder to resist. I feel that I must stand over him to keep him safe, at the same time knowing it is something he doesn’t want. He wants to feel strong. And he seems to have been returned to his former strength and skill rather than to those of a newborn vampire- which, by the way, isn't saying much, from my point of view. Fifty-five years is barely beyond infancy for an immortal, especially without the guidance of an attentive Sire. But that's neither here nor there.
Although Mick has been restored to his former "strength"- maybe age is a better word- he seems to have been cursed with some of the emotional reflexes of a newborn. I've noticed his insecurity, and his actions and reactions when he's near me. He doesn’t want any of them. And yet he comes to me now, a few times a week, to calm his instinctive uncertainty. He's drawn to me. A Sire is a fledgling's ultimate source of comfort and safety; often that continues even after it is no longer as desperately needed as it is in the beginning. And Mick never let himself go to Coraline.
I feel a powerful sense of dominance, so strong that I often have to fight to suppress it. I push down the desire to make him submit, to make him obey me- my instincts say there is something so right about it, so fulfilling. That it's just the way it was meant to be.
Actually, it ties in with the protectiveness toward him. My dominance is intended to keep him safe, even from himself, from his own mistakes. That’s how it is for newborns: they must be controlled as well as taught, cared for until they learn to control themselves and can be socialized into the vampire Community. New turns are dependent on their Sires for everything.
But Mick's not a new turn. Not really.
Even so, we both seem to have developed the instincts and emotions. It's probably normal on my part. I know that Sires usually feel this way about their fledgling always. They simply endure the parting process as their little bird leaves the nest, as it were. Much like mortal parents. And most vampires will retain many of their feelings toward their Sires- especially the instincts of submission- if they continue a relationship with them.
But Mick seems to be feeling almost as dependent as a new turn. Not quite, or he would be unable to leave my presence at all for a while. But it’s bad enough for him that he seeks me out much more often than was his custom, and usually for no more reason than that he simply needs the reassurance that I'm still here. His behavior is that of a fledgling barely a year or two old, past the crucial dependence, but not on his own quite yet. And it’s my job to be here whenever he needs me.
Although I've come to accept these things, Mick has refused. Denial isn’t just a river in Egypt. I know he feels it. He has to, but he doesn’t want to admit it. And now, we have to address the issue and decide how we're going to proceed. We can't continue on normally until we do. Not that the situation we’re in is normal. But maybe between the two of us, we can find a new kind of normal.

[halfcent]

Chapter Two


Mick knew they had to do this, for the sake of their peace of mind, but now that the hour was upon them he was having second thoughts. And third and fourth. He needed a little more time to get his thoughts together, to decide on his approach. He just really didn’t want to, to be honest. It was bound to be emotional and sincere and all that… stuff… that he and Josef were so careful to omit from their everyday dealings with each other. They were best friends, but not… mushy. He couldn’t imagine how Josef had managed to talk himself into taking the first step, because he despised that kind of stuff even more than Mick did, but he’d somehow managed to work himself up to initiate this talk… this conversation… that had become oh so necessary.
Mick decided right then and there that he would like to avoid it at all costs.
But that was, apparently, not to be.
He moved toward the door as he felt Josef approach from the other side, but stopped a couple of feet away.
And discovered that he, Mick St John, was a coward.
C’mon, Mick. Open the door. Just open the door. You can do it. Get this over with and open the damned door.
He’d never been very good at self-motivation.
Josef didn’t bother knocking. They each knew the other was just on the other side.
“Open the door, Mick.” Josef unknowingly – or maybe not so unknowingly… that would bear thinking about later – echoed Mick’s thoughts. Mick could feel Josef’s amusement, and his own lips quirked up in a half-smile in response.
“I don’t want to.”
“Sorry to hear that.”
“Can’t we do this later?”
“It is later, Mick.”
“If I don’t open the door will you go away?”
“Nope.”
“What if I pay you?”
“I’m already rich.”
“Well… I guess I might as well just open the door then.”
“Might as well.”
Mick unbolted the door and pulled it open to see Josef standing calmly in wait. Josef cocked his head a little the side and smiled.
“Hi, Mick.”
“Hello, Josef.”
Josef stepped through the doorway, brushed past Mick, and proceeded into the room. He sat in the living room chair and propped his feet up onto the low table in front of him.
“Please, come in,” Mick said with a wry touch of sarcasm as he pushed shut the door.
“Thanks,” Josef replied, no slouch himself in the sarcasm department. “Don’t mind if I do.”
Mick put his hands in his pockets, took them out, put them back them in. He took a few steps into the room, then stopped. He was a complete loss. His vampire instincts said he should be calm and comforted by the presence of his sire. His human instincts told him to avoid the awkwardness of this discussion – or more importantly, the issues it would force him to face. He was at war with himself.
He decided to plead ignorance, knowing full well it wouldn’t fool the one man who could sense his feelings, maybe even his thoughts.
“So,” he hedged. “What’s up?”
The smile Josef gave him was at once indulgent and knowing. “C’mon, Mick. You know what’s up. You feel the changes too. We have to talk about this.”
Mick tried once more. “About what?”
“About last night’s football scores.”
“What?” Mick started, caught off guard.
“You know what. We can’t keep going on like this. Neither of us is happy or at ease, and if we ignore it, we’ll both soon be plain miserable.”
Mick gave up pretense. “It’s been two weeks and we’re doing okay. Right? Why now? Why do you all of a sudden, for the first time in over four hundred years, have the urge for a heart to heart?”
“We’re not okay, Mick. We’re not doing badly yet, but we’re not okay and it’s only going to get worse if we don’t face it. It’s not something we can hide from. And as for why now… that’s my own fault. We should have done this two weeks ago when we first knew the turning took the way it did. When we first felt the bonding. But I’m here now. And as for why? Because it’s my job. That’s my role in all this and I intend to do my duty to the fullest extent.”
Mick couldn’t explain the sharp pang of… something… at the thought that Josef was here only because he felt he had a job to do. But he pushed it down, and instead, he snorted.
“Duty? Your duty? C’mon, Josef. All of a sudden, you’re the little vampire Boy Scout?”
Josef tilted his head. “Vampire Boy Scout? I think that’s more my style of one-liner. I like it. Mind if I keep it for future use?”
“Be my guest,” Mick replied, knowing full well he’d just condemned himself to hearing that phrase – and any possible variations – turned against him for at least the next century.
Josef dropped his feet from the table to the floor, sat forward in the chair, and rested his elbows on his knees. All amusement had vanished in the place of this ultra-serious pose, and Mick sighed in resignation at Josef’s stare. Knowing it was time to get down to business, he moved over to the couch, sat on the end closest to Josef, and mirrored his pose. It bothered him a little that he couldn’t tell if he’d made the mature decision himself or if the fledgling instinct had kicked in at knowing what his sire wanted and expected from him.
They were silent for a few seconds, neither sure where to begin and each hoping the other would go first.
Finally, Mick sat back, the slight distance doing nothing to alleviate the emotions he was trying not to sense from Josef. Josef carried himself with an intimidating air at the best of times, and now that Mick could sense him so much more powerfully because of their link, any emotion stronger than amiability became overwhelming. Especially if it was aimed at him.
“You start,” Mick demanded. Because you’re the one who’s forcing this. That silent thought rose between them, and Mick instantly hoped that Josef couldn’t really be so powerful as to read his thoughts. That could make life difficult.
“Okay,” Josef agreed, but still said nothing.
Mick realized that Josef was just as unsure about this as he was. Uncertainty not being one of the emotions he felt swirling around in Josef, Mick realized the elder vampire must have the ability to hide things from him, even across their link. Mick knew he himself did not yet have that power and wondered why the thought of Josef being able to made him uneasy.
Mick raised an inquiring eyebrow – well? – waiting for him to begin (but wishing he’d just leave it and go home.)
“Don’t rush me,” Josef snapped. “I took the first step by coming here. That’s as far as I planned.”
“You could go home and plan the rest, come back later,” Mick joked, but hopefully.
“Hmph,” Josef grunted good-naturedly. “That’s my boy, always with a solution.”
“Anything to help.”
Josef caught Mick’s eyes suddenly, and asked, “How have you been sleeping?”
“What?”
“You look tired. Like you haven’t been sleeping well.”
Mick said nothing but his silence answered for him. Yeah, he was really going to have to look into that possible mind reading thing.
“It’s been five days since you last came to see me,” Josef continued. “You were coming every two or three, at least.”
“You’re keeping track? I’m flattered.”
Josef didn’t take the intended bait and Mick squirmed under the intensity of his friend’s too-serious gaze.
“So what?” Mick asked, a tad defensively when Josef remained silent. “You worried I won’t get enough beauty sleep?”
It was meant to be another joke, a deflection of Josef’s observing stare, but it came out with too much of an edge.
Josef still didn’t speak, just kept staring. Mick could feel it, boring down into his bones. He wanted to shout, Stop it! Stop looking at me like you can see my soul.
“You wanted to talk, so talk.” He was beginning to feel agitated, irritated. Out of sorts. He began tapping his thumb on the arm of the couch and shaking one leg nervously. He couldn’t take that stare any longer. He couldn’t, and neither could the fledgling inside of him. He looked away.
“Why are you here if you have nothing to say? This was your idea.”
Still nothing.
Mick tried a different tack. “I’m okay, you know. I don’t need you.”
The older vampire remained silent - How long could he possibly last? – but Mick finally got a reaction from him, albeit a small one. Josef raised one eyebrow. Mick felt a childish thrill of victory at the tiny gesture, but it was at vanquished at when he realized what he’d said and how it sounded.
He awkwardly backpedaled. “I mean, I need you as my friend. You’re a good friend. But that’s all I need, Josef. Really. This… thing… between us. It doesn’t have to mean anything. We can go on as usual.”
Mick waited for a response but got nothing. Josef’s eyes narrowed only slightly and he intensified his gaze. Mick felt a sudden, hot burst of anger.
“Stop it,” he demanded hotly “How can you sit there like a rock and just look at me? I can feel you. I know you’re not that stoic. And don’t think I don’t know why you’re really here! I can take care of myself. I don’t need you. I don’t need you to take care of me!”
No more than two or three minutes had passed since Josef had begun his little staring game but to Mick it felt like eternity. He was shaking now, with anger and – if he was being honest with himself – a little trepidation. Friend or not, Josef was not usually one to allow something he might see as opposition, and now they had the sire/fledgling instincts of dominance and submission to add into the mix. Mick waited for Josef’s inevitable reaction. When it came, it was the one reaction he hadn’t been prepared for.
Josef smiled in triumph.
And Mick realized he’d been led. He wanted to shout at Josef. Yell. Maybe even kick and scream. But what good would that do? None at all, and it would probably just worsen the situation. But he still had a point to make.
“I’m serious, Josef,” he said in a calmer state. “I don’t need your help. I’m fine. I just need to deal with things in my own time, in my own way. I’m okay.”
Maybe if he said it enough times he’d begin to believe it himself. Josef obviously wasn’t buying it.
“And I don’t need you to take care of me.”
Josef gave a barely perceptible nod of his head and finally broke his silence.
“And therein lies the problem, my friend."

[jen]

This is a wonderful exploration of the side effects of Mick's returning in FTP. The strong bonds that were hinted at in vampire society were a fascinating facet of the show that were left for us to explore in fanfiction and you have made a fabulous start here.

Just chalk it up to unintended consequences.

The bonds in Moonlight are strong and play off each other fascinatingly.

Thank you!

[halfcent]

Thank you! Changes was my first fic, Moonlight or otherwise. I was fascinated by the re-turning scene in FTB and wished they had explored that more in the episodes following it (though they might have in a second season, who knows). And I am also fascinated with the strong bonds between vampires, and particularly the supossed strong bond between Sire and fledgeling. That is what inspired the fic to continue for 31 chapters LOL, though to be honest it did kind of take on a life of it's own. Parltly, I wanted to show a non-slash side of it since everyone else seemed to be doing slash at the time I began it lol.

[halfcent]

Chapter Three


Josef



"And therein lies the problem, my friend", Josef said to his friend. Would Mick understand?
Mick frowned. "What? What problem, Josef? If it's the fact that I don't need you to take care of me as you so concietedly imagine, that's not my problem. It's yours."
"The problem, Mick," Josef said, enunciating slowly, " is not that you don't need me. The problem is that you think you don't need me. And that does make it your problem, friend. And mine."
"Well. Aren't we feeling very self-important today." Mick stood up from the couch abruptly, and paced a few feet away. He came to a stop, his back to Josef.
Josef stood up as well and approached him. He knew what Mick was feeling, as well as he knew his own emotions. He'd had that ability before, but only slightly- it had come from the power of his age and because he and Mick were so close as friends. But now it was so much stronger that sometimes he had a hard time with it. Just a little, he tried telling himself. And he had the age and experience to handle it. It also required an amount of training that Coraline must have overlooked. He knew that to Mick, without the experience or power yet, it must be overwhelming. Training, Josef thought offhandedly. Coraline had apparently skipped a few lessons that would now fall under Josef's domain, albeit half a century late. Never let it be said that Josef Kostan was one to shy away from responsibility. But that was something for later.
"What can I say," Josef quipped in response to his childe's caustic remark. " I have a very high self-esteem."
That Mick was not amused was clear. Even if the link between them didn't exist, any idiot could read the straightening of the spine and tensing of the shoulders as a clear sign of anger. And Josef was no idiot.
Josef hated to see his friend hurting, and the Sire inside him had a strong desire to comfort Mick, to calm his fears and uncertainties. For the last two weeks, he'd been pushing down many of the things that were now instincts where Mick was concerned, knowing that until he could make Mick face up to the changes, very little would be well recieved. And of course, there was his own coil of apprehension, knowing that this situation was different than any other either of them had ever known. He wasn't completely sure what to do with a new fledgeling that wasn't really altogether new. Of course, no one ever needed to know that he occassionally second guessed himself. Ever.
And supressing instincts was hard. It was tiring- exhausting, really. It wore on the mind, and he knew that was part of Mick's struggle. And Josef decided right then and there to stop doing it. Right then. And Mick would, too, if he had anything to say about it, though that might take some time. It was unnatural, and he was sick of it.
And right then, his wish was to make Mick feel better about himself. Still behind Mick, he put a hand on his shoulder.
"Mick," he began, but was interupted when the younger vampire roughly shrugged his hand away. Josef felt the first tiny spark of anger, but he knew that wouldn't help. He snuffed it out, at least as much as possible, as much as his unpredictable temper would allow. He let his hand fall away and began again, this time uninterrupted.
"Mick, I know how you feel. Literally. I can feel it all, and some of it's normal. The confusion and uncertainty. But some of it's not. I can feel how angry you are, but I'm not understanding why." Josef paused, hoping for a response. When none was forthcoming, he continued. "Is it...." and here he paused again, almost afraid of voicing the question. No, not afraid of voicing it, but of hearing the answer to it. "Is it because I turned you back? Are you unable to forgive me for this?"
Mick's anger flagged, and Josef watched as the proud-straight spine loosened and the shoulders sagged. "No, Josef," Mick said quietly. "Don't ever think that. I asked you. You only did what I wanted."
Something loosened a little within Josef, but he tried not to show his relief. "Then where is this anger coming from? What's going on in your head?"
Finally, Mick turned. He looked at Josef and Josef could see that the anger was still there, in his eyes, just dormant for the moment. "I'm mad at me, Josef. At myself. And maybe at Beth, for being the reason I had to make the decision to turn back. I don't know. I hope to God not. But I can't be mad at you for this because you only did as I asked, and you didn't even want to do it. And that's where my anger is coming from, okay? That I can't be mad at you for turning me back."
Josef thought he understood. Mick had spent his whole vampiric life hating what he was, his very nature, and the woman that made him that way. He'd had a place to focus his anger and hate- at Coraline. But now, he's back the way he was, he's lost what he'd most wanted, and it was by his own doing. He no longer had anyone else to blame. Josef thought back to Mick's earlier angry outburst, and to some of the emotions he'd gleaned from Mick in the past two weeks. He thought about the fact that Mick had begun to resist the strong instincts of the fledgeling inside him by resisting Josef's calming presence, thereby hurting himself even worse in the process. And in Josef's mind it all came together, clicked into place. He was angry at himself for not seeing it sooner. As well as he knew Mick, he should have thought about this.
"Being a vampire's not the issue at all, is it, Mick? You're actually coming to terms with that now, I think."
Mick stilled, and Josef felt the spike of apprehension that shot through the younger vampire. Yep. He was on the right track. Of course, far be it from Mick to make it easy.
Mick opened his mouth to voice what Josef knew would be a denial, seemed to think better of it, and just looked at him, obviously debating. "What are you getting at, Josef?" He finally asked, almost cautiously. Not a denial, but not an admission. Not quite yet.
Josef smiled, sure now that he'd been on the mark. "Yes. I see it now, Mick. All these years you've moaned and groaned and pitied yourself for being a 'monster'. Because you'd been given no choice before being turned. But now that you've been turned back willingly, by your own decision- even forced as it might have been- you no longer have the same pitying ideas about your nature. You've lost the mortality you wanted, but you no longer mind being what you are. Or at least that's the direction you're headed. Am I right?"
Mick didn't reply, and looked anywhere but at Josef, and Josef nodded and gave a little smile. "I'm right," he answered himself smugly. "It is me you have a problem with, isn't it? Not that I turned you back, but because now that I'm your sire, you're dependant on me. Not nearly as much as a truly new turn, it's true, but much more than you've ever been since your newborn days with Coraline. And since you broke away from her as early as you could possibly manage, you've been self-sufficient all these years. You're actually mourning what you percieve as the loss of your independence."
Mick's jaw tightened, but he no longer tried to deny it. " I remember those days, Josef, and I don't want them back. It's not as bad now as it was then. No bloodlust and I'm already familiar with my heightened senses, so that was no problem. I don't feel the need to cling to you every minute, like I did Coraline at first and I don't need your blood like I did hers. But there's so much more here now. I don't want our friendship to change in that way, Josef. I don't want to have to need you like that."
Josef felt for him, he really did, but they had to face reality. "But you do, Mick. I
didn't choose it that way and niether did you, but that's how it is and we have to face it. We can come to terms with it, Mick."
"But, Josef," Mick protested, an almost pleading tone in his voice now, " even as old as you are, you must remember your early days. What it was like. I don't want that back. I don't want a 'master', Josef."
"And I'm not, Mick. I'm your friend, your brother. But now I'm also your Sire, and that's not going to go away. Did you even stop to think that I'm dealing with the same strong instincts? I've been suppressing part of my nature and you know that's not like me. But I was doing it for you, Mick, because I know you've been having a hard time with this and I didn't want to push you. But I realize now that that was a mistake; my mistake. I can see you headed down a whole new self-destructive path of your own design, and I can't let that happen."
Josef saw Mick flinch a little, knowing that the younger 'man' was aware of his rising anger. But Josef was done coddling him. It was time to lay it on the line and see what happened. They couldn't continue this way.
" I know that you've been resisting the urge to come see me, and for no better reason that that you don't like the idea that you need it. But it's affecting you. That's why you haven't slept, and don't try to deny it. Have you even fed recently? The urge to gain comfort in the security of a sire's presence is as crucial as feeding to a fledgeling. And yes, before you say it, I know you're not a newborn, but you have the urges, which means you're at that stage where it's necessary."
Mick stared at him for a moment, his new instincts pushing him toward Josef, but his own natural reticence and stubbornness pulling him away. Then he sighed with unneeded breath- an old habit- and said despondantly, " I still wish things could stay the same."
Josef nodded in agreement, and sensed that they were over this particular crisis. Hopefully. "C'mon," he said lightly, smiling. " It won't be that bad. Think of it this way; your standing in the community has changed."
"What do you mean?"
"You've traded up, Mick."
"Your levels of narcissistic behavior never cease to amaze me, Josef."
"No offense, buddy, but you've got to admit it. You're a young vampire by any stantards, and until now you were an 'orphan'. You and I both know that a vampire's place in the Community owes a large part as to who your sire is, until you make a name for yourself. And your resistance of our very nature didn't do you any favors, you know. No matter how they think of you, you did okay at holding your own, but a big part of that is because the fact that you're my friend is well known. No body wants to piss of the Community Elder."
"Wow, Josef. Thanks for the vote of confidence."
Josef was glad to see Mick regainging some of his usual humor. "You're welcome. Until now, you've been hanging around on the fringes of the Community, and spending more time with the humans than your own kind. But now that you belong to-" and here Josef caught himself just in time- or maybe not, judging by the glare Mick was shooting him. Josef cleared his throat. "I mean," he doggedly continued, " Now that I'm your Sire, you'll be respected. You'll have more status. But," and now Josef hesitated, not sure if he should continue this now, but deciding to bite the bullet, so to speak, " as the childe of the Community Elder, you- both of us really- have appearances to keep up. Responsibility to set an example. There are a few things that ....need to be done differently now, Mick."
Mick narrowed his eyes. "And what things would that be, Josef?" he asked suspiciously.
"I think it would be a good idea for you to spend a little more time within the Community. Whether you like it or not, vampires need each other. Eternity is a long time to be at odds with your own kind. Just come to more of the meetings and gatherings. It's going to be expected now. And try not to be so embroiled in the afffairs of the mortals."
Mick gave a little shake of his head. "Don't do this, Josef. Don't try to change me to fit what you think I should be."
"I'm not trying to change you, Mick. I'm trying to enrich you. You've never let yourself be free, to feel the joy of embracing your true nature. And I'm not saying I want you to disregard your friends or break away from your precious humans. Just keep it in moderation, even if it's just for a little while."
"Fine. I'll spend more time among the community, show my face. If that's what you want. I'll even play nice. But I'm not going to stop seeing Beth. You can't ask me to do that."
"And I'm not. I'm not blind, Mick. I know you care for her more than you let on. But I would like you to put forth a little more effort into keeping her out of the affairs of our kind. She already knows too much, and that's dangerous for both of you."
Knowing that was an undisputable truth, Mick didn't even try to protest. "Fair enough," he agreed.
"Good," Josef answered. "Another thing, Mick," - Josef knew this one was going to go over about as well as a spoonful of silver- " I want you back on tap."
The expected response was immediate. "No," Mick shook his head emphatically. "No way, Josef. I can't do that. You know how I feel about feeding from humans. I may be coming to terms with what I am, but I'm still holding on to my principles."
Josef's irritation was mounting. " It's for your own safety, Mick. For one thing, it's unhealthy. You can't get the proper nutrition needed without fresh blood, even if it's only every so often. I've told you that before, and it's still true. You're young enough that you need it still. Even in your youth, you should have developed a few skills by now that you don't have. Your power is weaker than it should be and you don't even realize it."
"I don't care about that, Josef. Maybe later I will, but right now I'm still-"
"Also," Josef interrupted Mick and silenced him with a glare (knowing that probably wouldn't have worked as well before the turning), "there's the matter of security. Now that I'm your sire"-he was becoming much more comfortable saying it- " my enemies are your enemies. If anyone wants to get to me, they could easily use you. Or maybe just go after you as a matter of principle. You could be a target now, and right now your an easy one. It would be much harder for that to happen if you stay strong."
"I can take care of myself."
Great. Back to that. "Didn't we just go through this?"
"I can't do it, Josef. I won't."
"This is necessary, Mick. It's not something I'm willing to debate."
"And niether am I. I won't be forced into something I'm against. Even by my best friend."
Josef had to fight the rising tide of anger. His next words were almost a growl. "Patience is a virtue, Mick, but not one of mine. And you're doing a good job of draining whatever I had in reserve."
Mick's eyes were flashing angrily and his voice reflected the emotion. "I won't do it. You can't make me do this."
Josef lifted his chin, but he didn't say anything. He didn't need to. They both knew that if it came to that, he could make him. He had the right and he had the power and that was all he needed.
But he got his point across. Josef felt a pang as he watched Mick's eyes go flat, and when Mick spoke, his voice was cold and devoid of inflection.
"So. That's how it's gonna be. You issue your decrees and I blindly follow your commands. I guess if that's how you want it, I have no choice. But don't expect me to just fall into line and accept it unconditionally. Now if we're finished here, I have to meet a client."
The dismissal was evident. In seconds, Josef went through a myriad of emotions. Indignation at being dismissed like an underling, annoyance at Mick deliberately taking it the wrong way, and a sharp hurt at the coldness in Mick's voice and words. And he was aware that it stemmed from Mick's own hurt at what he percieved to be a betrayal by Josef. But the emotion that ruled him right now was the anger he'd been trying to extinguish for some time and it was almost a relief to let some of it through.
If this was the way Mick wanted to play it, then fine. Josef could play hardball with the best of them.He made his voice cold- easy for him- and he made sure to project his anger at Mick. He wanted him to feel it. "Fine. I'll expect you at my place at least twice a week to feed from a fresh source. There's a city wide Community meeting at my place a week from today, ten pm. Be there."
Mick walked to the door with a stony face. He jerked the door open for Josef and stepped back. "As you wish," he said with sarcasm and derision.
Josef clenched his teeth and fought the urge to put this young upstart in his place, and instead he stalked angrily past Mick and out the door. Mick slammed the door behind him, and Josef heard the bolt on the other side being engaged.
As if the slamming door were a signal, all but one emotion drained from Josef's body. He was filled with regret. He hurt at the thought that he might have just thrown away their long friendship. In a moment of indecision, he raised his hand to knock on the door or force his way back inside, he wasn't sure. But at the last second, instead, he just settled his palm on the surface of the door, wishing for a moment that he'd been able to handle this differently.
He had no idea that on the other side of the thick steel door, his best friend had done the exact same thing, and their hands lay atop each other- palm to palm and fingers to fingers- with only the door to separate them.
Then he turned and walked away. He had a business to run.


On the other side of the door, Mick's forehead was pressed against the steel despondantly, and his hand slid down the door slowly to hang at his side as Josef's presence faded.

[halfcent]

Chapter Four



Mick


Where does he get off? Mick thought. He angrily snatched his car keys from the table top. So much for friendship. He just couldn't let it go. Ever since the bitter argument between Josef and himself yesterday, he'd been feeding a festering anger. He'd actually held onto the anger deliberately, fed it, nourished it. He had to. Because as much as he hated- regretted- the vicious feelings between himself and Josef since yesterday's fight, that bitterness was preferable to what would be left if the anger wasn't there to cover it up. Because he knew that much of what Josef had said was right. He didn't want to admit it, but the evidence was right there, a part of him, and it was impossible to deny. At least to himself. And to Josef, the little thought forced it's way through the anger and into his mind. But no, those thoughts weren't allowed to intrude, and he pushed it down as far as he could. Which of course wasn't far enough, but it was the best he could do.
He slammed the car door hard as he got behind the wheel, but didn't start the car just yet, still lost in his inner fumings. Josef's always liked power, and now he's trying to throw his weight around with me. Who does he think he is?
He started the car with a harsh twist of the ignition key, causing the starter to grind as he twisted the key just a little too hard. He winced at the sound and took a moment to be glad that he hadn't snapped the key- or the ignition- in his anger. He pulled out of his parking space and headed in the direction that would take him to Josef's lavish home. He knows how I feel about these things. And now, here he is, trying to change me. Friends don't do that.
He was trying to keep himself convinced that he was going to see Josef because that was what Josef wanted. He'd told him as much yesterday- orderd it, in fact. He tried to hold on to the idea that if he had to do it, he might as well do it now and get it over with. And that was how he felt....some. But not really as strong as he was trying to portray to himself. True, he wasn't eager to just go against the morals he'd held for so long by feeding from Josef's humans, but he had to admit - again, damn it- that Josef's concerns in that area were valid. And Mick harbored no delusions that Josef would not take aggressive action if he failed to comply. Mick had no intention of enduring another visit from Josef under those circumstances, in which he'd very likely escort Mick to his home like a truant schoolboy, or at the very least bring a freshie with him to Mick's apartment and try to force feed him.
So, yes. These were realistic, valid reasons for him to be turning up the drive that led to Josef's large estate. And true reasons as well, in large part. What he was trying his damndest to deny- and not so convincingly, at that- was the reason that hed given in so soon. He'd originally planned to hold out as long as he thought Josef would allow before giving in to his friend's demands. But the truth of the matter was this- he needed it. By the time Josef had come to him yesterday, Mick had resisted the pull for five days- two or three days longer than he'd managed ever before, since the turning- and he had been just about to give in to the need. He'd been nervous and uneasy and, strangely, had felt his self-confidence waning. He'd been unable to sleep after the first three days and had began to feel too agitated to feed or even to use the blood syringes he often depended on. But he'd resisted because he'd been vexed at the knowledge that he needed Josef to feel validated. And then Josef had come, they'd had that so pleasant quality time, and their mutual anger had prevented Mick from taking a fledgleling's comfort from Josef as would normally happen. And it had kept Josef from consciously offering it, as well.
Once Josef had gone, it hadn't taken Mick long to start to feel the first little threads of rebellion trying to set in. And he'd given into it, at first. He'd show him. He'd show Josef that he could resist it. He was familiar with these feelings from his first turning. He'd felt this same dependence on Coraline- regardless of her lacking as a Sire. But he wasn't a newborn anymore, he was stronger that that. So he'd show Josef that it wasn't necessary for him to become the Father to his Childe, and that they could stay best friends without the complications of the stronger instincts that kept trying to intrude and rule them.
Mick's annoyance had known no bounds when daybreak had come and he'd realized it was going to be another sleepless day because he couldn't calm the emotions tornado-ing through him. And it became even worse when he could no longer deny that he had to see Josef. It became a driving need, and he'd had to resist the urge to suffer the daylight to go to him and the comfort he knew would be there. If he'd let it, of course. But he had to, he knew that. He felt....ragged. He didn't know how else to explain it. Like a drug addict without his fix, he had to have it. Of course, he didn't have to let Josef know that.
Of course, Josef probably already knew, but Mick decided it couldn't hurt to hold on to his illusions as long as possible. Most likely, Josef was sitting calmly in his study or home office just waiting for Mick to give in and come to him, knowing he would have to sooner or later. And he would be ready with a sarcastic remark or humorous quip,thinking that it could solve everything, that it could erase his betrayal. Okay, Mick thought to himself. Maybe betrayal is a little harsh. But still- fifty years of friendship and he has to go and get all demanding on me. What he wouldn't give for Josef to be the same old mentor he'd always been. Even just three weeks ago, when Josef would criticise Mick's life choices, tell him how he should change and give advice on how he was suppossed to accomplish that. Mick would listen to him, banter back with him, then promptly ignore the unasked for advice. Then they would both go on their merrily way till next time, both secretly satisfied with just the way the other really is. Best friends. That's the way it should be.
Unless of course Josef was still mad at him.
That thought stilled Mick's hand as he reached for the car's door handle. He paused, then he sat back against the seat, thinking. This was the first time the possibility had entered his thoughts, but he should have considered it sooner. What if Josef was still mad at him?
He'd spent all this time focusing on his anger toward the older vampire that he hadn't even considered any possible repercussions for his own part in their argument. Now he felt a whole new anxiety join the rest on his already frayed nerves. He knew Josef could be a force to be reckoned with, and could hold a grudge indefinately. Could Josef possibly be angry enough that he didn't want to see him? Maybe wanted nothing more to do with him? He'd told Mick straight out that he was sapping whatever patience Josef posessed. Maybe Josef had decided to wash his hands of Mick.
Now Mick was torn. He so badly needed- and wanted- to soak himself in Josef's aura, to seek comfort and ease the edginess that was caused by the Sire/fledgling separation, and yet still angry that he needed it. But now he was also anxious, half afraid and half certain that Josef had decided that Mick wasn't worth the trouble and couldn't care less whether he ever saw Mick again.
He bit his lip, thinking. Josef's expecting me. He's the one that told me to be here. He couldn't explain the feelings of hope and helplessness under all the other emotions. Mick knew, knew, that he didn't want this new expansion of their relationship. And yet, he experienced a wild hope that he was wrong in his assumptions and a desolate depression that maybe he was right. He almost panicked at the thought that maybe Josef didn't want him anymore. And besides all that- when had he began worrying whether anyone wanted him or not? As if he were a posession to be kept or tossed away on the owner's whim.
Well, it didn't matter anyway. He was so close to Josef, he could feel his presence in the large house, two floors up and at the back. The need was becoming too strong and he just wanted relief from this swirling chaos inside of him. Instinct was trying to take over, and the fledgeling wanted his sire. Now.
Mick threw the car door open and nearly leapt out in his rush. But then he stopped himself, forced himself to take a moment to gather his thoughts and clear his mind. And hold onto the anger. If he lost himself in instincts, he could very well run in there full tilt and make a fool of himself, and that was never good. And besides, whatever else was going on inside him, he still wasn't ready to let Josef off the hook for yesterday. He was still mad.
Holding on to the anger would help him focus.


------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Josef


Josef terminated his business call as quickly as protocol would allow. He'd known Mick was near before he'd been informed of a visitor by his house employee, but it had taken him almost that long to end the business with tact, rather than simply hanging up on that pompous old windbag on the other end of the line like he'd wanted to. Such political incorrectness was quite bad for business. And for Josef, when the pompous old windbag was several hundred years older than Josef himself.
He'd been suprised that Mick had given in so soon. He'd actually been prepared to have to force the issue, and unprepared to deal with it at this particular moment. True, instincts were hard to ignore, and Josef had been aware of how hard Mick's were pushing at him- but still.... that boy always had been a stubborn cuss. As much as Josef wanted what was best for his friend and fledgeling, and knew Mick needed to give in as soon as possible for his own well-being, he'd been secretly hoping the younger vampire would give him time to recoup from last night's "festivities". Josef had not yet decided how to best proceed. He had his own whole set of instincts pushing at him, but he just wasn't sure that giving in to them quite yet would be the best way to deal with Mick. He'd caused enough damage already by ignoring this whole situation for two and a half weeks, and he was determined to handle it right from here on out.
If only he knew what was right.
Josef did not like not knowing what was best. He always knew what to do. Well, usually. And when he didn't, he was a master at making sure everyone else thought he knew what to do. The older you got, the more confident you had to be to survive in the big boy's game. Did other Sires feel like this when getting used to their fledgeling's? Or was it just because this was a unique situation? Leave it to the two of them to hatch a situation that no vampire has ever before encountered. They seemed to be magnets for difficult situations.
Josef stared at the door, feeling Mick approach, waiting for him to enter. When he did, Josef was struck at the difference in Mick's appearance just since the night before.
He looks like hell.
"You look like hell." Oops. So much for tactful.
Mick just gave a one-shoulder shrug and remainded silent. Rather than seating himself in front of Josef's desk as he normally would have before, now he wandered around the spacious office, seemingly interested in the many decorative artifacts and artwork scattered randomly around the room.
Josef simply waited, watching.
Eventually, there was nothing left for Mick to pretend was so interesting about the office he'd seen a hundred times before, and he slowly made his way toward the desk. Josef thought he would take a seat in one of the plush armchairs, but instead he stopped a couple feet away and just.....stood.
"Mick."
"Josef..." Mick's eyes, carefully trained on the floor, flicked up to Josef when he said his name, then back down.
Josef frowned. He'd expected Mick to be out of sorts. After all, it had only been twenty-four hours since he'd seen him, and then he'd been angry, upset, defiant. He hadn't expected him to come in here all lollipops and sunshine, but there was a new quality to his demeanor now. There was a hesitancy in him. He seemed almost.... scared. Josef could sense that it was more than the fledgling sensing a sire's dominance, because Mick was still fighting that instinct and Josef hadn't pushed the issue yet. No- it was something else.
"I'm suprised to see you," Josef remarked. He'd meant to convey that he hadn't expected Mick to show up so immediately, but apparently it meant something else to Mick because the younger vampire's posture went stiff.
"Mick, are you okay?" Josef asked in concern- and curiosity.
"You... you told me to be here."
Josef was suprised to hear a note of almost pleading desperation in Mick's voice. "I just didn't think you'd give up so easily. You're stubbornness matches mine," Josef joked, trying to lighten the mood.
The sentiment was lost on Mick, though. "I.... needed to, Josef. But I can go. I'm sorry."
Mick turned to go, looking despondant, and Josef frowned. Time for the big guns. He sent a little push across their link, trying to get a feel for Mick's emotions. Mick jumped a little and looked up in suprise at the light intrusion in his mind, but Josef continued. Even when Mick's expression began to show an edge of anger at his apparent lack of privacy- even over his own emotions.
Josef spent a couple seconds rooting around under all the other stuff he knew he'd find- the hunger, the sleeplessness and the sharp need of contact the fledgling needed with it's sire- until he found what he had began to suspect. Then he pulled away, letting Mick have his mind to himself once more.
"Don't do that!" Mick snarled.
Josef kept his face blank and ignored Mick's outburst for the false bravado and diversionary tactic that he knew it was. "Why don't you have a seat?"
"Forget it, Josef. Never mind, alright? It's okay. I'll come back later if it's... I can come back later." Mick turned to make his escape.
Josef added just a touch of steel to his voice. "Sit down, Mick."
His friend hesitated, then turned back and moved to the chair and seated himself. Josef knew that Mick's compliance had very little- at this moment- to do with their new relationship. Josef was Mick's elder, and the Elder of the community. Even as Josef's best friend, Mick knew when it was smartest to react to Josef's position and the power that came with his age, rather than their friendship. Josef was counting on this, and he'd never had a problem- as Mick knew- using his position and age to his advantage. Even where his younger friend was concerned.
Josef was concerned about the younger vampire. Mick should have taken a measure of reassurance from just being around Josef. That was the natural way of things for thier kind, a normal reaction between a sire and fledgeling. But Mick was fighting it. Between Mick's strong stubborness and his reticence of the new relationship, he was unconciously blocking the natural give and take that should have existed without effort between the two of them. Any thoughts either of them might have harbored of possibly ignoring the new bond, of trying to go on as if it didn't exist, was made moot by Mick's bad reaction. It was obvious that Mick needed the connection despite his wishes, and if Josef were to be honest about it, he'd have to admit that he himself needed it just as badly. He was just able to control it better.
Josef used their link again, but instead of feeling for Mick's mind like he had seconds ago, this time he sent an influence of calm and reassurance. Just lightly at first, but it didn't seem to get past Mick's wall of tangled chaos, so he sent a second, heavier, push. Mick stiffenned at the first second, realizing that he was being influenced, but then relaxed as his edginess began to calm. After Josef's initial manipulation, the link opened as most of Mick's inner resistance began to crumble. After that, it happened naturally, with no help from Josef. They both stilled as the link fairly pulled from Josef what Mick needed. They could both feel it, Josef's aura flowing across their bond. It was a strange feeling, though not painful. Rather, it was fulfilling. And Josef realized that Mick's resistance had been affecting him as well, without his realization. He felt a tension in himself ease, one that he hadn't even recognized was there.
Mick's eyes drifted closed, and Josef smiled as his friend seemed to be savoring the absence of his former turmoil. His body lost the tenseness that had kept him so stiff in his seat and Mick's body just sort of....melted....into the the plush cushions of his chair. His muscles relaxed and his posture became almost boneless. His head fell back against the back of the chair and he sighed- an unneeded act, but an old habit- in contentment and the exhaustion that pervaded him.
"Feel better?" Josef asked, his eyebrows raised in mild amusement.
Mick raised his head and looked at Josef, a little embarrassed. "Yeah," he answered. "Thanks. I guess I needed that more than I thought."
Josef resisted the urge- barely- to say 'I told you so'. Instead, he leaned back in his desk chair- he hadn't realized he'd been sitting on the edge of his seat- and steepled his hands on his desk.
"Tired?" Josef asked. He had an ulterior motive for the single word question, an opportunity for a lesson that he couldn't pass up.
Mick seemed to garner that there was more to Josef's inquiry than simple curiosity, and he became alert with a suspicion that showed itself in his voice when he spoke.
"Yeah. A little."
Josef felt a surge of pride at Mick's quick mind, but was careful to squash it before Mick could discern it. Sharp as a blade, that one.
"More than a little, I'd say."
"I guess. Pretty wiped out, actually."
"Good."
Mick frowned. "Good? Why good?"
"Because a lesson isn't learned without consequences."
"What lesson?"
Yep. Sharp as a blade, but so good at playing dumb.
"You can't let yourself get to this point again, Mick. It's more dangerous than you realize."
"It wasn't intentional, Josef."
"But you let it continue. You should have come sooner, Mick."
"I know," Mick answered quietly. "I don't intend to let it happen again." He had the grace to look sheepish.
"Good. I'm gonna hold you to that."
Mick just nodded, knowing there was nothing he could say. Josef never made idle comments. Mick knew he wouldn't get away with stalling so long again.
"And another thing," Josef continued. Mick sat up a little straighter as Josef's eyes speared him. "I don't care what happens between us, now or ever. Even if I have reason to be angry or at odds with you, even if we're fighting. I will never, ever, deny you what you need. Do you understand?"
Eyes wide at realizing he was outed, Mick just nodded. He was just a little taken aback by the stern tone.
Josef gave a little shake of his head. " Uh uh. I wanna hear it, Mick."
"I understand," Mick complied quietly.
"Good," Josef nodded once, and Mick relaxed.
"You let yourself suffer, prefered it, to just coming to terms with something you don't want.
That's not healthy. You're young, Mick,-"
"Oh, god, Josef," Mick interrupted, groaning in frustration, his temporary intimidation gone. He let his head fall back against the seat again. "Not this again. Please!"
"I'm not finished, Mick."
Mick raised his head at the elder vampire's tone, just as Josef had intended. He glared at Mick until the younger looked properly chastened, then continued.
"I know this changes things with us, Mick. A little. But I'm not understanding why you're having such a hard time with this. It's not like it'll be forever-."
Mick raised his eyebrows at Josef- oh, really?- and Josef read the expression clearly.
"I mean," he amended, " we'll always have this bond, as long as we're both still alive. But not always to this intensity, you know that. Right now you're almost like a new turn- Yes, yes! I know, you're not really a new turn- " he impatiently interrupted Mick's oncoming protest, waving him into silence with a flapping hand- " but you have the reactions and instincts of a new turn. May I continue? Thank you." He had to smother a smile at Mick's surly expression and pouting demeanor. "It's intensity will fade in time. But right now, you could damage yourself emotionally and phsychologically by fighting it too hard while it's needed. I've seen it happen, Mick. The problems abandoned or rejected fledgelings acquire, and it's never pretty. And they're usually terminated before their issues cause more problems, dangerous problems. You've always been your own worst enemy, and I'll be damned if I'm gonna let you endanger yourself for your own selfish reasons!"
Josef's speech had turned into a tirade, and he punctuated the last word with an angry fist slamming into the top of his desk has he sat tensely forward. His eyes were burning with the intensity.
Mick flinched backward into the chair at Josef's anger, but he stubbornly held his ground. "I know it'll fade some, but that will take years. Josef, I could be bound to you with a fledgeling's needs for a good twenty or twenty-five years. Maybe even longer. I know it doesn't always take that long, but sometimes it does. Or what if, God forbid, it never goes away? This is a new situation. Maybe because this is my second turning, it sticks longer, or something. We just don't know."
"No, we don't," Josef replied, calmer. "But what choice do you have but to deal with it? You talk as if you got the short end of the stick out of this deal, but there are life-long repurcussions for me too, you know. Taking on a fledgeling is a big deal. A sire is responsible for so many things. Thank God you don't have to be socialized. But there's still training,-" Mick frowned at that one, and Josef knew his friend didn't even realize what he'd missed in a good
sire- " protecting, mentoring. Even disciplining and monitoring, because a sire is responsible for the actions of his childe and can be held just as accountable if he's found lacking, based on a turn's behavior. I'm now responsible for your well- being, and everything that entails. Forever. It's not an easy thing, Mick. And frankly, it can be daunting. I might not always do what's right, but I'll always have your best interest in mind. And there are going to be times in our long future that I only hope you can remember that when it doesn't seem like it to you. Or when I make mistakes."
Mick looked away, then back at Josef. "I'm sorry. I guess I never thought of it like that. It doesn't make me like it any better right now, though. It's alot to take. I'm trying to change- in just days- the thought processes it took me fifty years to form. It's hard. But I'll try, okay? That's all I can promise for now."
"That's all I ask. For now." Josef made sure Mick was aware of the veiled threat that he would force the issue later, if necessary.
There was an akward silence for a moment then Mick looked across at Josef with a sly grin. "So, the mighty Josef Kostan admits he could make a mistake, huh? That's one for the record."
"That's privelaged information. Don't spread it around."
"I won't anytime soon. I'll add it to my 'possible blackmail ammo' list. It could come in handy for future use."
"Remember, I know where you live."
Mick just gave a little smile. His sleepless days had suddenly and unexpectedly caught up with him and Josef watched as his eyes fought to close against Mick's will. Josef stood up and walked around his desk to reach the other man's seat.
"C'mon," he encouraged the exhausted vampire as he pulled him to a standing position. He moved him over to the couch against the wall and let him flop down. By now Mick was more asleep than awake and he made no protest as he lay stomach down on the leather couch. Josef considered taking Mick to his own freezer, but he figured he'd be okay for a few hours on the couch. His hunger would likely wake him before he could sleep as long as he would really need to anyway. Then Josef would supply him with his meal, then let him sleep some more if he wanted. He could move to a freezer then, if he needed to.
Josef stared for a moment at the figure on the couch, wondering how anyone could hold so much stubbornness and will power, and yet lack common sense so much of the time.
He felt a sudden rush of tenderness toward the younger vampire. He reached down and placed his hand lightly on the back of Mick's head.
"Sleep," he whispered quietly.
Then he stood up and exited the room, glad Mick was not aware of Josef's moment of tender weakness. He'd never live it down.
It would probably be added to Mick's 'possible blackmail ammo' list.

[halfcent]

Chapter Five


Beth

What is up with those two? Something's going on, that much I'm sure of. Mick just keeps saying it's 'vampire stuff', and that I don't need to worry about it. I may not work as a reporter anymore, but I'll alway be one at heart. And nothing gets a reporter's curiosity up more than being told that something's not her business. 'Her' being me. Mick knows me well enough that he should know better. I mean...really.

At first I thought maybe I was imagining it. I mean, it's not like there was anything glaringly obvious. It was mostly just little things, small differences that I started noticing. Taken all together, though, these small nothings became...something. And I simply have to know what it is. Not just for me, of course. For Mick, too. Of course.

It has him all wound up. Mood swings worse than any woman during her 'special' time. No joke. One minute, he's agitated and nervous, then when I see him again later or the next day, he's just fine. Calm, relaxed. And bouts of depression off and on. And besides his sudden moodiness, there's something else. He seems to be having periods of sleeplessness and he's hinted at an occassional lapse of appetite. A bi-polar vampire? I think not. If he were human, that stuff wouldn't be a big deal, but I've learned a few things about vampires by now. And a vampire that has no appetite for blood is definately not normal. So I feel that as his friend and his possible 'something more', it's my duty to do what I can to help him. Right? And if I happen to satisfy my own curiosity at the same time, then so much the better. Right?

At one point, when he became worse than ever, when it lasted five or six days, I really started to worry. He wasn't sleeping or feeding, as far as I could gather, and he actually started to look kind of bad. And that moodiness? Wow. Off the charts. I know vampires suppossedly aren't susceptible to illnesses, but I was starting to wonder. I tried asking him, but he about took my head off. He apologized later, but it was still totally unlike him. And during the bad time, he seemed to be trying to avoid me. Wouldn't take calls or answer the door. And he didn't come to see me, either. I just 'happened' to be hanging around his apartment at one point when he left and then returned, and that's when I saw how bad he suddenly looked. And I was not staking out his place as he is convinced I was. Just hanging out. Near his building. And of course once I followed him up to his place after revealing myself- uh, I mean running into him- he did the gentlemanly thing and let me inside. I can be quite persistant. Unfortunately, he's just as stubborn, and he revealed nothing.

I finally broke down and went to see Josef. I wanted to know what he knew. And if he didn't know anything about it, I figured he should. I thought that at the very least he could help Mick where I couldn't. They have a lot of history.

Of course, he denied knowing that anything was going on with Mick and promised to look into it. I wasn't sure whether to believe him or not, you never know with Josef. That man is cool as ice. But as I said, I'm persistant. I never got him to admit to anything, but after enough pestering he assurred me that he knew Mick was fine, or would be soon. And I'll be damned, but the next day Mick was back to normal. So yeah, he knows something. Then he told me to leave him alone and mind my own business. Since my common sense can occassionally override my tenacity, I left. I have no delusions about my importance to Josef. I know he only tolerates me because he cares about Mick.

Then I sat down with my thoughts. I tried to recollect everything I'd seen or noticed in the past couple weeks. At first, I came to the tentative conclusion that maybe there were problems between Mick and Josef. That would definately affect Mick, close as they are. I did make a connection between Mick's mood swings and his visits to Josef. I'd noticed that he'd been seeing Josef alot more often than he usually made a habit of. Maybe he was busy trying to work things out.

But after thinking about it a little harder, I realized I had the timeline backwards. Mick's moodiness always happenned before his visits to Josef. It was after the visits that Mick seemed to feel better for two or three days. And there was something different, just a little, about the way they interacted with each other now. It was something I'd noticed the few times I'd been with Mick and Josef had appeared or the couple times I'd accompanied Mick to Josef's home or office. But now that I'm consciously thinking about it, I just can't quite put my finger on what it was exactly that I'd seen that was different. What I needed was a chance to observe them together again. That was going to be difficult, though, because after that last bad period Mick had, he'd suddenly become reluctant to let me come with him when he visits Josef. Maybe Josef said something to Mick about my little visit, but if so, Mick hadn't mentioned it. It's like he's trying to keep those two parts of his life separate. The vampire part and then the part that includes me. Like he doesn't want the two halves to collide.

So I really only have one option, right? Ambush Mick and force it out of him.

[halfcent]

Chapter Six


Mick



He had to admit, he's felt much better since that night at Josef's a little over two weeks ago. The night he'd fallen asleep in Josef's office. He'd awakened in a better frame of mind than when he'd first arrived, and the two of them had been able to have their first conflict-free conversation in a while. And somewhere during that conversation, Josef had extracted a promise from Mick that they would get together no less than every three nights, though every two was preferable. He'd actually fallen into the schedule with much less problem than he'd thought he would, sometimes not even skipping a night between visits. And it wasn't really rigid. It was not necessary for Mick to always go to Josef's home. Sometimes he accompanied Josef to his work office, and several times Josef came to Mick's apartment. They'd learned that it was only necessary for them to be together for a few hours for Mick to get what he needed, though he sometimes opted to stay the whole night if he didn't have anything else to do, and it required no effort on either of their parts. Mick just had to be around his Sire, with Josef offering whatever contact he felt Mick might need. They'd both begun to enjoy the companionable time spent together, much more so than even thier friendship filled times of the past.
The only downside was the fresh feeding Josef was insisting on. He'd only made it mandatory twice a week, and Mick had to admit that he felt better for it. Stronger. But he just couldn't get past the feelings of guilt and self-disgust that pervaded him after each feeding. He'd tried re-negotiating with Josef about it, using the fact that it was against his principles as the basis for his argument, but the older vampire had been non- receptive. Mick had decided that for the sake of their newfound accord, that could be a battle for later. For now, everything was as close to normal as it was going to get, certainly the closest thing to normal since the turning. They both valianltly ignored the undercurrent of something not finished, an expectant feeling of waiting for something more that had to happen. There was a slight tension there that both vampires could feel, but it was easily ignored and neither of them ever mentioned it.
The tension that Mick couldn't ignore was Beth. She was adding a whole new stress that Mick was finding hard to deal with while also dealing with these new changes in his life. And he felt guilty for thinking like that. He still liked spending time with her, cared for her more than he'd ever admitted, and they spent time together a few times a week- precious time that Mick cherished. It was just that- she was so damn persistant! And that made it all the harder, having to keep things from her. But Josef had been right when he'd said Beth's knowledge of vampires could be dangerous for her. All it would take was the wrong person- vampire- finding out how much she knew, and Mick would not be able to protect her.
She already knew what she knew, so there was no changing that. The biggest problem was coming from Mick trying to keep her from any further involvement. The woman was pushy, to say the least. But she was his beautiful, pushy woman, and he was determined to discourage her in some way. But that was becoming harder now that she'd begun noticing the changes in him. He didn't want to involve her in all that. Obviously, she knew he'd been turned again, and by Josef, but apparently she didn't know enough to know what that meant for the two men. And since he'd had such a hard time with it, Mick didn't want her to know. He knew she would feel guilt that it had happened so he could rescue her, and he didn't want her to feel any worse about that than he knew she already did. But she'd been pestering him to death about what was wrong with him, and his 'vampire business' explanation had only worked so long before she'd lost patience with it. And for some strange reason, she'd also been bugging him about coming with him when he visited Josef, which he'd been refusing to allow. After Josef's 'request' that he keep Beth out of vampire affairs, Mick decided that keeping her off Josef's radar was a good first step. Unfortunately, she didn't agree. Not that she knew exactly that's what he was doing, but she knew something was up, and she was giving him no peace about it.
In fact, that was what tonight's argument had been about, their worst disagreement yet. And in a roundabout way, the reason he was on his way to Josef right now, even though he'd originally had no plans on visiting tonight. The evening was supposed to have been a nice romantic evening with Beth. They were going to relax, drink wine, talk. Maybe a little more. But she'd just had to start in again with her questions. He'd lost his patience and snapped a time or two, she'd gotten angry and snapped back. Somehow the argument took several different turns and by the end, it wasn't even about what had started it in the first place. Funny how that happens. They'd both said things that he, for one, was now extremely sorry for but had been left unresolved as she'd stormed out and slammed the door.
Hence the desire to be near Josef. Mick had gotten used to the driving need to take comfort from the other vampire on a regular basis, so he'd barely had to think about it when he'd headed out his door for Josef's home, just because he was feeling upset and discouraged. It had happened almost on auto-pilot. His mind had already started making the Pavlovian connection- when Mick was upset, relief was to be found with Josef.
When Mick entered the room he knew Josef to be in, the other man was just donning his suit jacket.
"Hey, Mick. I didn't think you'd be by tonight. Didn't you have some big thing planned with your reporter?"
"Yeah, I did. She's not a reporter anymore, remember?"
"Once a reporter, always a reporter. Nosiness is born, not learned." Josef fastidiously adjusted the sleeves of his jacket over his shirt cuffs, then stilled for a moment and looked up at Mick with a falcon-like gaze. "What's wrong?" he asked the younger vampire.
Mick was suprised. He hadn't realized Josef would sense anything so quickly, but apparently he'd immediately picked up on Mick's downtrodden emotions through thier link. He'd kind of been hoping maybe he could get out of this without having to mention the problems he and Beth were having, but deep down he'd known that was impossible.
To his relief, Josef didn't ask anything about it, just acknowledged that he knew Mick needed him. "Do you want to go to the office with me?"
"Yeah," Mick nodded, grateful for what he knew was only a temporary respite. "For a little while, at least. If it's okay?."
Josef gave him a reproachful look. "Of course it's okay. You should know better than to even ask."
Mick grimaced at the mild chiding. "I know. Sorry."
Josef gave his head an amused little shake and said, "C'mon. I'll drive."






The ride to Josef's office building was quiet, Mick lost in his thoughts and Josef concentrating on the traffic. Suppossedly. But every so often, Mick caught a side-long glance or corner-eyed look that Josef threw in his direction, and he knew Josef would only hold off his curiosity so long. Mick was suprised- and touched- to feel concern mixed in with that curiosity. Josef knew that although Mick's power in this area- feeling the other's emotions across their bond- were not as strong as his own, he knew it was there. So Mick figured that since Josef wasn't hiding his concern from him- a trick he himself had still yet to master- that meant his friend wanted him to know it was there. He couldn't help thinking back to the night he'd felt a rush of tenderness from Josef just as he'd been falling asleep on Josef's couch, followed by a gentle hand on the back of his head. He'd gotten the sense that Josef thought that moment had been confidential, so he'd never mentioned it- he'd even resisted the urge to use it for teasing entertainment- but he'd been touched by the gesture and suprised at the depth of caring coming from his friend, and for that quick moment he'd felt a security unlike any he'd ever known. He wondered if his mentor had always felt like that toward him, or if it was the result of their new....developments.
By the time they'd made it to the building, then through it and up to Josef's office, Mick was just waiting. It was almost funny, actually. Well, it would have been if he hadn't felt so....down. Josef was by no means a shy or timid man, and he'd never had trouble speaking what was on his mind. Especially where Mick was concerned. Yet here Josef was, trying to be....patient. Mick could almost laugh. But then he felt a little apprehensive, realizing that Josef was just feeling his way along. He could sense that Josef was mostly indecisive about how to handle the situation as a whole, how best to deal with specific circumstances that come up. Mick suddenly recognized this, but he pushed down the sudden and unexplainable sense of unease he felt at this new knowledge. For some reason, the idea that Josef wasn't as totally in control as he usually was- or at least made it seem like he was- made Mick feel very insecure.
He seated himself on Josef's office sofa while Josef made himself busy for a few minutes at his desk. Mick ignored the little puttering noises of the computer being turned on and Josef speaking to an employee over his desk intercom. He sat forward on the couch and put his elbows on his knees and rested his chin in his upturned hands. He couldn't get his mind off Beth. He wanted to make things right with her. If only she could just let the whole vampire thing go. Why couldn't she just be satisfied knowing what he was without trying to insinuate herself into that dangerous part of his life? It would make things so much easier, for her and him, and they could be happy like that. Josef had been telling him for months that a relationship between a vampire and a human just couldn't work. Mick was startled to realize that he was wondering if maybe Josef was right. But, no. He wouldn't give up Beth. He wouldn't! He'd work this out somehow. He had to, he couldn't bear the thought of losing her. Hopefully he could figure this out without having to indulge Josef's curiosity too much. Mick now felt the need to be a little more careful about the Beth-related topics when talking to Josef than he used to be, ever since Josef's 'request' that he keep Beth out of vampire business. He was trying, dammit!
He'd been so immersed in his brooding that he was startled when Josef settled himself next to Mick, but on the arm of the sofa rather than on the other side of him on the cushions. He hadn't heard- or felt- Josef approach. Josef's chosen perch put him a little higher that Mick's position, and Mick lifted his chin a litte to look up at his friend.
"Well?" Josef prodded. "Are you going to tell me what has you so bent out of shape tonight?"
"Nothing, really. Just a bad night."
"You know, I can't help but notice that for all the planning you put into this big night with Blondie, it seems to have ended at a rather unnaturally early hour."
"You know her name, Josef."
"You mean it's not Blondie?"
When Mick just glared, Josef momentarily put his hands up, palms forward, in apology. "Okay, okay," he gave in, " all jokes aside, Mick. What's up? I can feel how upset you are, I know something's happened. Is it Beth?"
"She's just so....so...." Mick threw his hands up in frustration, unable to find the right word.
"A woman?" Josef supplied.
"Sometimes I just don't get her."
"You never will. Let me tell you a secret, my friend. Women are not meant to be understood by men. Even when you get to be my age, the understanding of the female phsyche will still be firmly out of your reach. It's just meant to be. Even if you kept the same woman for four-hundred years- Beth for example- you would probably know her very well, but you would still have no hope of understanding the mystery that is Woman."
"Sometimes I just don't know what she wants, what she expects of me."
"Of course not, Mick. It's against their code-" he reached over and laid one had at the base of his dejected friend's neck and massaged the muscles there. That had become their usual practice for the few times Josef had felt Mick needed contact as well as his presence to draw what he needed. "They can't make it easy for us, you know."
"Their code? Their women's code, Josef?" Mick asked in some amusement at Josef's humor.
"Sure," Josef reiterated. He massaged a little harder and included the curve of one shoulder- right where it curves into the neck-in his treatment. He smothered a smile as Mick let his head drop forward at the calming contact he'd needed and the pleasure of the gentle massage. "Women don't want us to know this, but it's like a club, and they're inducted at puberty. I wouldn't be suprised if they have a secret handshake and everything."
"Now you're just being ridiculous," Mick accused, his voice a little muffled. He'd leaned his forehead into his hands, which were again braced on his knees by his elbows, as he'd succumbed to the elder vampire's ministrations.
"You think so?" Josef asked cryptically.
"If it's such a hopeless case, then why do men even bother?"
"You'll know the answer to that when you can tell yourself why you're even bothering. Women have the power, and they know it."
"Sometimes I'm not completely sure it's worth it."
Josef stilled for a moment, then asked "Is that really how you feel?"
Mick moaned in frustration. "No."
"I didn't think so. Listen, Mick, I know I've given you a hard time about the whole 'Beth' thing, and I still don't believe a long-term relationship with a human can work. You two will have to work that part out eventually. But if you care about her as much as I think you do, then let me tell you.... it's worth it. Okay? All the crap that we have to deal with just because we want to be with someone.... it's all worth it if you love her. Remember that."
Mick lifted his head and looked up at Josef. "Is that how you felt about Sarah?" Josef's jaw clenched and for a moment Mick thought maybe he'd overstepped his bounds, but then his friend's face softened.
"Yes," he answered softly. "It's how I still feel about her. I'm just not sure she'd agree, at this point."
"I'm sorry," Mick apologized. "I shouldn't have asked."
"It was a fair question."
"But still...."
"Mick," Josef looked at him with a little smile on his lips, but pain in his eyes. "It's okay. Forget it."
Mick just glanced away. He regretted dredging up his friends sorrows and didn't know what else he could say.
Josef sensed his discomfiture. "Feel better?" Josef asked Mick, diverting his attention back to himself.
"A little," Mick answered, just a little doubtfully.
Josef aborted his massaging motions and gave the back of Mick's neck a reassuring squeeze before removing his hand. "I've got news for ya, buddy. That's about as good as it's gonna get, even with my help. No force in the world can save a man against the complications of a woman. And a word of warning from the experience of a long life; the more in love you are, the more doomed you are."
"Great. Something to look forward to."
Josef chuckled. "It'll be a little while before the conference call I'm waiting on. How 'bout a game of Chess?"
"Sure. I don't know why I bother. You always win."
"Hence, the lessons. In good time, Grasshopper."
"Whatever you say, old man."
"You're a sore loser."
"Only because you're a sore winner."
"Spoiled brat."
"Crotchety old man."
"Set up the board. Are you going to call Beth tomorrow and try to fix whatever you did wrong?"
"I never said I did anything wrong," Mick clarified as he set the chess board on Josef's desk and started moving the pieces around to the correct positions. "Black or white?"
"Black. Of course you did something wrong. Haven't you been listening? Even if you don't know what it was, she does, and before it's over and done with, you'll be the one apologizing."
"How can I apologize If don't know what it is I'm supposed to have done wrong?"
"Oh, she'll let you know what it was, don't doubt that."
"Board's ready," Mick informed, and took his seat in the chair in front of Josef's desk and scooted it closer so he could reach the game board comfortably. Josef walked around the desk and seated himself in his desk chair in front of the black half of the board.
"How about dinner? I planned on ordering in."
Mick froze for a moment, thinking furiously. "I fed before I left my place. Are you gonna move or not?"
"You know white goes first. If you did feed, it wasn't enough. I can tell. And anyway, that packaged crap? I don't see how you stomach it. You'll feel better after something fresh."
That was Josef's standard statement everytime. 'You'll feel better.' But Mick never did. Physically, sure. But emotionally? Nope. Just as bad every time, and tonight Mick just couldn't bear the thought of dealing with that emotional baggage on top of his Beth-issues. "Not tonight, Josef. I can't, okay? Not tonight."
"Twice a week, Mick," Josef reminded him, not giving an inch. "Remember? Your last freshie was Monday, and now it's Friday. It's time."
"I'll come back tomorrow night and feed then, okay? I promise. Just not tonight." Josef didn't look convinced, so Mick pulled out all the stops. "Please, Josef." He tried to look as pathetic as he could, which right now didn't feel like such a stretch.
Josef glanced away, then back at Mick. "You really are a spoiled brat, aren't you?"
Relief flooded through Mick. He knew he'd won this round, and was glad it hadn't turned into a fight.
"Tomorrow night, Mick. You be there."
"I will. Promise." Mick was quick to assure him. He moved his first piece.
"If you try to skip out, I'm coming to get you."
"Got it. I'll be there, Josef."
"You'd think I was asking you to swallow silver or something," Josef muttered in irritation as he studied the board for his first move. "Not just partake in the life-giving sustenance for our kind, which happens to be pleasurable, as well."
Mick stayed silent, knowing better than to respond to the elder's annoyed mutterings. He didn't want to reverse Josef's good will.
Josef made his first move, then looked up from the board. "And remember, Mick. In three days there's another Community gathering at my place. Monday. It's mandatory for every vamp in the city. A couple of new turns are being socialized into the Community, and they're also up for my inspection."
"I know, Josef. How many times are you gonna remind me?" Mick asked half in amusement and half in annoyance. He'd been reminding Mick of the gathering every time he'd seen him for over a week.
"It's important that you be there, Mick."
"I know, Josef. You know, I think you might be going senile. In your old age, and all."
"Spoiled brat."







Before Mick was ready to climb into his freezer for the day he tried calling Beth. He'd waited up a while, knowing that she spent her late nights sleeping now that she had a day job, but she was either still sleeping or already at work and too busy to answer her phone. She wasn't ignoring his call. She wasn't. He reset his alarm near his freezer to wake him up an hour earlier than he'd planned later that day. Maybe he could call Beth- if she'd answer her phone- and they could talk before he had to meet the potential client he'd set up an appointment with in the afternoon.
Unfortunately, that wasn't to be. Still half asleep- it was an early hour for him- he'd called her home phone- knowing she was still probably at work- and her cell phone enough times to be arrested as a stalker and still got no answer. He'd finally had to abandon Operation Beth in favor of his approaching appointment with the pontential client. He promised himself that he'd resume his attempts to reach Beth at the nearest opportunity after his meeting.
His new client turned out to be a distraught father trying to find his daughter, whom he believed to have run away. Mick had to explain to the man that his daughter was not considered a runaway because she was nineteen- no longer a minor. But Mick accepted the job anyway. He made it clear to the thankful father that he would locate the girl and inform the man of her whereabouts, but he would not physically bring her to him. She was a consenting adult, and Mick had no legal right to force her to do anything she didn't want to. It would be up to the man to convince his daughter to come home.
Mick was almost excited about having something to do. He hadn't taken on a job since before the re-turning, having been too occupied trying to deal with the aftermath. But now he thought maybe that had been a mistake. He liked the idea of having something to keep him busy again, something to occupy his mind. And of course he could always use the pay. He wasn't exactly in dire straits, but eternity was a long time. The finances he already had socked away would keep him comfortable for a long time, even if he took a long vacation from working, but it wouldn't last forever unless he kept it growing.
His new case was intriguing, but nothing too out of the ordinary. It was possible the young woman simply ran off with her boyfriend. It seemed the man she'd been seeing had recently quit his job and abruptly left town. That would be the first lead he'd follow up on.
As soon as he'd finished a couple of preliminary phone calls for his new case, he decided he'd forced himself to wait long enough to call Beth. Just as he was about to push redial, the phone in his hand rang. He looked at the caller ID.
Speak of the devil.
Relief flooded through him at seeing Beth's name on the screen.
"Beth?" he answered.
"I saw that you called. Alot. I figured I'd better call you back before you burn up the wires in my phone."
"I was worried....."
She seemed to know what he was trying to say. "I was in meetings all day. I had my phone turned off."
"Oh." He was more relieved than he could say. She hadn't been ignoring his calls. But he also felt a little embarrassed that he'd shown his desperation with so many calls on her caller ID.
"Do you think....we could try it again? We never did get to finish our date last night."
"I'd like to, Mick. I'd like to say yes. But I can't help this feeling....that you don't trust me. And I don't know if I can deal with that."
"What do you mean? Of course I trust you. I never said anything about not trusting you."
"It's not necessarily what you say, Mick. It's just the way you act sometimes. There's a whole part of your life that you won't let me into."
"Because it's a very dangerous part, Beth. I couldn't live with myself if something happened to you."
"I can take care of myself just fine."
"Beth, there's more to it than the little you know about. It's just the way it has to be. Please understand."
Beth was quit for a moment on the other side of the phone, and Mick wondered if she was going to hang up.
"I'll try, Mick. I want to know all of you, not just part of you. But if you're not ready for that yet I'll try to be patient."
Mick was aware that she hadn't promised to give it up for good.
"But it's not just that, Mick. I feel like you're not letting me in. I know something's up with you lately. I'm worried about you, I want to help you. But you won't let me in. You won't talk to me about anything personal. You won't let me help when you're going through bad times. I'm just not quite sure where I fit in."
Mick was about to protest that his personal problems stemmed from 'vampire business',or that she couldn't really help him when he had 'bad times'. But before he spoke, his mind flashed back to the conversation he'd had with Josef last night.
"I'm sorry," he said instead.
"You are?" She sounded suprised.
"Yes. I'm sorry I made you feel like that and I'll try to do better. Okay?"
"Well....okay." she said, sounding happier.
Apparrently, Josef really knew his stuff.
"Sooo...are we good?"
"Yeah, Mick. We're good." She gave a little laugh.
"Do you want to get together? Maybe give last night another try? Whatever you want, Beth."
"I do want to. But unfortunately it's gonna have to wait. I have to go out of town for a couple days for work. But when I get back...."
"Yeah. When you get back.... I'll be here."

[jen]

They will find a way to work through this.

It will be a bit awkward, but this will be fine.

Thank you!

[halfcent]

They have plenty of bumps and curves along the way but eventually it will work out. It's a fun ride to get there though:D

[jen]

Now I would have thought an 85 year old man would have figured out about just apologizing.

Great chapter!

Thank you!

[halfcent]

Haha! You'd think so, right , jen? But then again.....do men ever learn?;)

[halfcent]

Chapter Seven



Mick


The next afternoon, Mick woke early enough that he had time before his vistit to Josef to make a few more phone calls concerning his new case. He'd only stayed at Josef's long enough the night before to drink from the freshie and talk to Josef for awhile. About an hour after dawn, Josef had called and informed Mick that he had something he wanted to speak to him about and he would expect him at the mansion that evening.
Mick was extremely curious, but Josef had refused to discuss whatever it was over the phone. That made him a little apprehensive, as well.
In his client's file, the girl's father had given him a list of his daughter's friends and even some known acquaintances of the girl's boyfriend. As it turned out, he made quite a bit of headway. This was the earliest into a case he'd ever made this much progress so quickly. But most of the people he'd spoken to were eager to help however they could. It seems maybe Dana didn't leave willingly after all, he deduced after hearing several accounts from the girl's friends and the boy's co-workers. Apparently, there had been suspicions of abuse, and it was testified that the young man had a volatile and unpredictable temper.
After following up on a couple leads from Dana's friends, Mick thought he'd found her already. A young man and young woman fitting thier descriptions had checked into a seedy motel in San Diego. But if they had, they'd done it under false names. One of those 'don't ask, don't tell' places, he figured. He would have to see them to make sure it was them, and besides, if she was there unwillingly, she might need help getting away from him. But he didn't think it could wait. It seemed they'd been moving around quite frequently, and if he put it off he might lose the lead. They could move on and he'd have to begin searching again. If she was being abused and forced to stay with him, that was unacceptable. He thought of the girl's worried father, who'd known something wasn't right with his daughter. He knew what he had to do.
Josef's not gonna be happy about this, Mick thought to himself.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Josef


Just as Josef was starting to think he was going to have to call Mick and remind him that he was expecting him, he felt his friend arrive. Moments later he was informed of Mick's arrival by his house employee. Josef could feel Mick's nervousness as he entered the room. At first he put it off as anxiety over the reason he'd asked him to come, but he sensed that wasn't the issue. And Mick had been with Josef for the past two nights, so he knew it was too soon for him to need that kind of attention. Anyway, it didn't feel like that kind of unease. Josef could always tell.
It was something else.
"Mick," Josef greeted.
"Hey, Josef," Mick answered with a nervous little smile.
"I was starting to wonder if I was gonna have to send out a search party."
"Nope. I'm here."
"Good. There's something I want to talk to you about before the Community gathering tomorrow night."
Mick slowly sat in the chair next to Josef's and crossed one ankle over the opposite knee. The casualness he was trying to pull of with this pose was betrayed when his ankle began to jiggle nervously. He seemed oblivious to this tell.
"Okay," Mick agreed. "But there's something I need to talk to you about, too."
Well. Apparently he wouldn't have to wait to find out what had Mick so wound up.
"Okay," Josef said curiously. " You first. Shoot."
Mick licked his lips nervously and opened his mouth to speak, then closed it again.
"I could use dinner," he announced abruptly. "Have any good choices waiting for a call?"
Josef wasn't sure what he'd been expecting Mick to say, but it wasn't that. "Wait a minute. Not that I'm going to knock any instant progress, but you want a freshie? Without me practically forcing you?"
"Sure," Mick shrugged one shoulder. "Why not?"
Josef's curiosity drifted into suspicion. What's this all about?
"Not hungry? That's fine. How about a chess game? The lessons are getting interesting." Mick's tone was nervous and eager.
Josef suddenly came to the conclusion that Mick was playing him. Or trying to. He was using tactics he'd thought would appease Josef, to soften whatever blow he was about to deliver.
Yep. His young friend was up to something.
Josef settled himself more comfortably against the back of his seat. He settled his elbows on the arms of the plush chair and intertwined the fingers of one hand with the other and rested both hands casually across his stomach. He let put a stony expression on his face, and he saw Mick swallow nervously. The younger vampire knew the game was up.
Josef was a master at intimidation.
"Spill it, Mick."
"I picked up a case."
"Okay..."
"Well....I'm gonna have to go out of town. To San Diego."
Josef frowned. "I'm not sure that's such a good idea, Mick."
"I should only be gone two or three days."
Is this what he'd been worried about? Telling him he had to go out of town? San Diego wasn't t too far, it could be workable. "I guess you should be fine if you spend the evening before you leave here with me, and come to me immediately on your return. San Diego's not too far. If you think you'll need to stay longer, you could always come back for a night and then return the next evening to do whatever it is you do on a case. But remember, Mick. We don't want a repeat of what happened to you a couple weeks ago."
Josef had had passing worries about what would happen when Mick felt the need to regain as much independence as he could. Mick was not a completely new turn. He'd already had a life in place and his own career before he'd been re-turned. Josef knew they'd have to come to some kind of compromise. If Mick had been a true infant, he would not be allowed out of Josef's supervision for a good while, but thank goodness that wasn't the case. They both knew now that Mick was strongly dependant on Josef now for an indeterminate amount of time, but neither of them wanted Mick to have to give up his lifestyle just because it.
Mick nodded eagerly. "I know, Josef. I'll be careful."
But Josef still heard nervousness in Mick's voice. There was more.
He waited a moment to see if Mick would offer the rest willingly, but he didn't seem so inclined. "When will you be leaving?"
Mick hesitated, then... "Soon."
Josef now had an idea where this was going. He narrowed his eyes and speared Mick with a glare. "How soon?"
Mick squirmed a little under the intense gaze, then said, "I planned on going tonight, but I'd never get there before dawn. I'm leaving early tomorrow evening."
Josef's glare turned sterner. "No. You're not."
"Josef, I have to. It's my job, people are depending on me."
"People are depending on you around here, too, Mick. Are you forgetting about the Community meeting tomorrow night?"
"I haven't forgotten, but... is it really so important that I be here?"
"You really have the nerve to ask me that?"
"What do you expect me to do? My client's counting on me. I promised to find his daughter for him, she might be in a bad situation."
"You've known me for a long time, Mick. You know by now that I don't care about the plight of humans. I'll tell you what I expect you to do. I expect you to either forget it altogether or put it off until after tomorrow night, but you're not going anywhere until after the meeting."
"Why are you being such a hard ass about this, Josef? It's not that big a deal!"
"I'll tell you why. The reason I wanted to talk to you tonight. Some elders- and not just yours, Mick, my elders too- have become interested in our.... situation. They're going to be here tomorrow night and they want to meet you."
"I don't care about them."
"Well you'd better. These aren't the kind of people to ignore. You don't want to be on their bad sides, and I'm certainly not going to let you put yourself there so you can run off and play hero."
"Well they can be interested in our situation without me here! Turn on the charm, Josef, you'll keep them entertained enough for both of us."
Josef ignored the sarcastic barb and stood up gracefully from his seat. Out of an instinctive sense of self-preservation, Mick hastily exited his own seat and retreated a couple steps from Josef, then stopped.
Josef laughed to himself. Seems the boy has some common sense, after all. He stopped a couple feet from Mick and stared at him until he looked away. When he next spoke it was with false calm. "You are going to be here, Mick. You're going to make yourself presentable and appear for their inspection like a good little vampire. Just like I am. You are not leaving town."
Mick threw up his hands and heaved a frustrated sigh. "Josef! You can't just.....Dammit! Do you see?! Do you see now why I'm having a hard time with this? I don't need someone monitoring my every move! And I don't need someone else that takes heat if I do something wrong! I just want things back to normal. It's not fair!"
"There's no such thing as fair, Mick. It is what it is. And this is our normal now. Get used to it." As much as Josef cared about the younger vampire- and those feelings had multiplied a hundredfold since he'd turned him back- he was tired of coddling him. He was going to have to face reality sooner or later.
Mick stared at Josef for a second, looked away, then back. A little calmer. "I'm not so sure I can, Josef."
Josef's heart gave a sympathetic tug for his friend as he heard the almost plaintive tone in his voice.
"I mean, think about it, Josef. Think about it happening to you. Imagine being bound to someone all over again, but without losing your age, experience or power. It's even more restricting than the first time, because age-wise, I need it less. It's like....like... like an adult being made a child all over again, while still being an adult on the inside. You've got to give me some leeway here."
"Leeway I don't have a problem with, Mick. But you have to make concessions, too, you know. Even before the turning I would have expected you to be at an important meeting, and you would have had no problem doing as I ask. It's the change in our relationship you're fighting. You admitted as much yourself last time we had this discussion. It's just when you don't get your way that you suddenly have problems with it. Well, Mick, the circumstances under which things have changed are unique, but the nature of the change is not, and you know it. It's in our nature, and part of vampire society. Being your sire dictates that regardless of how good or bad our relationship, there will be times you'll have to answer to me or that I have to make decisions that are best for you, or on your behalf. And there will be times you'll seek me out for answers, as well. It's a give and take relationship. You've always called me your mentor, Mick. This is just a few steps higher in that direction."
Josef paused in his winded speech to see if Mick had anything to respond with. Mick just glared, no response forthcoming, so Josef hardened his face and his voice and continued.
"But all that aside, Mick. We've talked those issues to death, and it's an argument for another time. You're acting like a pouting teenager because you can't have your way. You have to be at the meeting tomorrow night. We both do. That's all there is to it."
Silence. Mick just stared. Then, through gritted teeth, he growled out, "Fine."
Mick spun on his heel and headed for the door.
"I mean it, Mick," Josef called out to his friend's retreating back. He felt that, given Mick's usual stubbornness, the younger vampire had given up much too easily. "If I find out you try to go anywhere, you'll never get past the city limits before I bring you back."
Mick just waved a backward hand at him before he disappeared into the hall, but Josef didn't know if it was in angry dismissal or acknowledgement of his threat.
Now alone, Josef let himself flop down and sprawl back in one of the room's comfortable chairs. He felt wrung out, these little battles with Mick took a lot out of him.
Great, he thought. Another crisis in the Mick St. John saga.
He shook his head, wondering if he was just going about this all wrong. He wondered if Mick was testing him in some way. Only Mick could make him doubt himself.
"Kids," Josef Kostan muttered in frustration.



----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mick

Mick was right. Josef hadn't been happy. But now neither was Mick. He didn't like the idea of possibly losing the lead on his case by waiting two days before doing anything about it, but it looked like he didn't have much choice. Josef always followed through on his threats and probably already had someone keeping an eye on Mick by now. Mick knew Josef really would have him brought back. And as much backbone as Mick usually had standing up to Josef when he felt the need to, that was not an encounter he would care to experience.
But what bothered him even more than that was the fact that much of what Josef said had struck a nerve. Lately, that was kind of how he'd felt whe he was around Josef. Like a teenager waiting for approval from an admired adult. And Mick knew that some of that was their new bond, but he didn't have to like it. And as much as he'd like to blame Josef for their arguments, Mick was aware that they usually started with himself. But if Josef would just stop treating him like a newborn fledgeling, then Mick wouldn't have a problem.
He tried to push down the creeping thought that he really knew Josef was doing his best balance it all out.
No. Mick was going to have to get it across to Josef somehow. Obviously, talking- or fighting- didn't work. It was time for a little more....aggression.
Another disturbing thought- he really was starting to sound like a pouting teenager. No, he told himself. Don't go there. Focus. How to show Josef how I really feel? And maybe get him back in the process.
Let's see. What would bother Josef the most? For Mick to stay away would surely affect him. But no. It would affect Mick, too, in a bad way, and anyway, he wasn't looking for something that would damage their relationship. Just something that would make Josef uncomfortable, make him take notice. What kinds of things did Josef care about? Appearances, for sure. His reputation.
Perfect.
And tomorrow night's vamp gathering at Josef's place would be the perfect time, too. It was mandatory for every vampire in the Community to be there, and there would also be the Elders Josef was talking about. Mick let a small, excited smile cross his face as he pulled up in front of his building. This could be fun.
He wasn't quite sure yet what he was going to do, but the obvious first start would be with Mick himself. Now that he was Josef's fledgeling, his actions would reflect back upon the older vampire.
The tiny little thought that maybe this wasn't such a good idea tried to push it's way forward, but he shoved it as far back as he could and continued planning.
Oh, yeah. This could really be fun.

[halfcent]

Chapter Eight


Mick

Let the games begin, Mick thought as he pulled up to Josef's mansion at the appointed time. He was the first guest to arrive, if you could even call Mick a guest, but Josef had left a message on Mick's voicemail 'requesting' that he be there at a specified time before anyone else was due to arrive. He got a strange look from the security man that opened the door when Mick stashed the duffel bag he was carrying in a back corner of the room, but he just smiled at the man and headed upstairs on his own. Josef's staff knew him well enough by now to know he was eccentric, but a friend, and no danger to their employer. As if Josef needed protection, anyway.

Mick didn't have a concrete plan in mind, but he had a few good ideas. Some of it was going to depend on how the evening went. He would just play it by ear. He chuckled to himself in anticipation, then he wondered if this was how Josef felt when planning someone's demise. Somehow, added to the wish to do something simple to show Josef how angry he was, there was now a childish sense of mischief. He just had to remember to play it cool. If he let's his nerves get ahead of him Josef will know, and that will put an end to the fun before it even begins. And that will never do.

Mick followed his 'Josef-sense' until he found the room the other man was in. He gave a little tap on the door and walked in, giving a little nod as Josef turned from the window to face him.

He knew he was there for inspection. Josef is a clothes-hound, and is forever critiqueing Mick's choices of apparrel. Mick had known that for such an occassion, Josef would want to approve- or at least see- what he had chosen to wear. It wasn't quite as formal as Josef's extremely expensive suit, but Mick's slacks, shirt and blazer-type jacket should pass.

Mick stood still as Josef eyed him critically and nodded in approval of his choice. But then Josef frowned a little and gave a long-suffering shake of his head and strode forward.

"Honestly, Mick. Do you sleep in your clothes?"

Mick was used to this familiar routine and just rolled his eyes a little as Josef proceeded in his task. He adjusted Mick's collar and straightened his lapels. Then he brushed the shoulders and ran his hands down the sleeves of the blazer smoothing imaginary wrinkles, giving each cuff a tug before he stepped back, satisfied. And just like every time, Mick had an instant flashback of his own mother performing the very same ritual when he was a child. Every Sunday morning before church. He smirked a little but quickly made it disappear as Josef glanced up at him. He didn't think Josef would appreciate the comparison.

"What's funny?" Josef asked curiously, having sensed Mick's humor.

"Nothing," Mick answered quickly. "Just a passing thought. Private joke."

"Glad to see you're in better humor than you were last night."

"I have a whole new outlook tonight. Don't they say 'life is what you make it' ? I have a feeling tonight's gonna be better than I thought."

Josef stepped back and looked at Mick appraisingly, then nodded slowly. "Wow. I'm impressed, Mick."

Mick just blinked at Josef in suprise. This was unexpected. "Impressed?"

"Yes." Josef laid a hand on Mick's shoulder and gave a little squeeze. "And for what it's worth, I'm proud of you."

"You are?" Damn. Any other time Mick would bask in the glow of hearing Josef say something like that to him, but given his current plans, it just made him feel the first little niggles of guilt.

"Sure. This is a complete turnaround. It says to me that you're trying. I can't ask for more than that."

Great. There was no way he could follow through on his little game now. Josef said he was impressed. He was proud of him. Why does he do this to him? The thought of doing something that would disappoint Josef now was unthinkable. Mick let the idea of the night's fun disintegrate. And strangely, he had no problem with it. The moment he no longer had a reason to feel guilty, that coveted glow of pleasure at having given Josef a reason to be proud of him arrived. Mick stood up a little straighter in pride.

"Thanks, Josef. That means alot." He valiantly put out of his head the knowledge that it hadn't been honestly earned.

"You're welcome. And I mean it. I knew it wouldn't take long if you just took the time to think about what I said."

Think about what he...? What? "What do you mean?"

"I was worried when you went off in a huff. I thought you might let your anger get in the way of taking sound advice. Especially my sound advice. You weren't too receptive last night, you know."

"I was mad," Mick excused lamely in distraction. What is Josef trying to say here?

"That's okay, Mick. Like I said before, we won't always agree on what's best. But it'll all work out fine when you understand that I only want what's best for you."

"Sooo...as long I listen to you, everything'll be okay." Mick clarified flatly. Who the hell does he think he is?

Josef smile broadly, his serious moment gone. "You're a quick learner, Mick."

Mick was aware that this last from Josef was meant to be a joke, maybe even in response to the irritation Josef might be feeling from him- maybe trying to lighten the mood, but Mick didn't care. He didn't like the inference that Josef knew best, Josef was always right, and all happiness could be found if Mick just did what Josef decided was best. God. Sometimes Josef can be such an arrogant ass.

He also wasn't comfortable with this new sense of bitterness and worried about where it might be coming from, but in his present frame of mind he decided it didn't matter right now. Not so much as putting Josef in his place a little, anyway.

Screw guilt. Game time.


Josef


Josef didn't like the idea of these Elders being so interested in Mick. It's not that he really thought they were a danger, it was more the perception of danger. They were accorded respect because of their age, power and station, but... they were on his turf, in his territory. And he couldn't help that protective, possessive feeling that they might be a threat to something that was his. He'd wanted to warn Mick to stay close by, where Josef could see him and keep an eye out on him, but he knew Mick would resist that with everything he was worth. Especially given that surge of anger he'd felt from Mick right before Josef had been informed of his first guests arriving. He was still confused as to where that had come from, what had prompted it. He'd have persued it if they'd had time, but it was time for him to play the gracious host.

He had a feeling the the Elders were more than just interested. He thought they might have been sent to 'inspect' Mick much as Josef would be inspecting the two new fledgelings here tonight. But he didn't really know what they might be looking for. When Josef inspects new vampires in his community, he's making sure they're being socialized and controlled, that they're adjusting okay, and that they seem to have no tendecies torward going feral. But being that Mick's not really new, those concerns don't apply to him.

"Good evening, Mr. Kostan."

Josef turned at the cultured, slightly accented voice that had spoken his name. Speak of the devil...well, devils.

The three attending Elders stood together facing Josef, and he couldn't help but think of a judging panel. "Good evening," Josef replied in kind. "I do hope you're enjoying yourself."

"Yes. Lovely place, by the way," replied the same one that had spoken Josef's name. Josef knew all three, vaguely. He'd had a few encounters with them over his four centuries, but had never had much occasion to get to know them too well. The only one to have spoken thus far was going by the name Nigel. Josef did remember that he'd never cared much for that one. A little on the short side, though just a little shorter than Josef himself, and slightly pudgy, he'd always reminded Josef of a middle-aged business man. He was a little over seven hundred years old, by his own reckoning, and had never said exactly where he'd come from. But he still spoke in a highly stiff English accent, and he carried himself with that 'better-than-you' pompous attitude that one might imagine came from an English butler with delusiouns of grandeur.

The vampire next to him, the one in the middle, Josef knew as Malcolm. He was a powerful vampire, and the oldest among the three at almost a millenium. Josef could feel the power radiating off of him, and he was given plenty of space by all the other guests. He was humorless, with a stern countenance. And his appearance supported that, his tall, lean form, and his shoulder length black hair slicked back and held with a piece of leather at the back. It was his eyes that showed his true soul, though. There was a cruelty there, moreso than anything Josef had ever known. Where Nigel fancied himself better than everyone around him, Malcolm knew it. There was something in his eyes that said he had love for no one, and he saw no being as his equal. His fellow vampires were almost as far under him as their food source, the humans. If there was ever anyone Josef Kostan had ever met that he would admit a fear of, it was this one.

The last of the Elders was tall with shining ebony skin, and dark kinky curls close to his head. Josef knew him only as Rake. He was the second eldest at around nine-hundred years. He had the same powerful aura as Malcolm, due to his age, which was barely under Malcolm's, but he was missing the high level of menace that was present in his counterpart.

"I see you've welcomed two new fledges into your community, Josef. How does it look?" Rake's voice was rich and deep, matching the color of his skin. His tone was less condescending than Nigel's had been, even as he used Josef's first name rather than his last as Nigel had.

"It looks good for the the young lady. She seems to be adjusting well. Time will tell with the other. He has a wife and children he's left behind and he's having trouble adjusting. I promised his sire a little more time to see if she could get him to adjust before a decision is made, so long as he makes no stupid mistakes like trying to contact his family."

"A fair decision," Rake approved.

"A bit too lenient, if you ask me," Nigel huffed. "If they can't let their past go from the beginning, it will never happen. Terminate him now and you will save yourself plenty of trouble later."

Malcom said nothing, simply stared at Josef with a look in his eyes that Josef couldn't decipher, but it was a look he didn't like. It was almost a humorous look, like he found something funny and was laughing to himself but wouldn't deign to share the joke. As Josef met the vampire's eyes, Malolm slid one corner of his mouth up into a smirk. He gave one curt nod of the head and turned, walking away without a word as Josef stared at his back.

"You'll have to forgive our companion," Rake said. "He's a man of few words."

"Hmph. Among other things," Nigel added, but Josef noted that it was said quietly enough to prevent it being heard by Malcolm's retreating form.

Before Josef could respond, another of the guests, Alexander Chisolm, approached Josef from behind and clapped him on the back.

"Well, Kostan, I guess congratulations are in order." Alex grabbed Josef's hand and pumped it in a handshake.

Alex was a vampire close to Josef in age, in fact, he would likely be the Community Elder if Josef hadn't been there, but Josef and he had a bit of a strained relationship for that very fact. Alex was considered second in the community and as such could easily share some of Josef's responsibilities, but Alexander Chisolm doesn't like second. If it wasn't for that, they might have very well been friends. Alex had a very open and easy going personality.

And now Josef stared at the other vampire in confusion. "Congratulations?" he asked.

"Sure. But I never thought you'd do it. And it's brave, really. I mean, the girl was one of you freshies. I suppose there's nothing wrong with it, marrying a freshie, but the fact that you want her to stay human is suprising. I'd have figured you'd turn anyone you consider to be wife material."

"What?" Josef could only stare in shock, his usual cool decorum having fled for the moment.

"Listen, I know you didn't want anyone else to know yet, but since I found out I just wanted to extend my congrats. And no one will hear it from me until you're ready to announce it. I'll let you get back to your other guests. Gentlemen." And with that Alex wandered off to another group he spied across the room. He just knew they'd love to hear the suprising news.

"Well. Congratulations, Josef."

"No," Josef answered Rake, still in confusion. "No, there's no congratulations. I'm not getting married."

"No?"

"No. I'm not sure where Alexander got that information, but I intend to find out."

"Hmm. A rumor, perhaps."

"Maybe," Josef answered a little doubtfully. Alex had seemed too confident about the news for it to have been heard as gossip.

"We'll talk some more later, Josef. It would not do for us to monopolize the host."

"Yes," Josef agreed distractedly, and barely noticed when his two elders wandered away.

Josef mingled himself into the crowd, putting that strange encounter to the back of his mind, and played the perfect host, meeting, greeting, conversing and mingling.

But from then on, he had many more strange encounters that he couldn't explain. A couple of the attending Cleaners cornered him and wanted to know what was up with his assumption that they were not doing their jobs well enough to suit him. Several of his business clients accosted him with the worried assumption that he was dismantling his current business, without informing them, and might be ready to make off with the exorbiant about of their own money they'd entrusted him with. He recieved several more congratulations on his mysterious upcoming marriage. He had a tense encounter with Ryder, in which the younger vampire pleaded for Josef to give him one more chance to prove himself useful as a tech before Josef found himself someone else to do the job.

Josef had no answers for any of them, only protests. Where were these people getting all this?

After about an hour of these strange encounters, Josef finally began getting some answers. Well, one answer, really. One that he'd found hard to believe at first. Mick St. John. It seemed Mick had begun his own little rumor mill. Josef was stunned to hear that he'd been the source of these unreputable murmurings, until he remembered some of Mick's recent behavior and some of the vibes he'd gotten from the younger vampire. Seems Mick is on a mission of revenge. That little demon! Now, where is he?

During his search of his wayward fledgleing- in which so far Mick had been successful in evading him because Josef had to constantly stop and make nice with his guests-Josef found himself once more approached by the Elders. He was relieved to note that it was only two of them. Malcolm was not among them.

"Josef. We met young Mick," Rake informed him without preamble on their approach.

"Crass young thing, he is," Nigel snorted in derision.

Josef frowned. That didn't sound like Mick at all. True, he's not as polished as Josef, but Mick has no problem being personable when the occassion calls for it. But then again, Mick was quite out of character tonight. An event that would not be ignored, Josef vowed.

"Rather disrespectful, really," Nigel continued indignantly. "It's easy to see that fledgeling has had no discipline."

Josef drew himself up straight at the assumption that he was wanting in his job as a sire. "I hope you'll excuse him. We had a bit of a disagreement last night. He seems to be perfecting his own brand of rebellion." It about killed Josef to have to make apologies to this vampire, with his overblown sense of superiority, but he was an elder.

"Rebellion would not exist if the correct discipline were in place. It's easy to see this one needs a heavy hand. Perhaps you were not yet ready to have sired."

Josef said nothing, just clenched his jaw. Nigel just nodded his head knowingly, then said, "If you'll excuse me, gentlemen. I think I'll go see where Malcolm has disappeared to."

Josef and Rake both watched Nigel depart, then Rake turned back to Josef. He couldn't help but think - judging by his expression as he'd watched Nigel walk away- that Rake didn't care much for the English- sounding vampire either.

"So tell me, Josef," Rake began. "Mick is your first?"

Josef thought of Sarah. He certainly couldn't tell Rake about her, and anyway, to be truthful, he'd never experienced the Sire/fledgleling connection with Sarah, thanks to her condition.

"Yes," Josef answered mostly truthfully. "He is."

"This is quite a unique case. No other vampire has ever been turned twice."

Josef did not speak, worried for a moment how much he should say. He didn't want Mick in danger.

But Rake seemed to guess his feelings and smiled a little. "Have no fear, Josef," he assured with a little humor. " The council has been aware of Mick St. John for quite a while now. We are quite gratified of the new circumstances. Coraline did not do him justice as a sire, and it is believed that Mick's self-hatred stemmed from departing from her too soon. Though the fiasco with the temporay 'cure' for vampirism was a bit worrying, we are seeing this as a second chance for young Mr. St. John. And you are to be credited. It is believed that the only reason Mick did not suffer the usual bad effects of an orphan is because you took him under your wing these many years until you turned him again."

Well. That was suprising.

"However," Rake continued, and Josef knew there'd be more. "As tiresome as Nigel can sometimes be, he is correct in one thing. For Mick's own safety, you must get a handle on him."

"It's a little complicated," Josef protested. "Mick a very good friend, and had been before I turned him back. He's resisting the new relationship."

"That is not altogether new, Josef, and no excuse. Many vampires are turned by lovers or friends, as you well know. I myself am the sire of nine, two of whom I had very close relationships with before I turned them."

"I'm just not sure what's right for him. I don't want to make things worse."

"But you are, by not doing what is needed. You are half my age, Josef, but you are old enough to remember how things used to be handled by sires, and still are by the old ones. But today's new turns were brought up in a time when it is believed such discipline is abuse. It is not necessary to do things the old way, Josef. You do not have to be cruel or abusive. You will find your own way. But you must command his respect. Not demand it, but command it. There is a difference there. To demand his respect, you would simply be forcing him into it, but to command his respect, you would be teaching him that he wants to. It would be a feeling within him, and you would have earned it."

"The biggest issue is that Mick's not a newborn," Josef explained. "He doesn't really need the same kind of care that a new turn requires."

"Ah, but he does, Josef. He does not require the same constant supervision, but he craves the same attention."

"He sure doesn't act like it," Josef responded in slight irritation.
"And that is your failing," Rake said, not unkindly. "I have been observing him. He needs things he does not even realize. Some of the things he feels, but does not want to fears this new dependence. It is your job to supply what he needs whether he wants it or not, or thinks he needs it or not. Has his personality changed at all?"

Josef looked up in alarm at the veiled meaning in this question. "A little," Josef admitted hesitantly. Rake nodded at him to continue. "He's become a bit more irritable than usual, less easy going. It doesn't take much to set him off these days."

Rake nodded knowingly. "Under the circumstances, Josef, it is believed that Mick could easily go feral at what might seem to be the rejection by his new sire. I know you are not actively rejecting him, but the fledgeling inside him doesn't realize that. You have been negligent in your duty as a Sire, Josef."

Josef flinched at the proclamation, suddenly realizing the truth. "What can I do to change it?" he asked, bowing to the voice of experience.

"I think you know, Josef. Am I correct in assuming that you have not yet asserted your dominance as his Sire?"

"No," Josef admitted. "Not really. I was afraid that it would damage him more if he wasn't ready."

"He was ready the moment you turned him. Now it is imperative. I suggest, for both your sake's but especially Mick's, that you take that step as quickly as possible. He will fight it, likely, or perhaps try to manipulate you out of it- he is stronger than a new turn- but you must persevere and follow through. Simply allow your instinct take over and you will know what to do. As will he, when he gives in to his own instincts. All will be well. I am going to guess that Mick has not verbally acknowledged that you are his sire?"

Josef shook his head negatively. Now that he thought about it, they'd discussed it, and he knows Mick knows it intillectually, but Mick had never acknowledged the fact, really. Josef was pretty sure Mick had never even said the word 'sire' in any of their conversations.

"That is one of his coping tactics, Josef. He feels that if he doesn't acknowledge it, maybe it doesn't exist. That should be your first step."

"Thank you, Rake. This has been a valuable conversation." Josef had a new respect for this older vampire, and his wisdom.

"You're welcome." Rake paused, then cocked his head a little, his glance flicking to some distance over Josef's shoulder. "It seems your Mick is rather more dressed down than he was when I encountered him earlier."

Josef turned and gave a double take at the picture Mick presented. In place of his former passable attire, he was now wearing an old pair of jeans- faded, dirty and torn-, a black t-shirt with the logo of some obscure heavy metal band, worn, dirty tennis shoes, and a folded- thin bandanna wrapped around his head ninja-style. What the...? The complete costume was grossly out of place for such a formal gathering, and Mick was recieving many looks of derision and amusement. And there were just as many fearful glances in Josef's direction in anticipation of his reaction, as well as a few head shakes at the behavior of his childe.

"Excuse me," Josef said tightly to Rake with a last respectful nod.

Josef made a bee-line for Mick's position, vowing that this time nothing would prevent him from reaching his target.



As Rake watched Josef hurry off to save face, he was joined by his two comrades that had been waiting nearby.

"You spoke to him?" Malcolm asked.

"Of course. He recognizes his mistakes. He is young. He will learn."

"We shall see."

"He will do what's right."

"I'm not so sure," Nigel added stuffily as the other two looked at each other in sufferance of their companion. "I don't think he has it in him."

"Josef Kostan is not to be underestimated. Everything will be fine."

"We shall see," Malcolm said again.



Mick was having the time of his life. He'd loved watching the reactions of his fellow vampires at the 'rumors' of the very public Josef Kostan. He'd loved even more the look on Josef's face when confronted with these rumors, the couple times he'd risked staying near enough to see it. This was the perfect plan. Maybe it would make Josef sit up and take notice. Maybe it would make Josef think twice next time he felt the need to treat Mick as if he didn't know how to run his own life. The wardrobe change was the coupe de grace.

He'd had a couple moments of panic when he'd realized that Josef had discovered his little game earlier, but he'd managed to keep ahead of him long enough have a little more fun and change his clothes. Oh, he knew he'd have to pay the piper later. He knew he wouldn't get away with this indefinately, but for now the only thing that mattered was 'the lesson'. He'd worry about everything else later.

Even now, as he was speaking with a couple of freshies about the possibility of Josef converting to only packaged blood (not true of course, but their stricken expressions said they believed him) he spied Josef headed his way with single-minded intensity and murder in his eyes.

Uh oh. Time to skedaddle. Inevitable or not, he'd much rather deal with the consequences of the night's fun after Josef had a chance to calm down and see the humor in it himself.
Yeah. That'll happen.
Mick bid the ladies a hasty farewell and headed off, trying to disappear amongst the other guests. He knew Josef could track him easily by using their link, but earlier Josef had been distracted by the other guests and Mick hoped that would work again. In fact, judging by the expression that had been on Josef's face, Mick thought maybe calling it a night would be the best thing. He could leave early and call Josef tomorrow.

Maybe this hadn't been such a good idea.

He threw a glance behind him to note Josef's progress and was suprised and relieved to discover that he seemed to have lost him. He smiled to himself in satisfaction...

...and then his feet flew out from under him as a harsh grip on the back of his neck stopped his forward momentum just as he entered the foyer.

He landed hard on the flat of his back. He blinked up at the terrifying sight above him.

"Uh... hi, Josef." He gave a weak smile that lasted only a moment before it slid off his face. Josef looked anything but happy.

"Stand up," Josef ordered. Mick's eyes widened a little. The tone of Josef's voice made Mick want to do nothing more than to stay right where he was and sink into the floor, safely out of his friend's reach.

Mick stood up slowly, backing away just a little as Josef remained immovable, refusing to give the younger vampire the personal space he would need to stand up withought colliding with Josef. On the way to his upright position, Mick ran through several possible things he could say to appease the older vampire, but he was not given the chance to voice even one.

The moment he was up, Josef reached out swiftly and again caught the back of Mick's neck in a harsh hold. Mick couldn't help his little grunt of pain. Josef used that hold to pull Mick the rest of the way to his feet, then pulled him close. He pulled Mick's head down a couple inches to accomodate for Josef's shorter stature as he spoke into Mick's ear.

"Having fun?"

"Immensely," Mick responded in an unwise flash anger that was gone before the word had even completely left his mouth.

Josef squeezed just a little harder, and this time Mick's grunt of pain bordered on a whimper, and he immediately wished he'd kept his mouth shut. It would take a vampire much stronger than himself to remain stoic under such force. And besides, this is Josef. Mick had taken on many vampires older and more powerful than himself- even when he should've known better. Sometimes he'd won and sometimes he hadn't. But Mick would never actively fight Josef, he couldn't bring himself to, and instinctively he knew that was one battle he'd be on the losing end of, anyway.

Josef brought his mouth a little closer to Mick's ear. "I think we need to have a little talk, Mick. Why don't you go up to the study and wait for me to excuse myself to my guests."

"It seems to me we've talked enough, Josef." Damn. Why can't I just learn to keep my mouth shut?

"You're right, Mick," Josef said thoughtfully. "We have done enough talking. It's time for another approach. Go. Upstairs."

Mick's brow wrinkled and Josef sensed his uncertainty. He tightened his grip yet a little more. Mick groaned just a little in the back of his throat, and tried to shift position subtly to lessen the pain just a little, but Josef's fingers were like iron. "If you insist on making a scene, Mick, I'll drag you up there kicking and screaming. Is that what you want?"

"No."

"No? Does that mean you'd like to hold on to your dignity and walk up there on your own?"

"Yes."

"Yes?"

"Yes, Josef."

"Then go now," Josef growled and gave Mick a little shake. "Before I change my mind and drag you up there in front of everyone like a misbehaving child."

Josef dug his fingers into the muscles of Mick's neck to get his point across and Mick stiffenned at the pain in his already abused muscles. When Josef finally let go, Mick almost moaned in relief. He almost thanked him. Instead he spun on his heel and quickly headed for the stairs before Josef did indeed change his mind.

When Mick reached the room Josef had specified, he entered and shut the door behind him. He had the irrational urge to lock it so he only had to deal with Josef from the other side. But of course that wouldn't work. Damn. His neck and shoulders still hurt, the deep bruises on his muscles not having faded yet. And yet, he knew he'd been fortunate. Josef had been angry, but did not want to hurt him. Not like he would to someone he truly meant harm to. For vampires, with their accelerated healing and superior strength, such treatment is painful, attention getting, but not damaging. Mick had seen many young vampires treated in such a way, and harsher ways, for the sake of discipline. He knew that had been Josef's aim, and he was aware that it could have been worse. There are many ways to cause pain without causing damage, and he would bet Josef knew every one of them. Mick thought maybe he'd let the 'game' get too out of hand. Maybe he'd better just suck it up and apologise when Josef got up there.

His mind made up, he stood up straight as he felt Josef's approach. Josef entered and, with his back to Mick, shut the door softly. Mick waited for Josef to face him before he said anything, but he had no chance to speak.

When Josef turned to him, it was with a predatory hiss and Mick's eyes widened in more than suprise when he saw that Josef had changed to show his vampire face. Mick was too stunned to even move as Josef flew at him faster than the eye could follow.

[halfcent]

Chapter Nine



Josef


Josef flew at Mick, noting with satisfaction the younger vampire's surprise and sudden fear. He pinned Mick hard against the wall and brought his face close to Mick's, growling deep in his throat.

"Get off me! Let go! Josef, let go!"

Mick tried removing Josef's hands from their grip, wrapped tightly around the neckline of that noxious t-shirt. But Josef's grip was like a vise and Mick's efforts were in vain.

"Quiet," Josef growled fiercely, pulling him away from the wall just a couple inches then pushing him back, letting him hit the wall just hard enough to get his attention.

Mick obeyed, eyes wide. "Put your hands down," Josef ordered, referring to the grip Mick had around Josef's own fists on his shirt. They weren't really hurting anything, but Josef needed Mick to know exactly who was in charge.

Mick slowly lowered his hands to his sides, letting the palms rest against the wall behind him. Josef let go of some of the power he'd been holding inside for weeks, let some of it leak through his barrier slowly. Not all of it yet, just enough to let Mick know what this was about. What was going to happen.

At the first sense of what Josef was letting through, Mick stiffened and panic filled his eyes. Josef was surprised at the depth of emotion he saw there. Why was Mick so afraid? He had to know Josef wasn't going to really harm him. He'd been through this once before, after all, with Coraline.

"No," Mick gasped. "Not yet."

Ah. So that was it. He just wasn't ready to face the things he'd been trying so hard to deny. Well, Rake had given him some good advice. Far be it from Josef to ignore the experience of an Elder.

"Say it, Mick. You know what I want. I just want the word. All you have to do is say the word."

Josef met Mick's eyes, but Mick was unable to hold the stare, the fledgling inside already unable to challenge the small bit of dominance Josef was letting through. Mick's eyes shut tightly and he turned his head away and down, so that the left side of his face was against the wall and his chin was tucked into his own shoulder.

Oh, no, you don't, Josef thought. You're not getting out of this that easy.

Josef released one of his clenched fists from Mick's shirt and used that hand to grip the other vampire's chin instead. He forcefully pulled Mick's head around to face forward and adjusted his grip so his fingers were holding tight to Mick's jaw from underneath.

"Open your eyes, Mick. Do it!"

Mick opened his eyes at the command but was unable to meet Josef's own eyes.

"Good boy," Josef praised. "Now say it. Just the one word, Mick. I have to know you acknowledge it. That you know you belong to me."

"Please, Josef," Mick begged in a hoarse voice. "Not yet. Please. Not yet."

Josef almost, almost gave in to Mick's pleadings. He hated the desperate sound of Mick's voice. He thought maybe he was rushing things....

"Later, okay? Please, Josef. I just need time....please...."

....but then he thought of the rest of Rake's advice.

"Time's up, Mick."

He let loose about half of the concealed power, holding the other half back, but Mick responded anyway, flinching back as much as Josef's grip and the wall behind would allow. Josef readjusted his hold on Mick's jaw.

"Say it," Josef growled softly.

Mick gave a small sob, tearing Josef's heart, but then he gave in to his instinct and the dominance flowing from Josef.

"Sire," he said in another sob, voicing the word Josef had demanded.

"Good," Josef said softly, letting go of Mick's jaw and patting the side of his face gently. "Submit." Just as softly.

But Mick needed no more prompting. He let the back of his head fall to rest against the wall behind him and he tilted his head back to present his throat, much as he had when he'd first asked Josef to turn him back.

Josef let loose the rest of what he'd been holding back, feeling it flow from him, and he leaned forward and sank his fangs into Mick's neck.

----------------------------------------------------------------
They felt as if they were inside each other, Mick seeing himself with Josef's eyes, and Josef seeing himself with Mick's eyes. Their thoughts, their minds, their hearts wrapped around each other and they became one for that moment in time. Josef felt Mick's fears, needs, and desires, just as Mick felt Josef's. They experienced each other's loves and sorrows. Josef saw how deep Mick's feelings for Beth really ran and his heart quailed at Mick's fear of losing her, and Mick felt the depth of Josef's love for Sarah and he shed tears in Josef's sorrow over what had happened to her and the fear that she would remain that way forever. For that one moment that would soon fade and be forgotten, they relived each other's pasts, Josef's infinitely longer than Mick's, but both almost instantaneously. Josef was Mick, feeling the warmth of his family as a child and his later betrayal at what Coraline had done to him, and everything in between. Mick was Josef, knowing how four centuries could bring such loneliness, and how Mick himself had alleviated much of that with his friendship over the last half century. All this transpired in a matter of seconds, barely half a minute, and yet an eternity. For those seconds, they had no secrets. For that one quick moment, they were each other.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Mick


That was it. That was what they'd been waiting for, that underlying tension that had been lying in wait. The sense of relief was insurmountable. He'd been fighting it, true, but now that it was done he felt.... complete.

There was a new feeling in him now, one he'd have to examine later to be able to explain it, even to himself, and his sense of Josef was different now, too. Josef seemed more confident, more commanding. Josef had never had a problem portraying that image to everyone around him, but this aura was a new one to Mick's eyes, and Mick had a feeling that it was just for him, that no one else would see the slight difference.

But he was exhausted. The emotional stress added to the depletion of blood was doing him in. As Josef pulled away and released him, Mick felt his knees buckle. Josef caught him before he ended up in an undignified heap on the floor, and leaned him against the wall, helping Mick brace himself with a steadying hand against his chest.

"You okay?" Josef asked softly. He'd changed back to his human face.
Mick nodded, then said, "Weak."

Josef placed his hand against the back of Mick's head and brought Mick forward and down to his own neck. "Drink," he said, still cradling the back of Mick's head with his palm.

Mick let his fangs drop and slid them into Josef's throat, savoring the unique flavor. He brought his hands up and gripped the fabric of Josef's suit jacket on each side of the waist in two tight fists in his intensity. He knew he'd been granted a special privilege.

In most Sire/fledgling relationships, it was customary for the Sire to drink from the fledgling's jugular, but the fledgling was usually relegated to partaking from his maker's wrist, just as when the fledgling was first turned. Allowing anyone to drink from his own throat was usually too submissive a gesture for a Sire to tolerate. Mick felt honored at the gesture.

The intense awareness of each other they'd shared moments ago faded quickly, the largest parts of it already forgotten by both- it had happened too quickly for either of them to retain much of it. But one thing stayed with Mick. He hadn't realized what he'd done to Josef by asking him to turn him back.

Oh, he knew the long term responsibilities and that Josef was now stuck with him permanently, and all the usual stuff that came with being a Sire. Josef himself had explained some of that to him during one of their discussions. But until he'd seen it in Josef, Mick hadn't realized that Josef had been terrified the whole time that Mick would suffer some sort of bad effects as Sarah had, or maybe in some other form. Josef had wondered if maybe it was in him, that maybe he couldn't sire normally.

And then there was the resentment. And the guilt for that resentment. It wasn't overwhelmingly strong, but it was there, buried so deep Mick doubted that Josef himself even realized it was there. It wasn't resentment against Mick himself- after being a part of Josef, Mick could never again doubt how much his friend- now Sire- cared for him. No, the resentment was against the circumstances. Why couldn't it have worked with Sarah? If Mick was okay, then what did he do wrong with her?

And even deeper down Mick found that even as Josef had agreed to turn Mick, he'd done it with the inner certainty that Mick wouldn't wake up. And he'd hated himself, and Mick for asking, until the very moment Mick had opened his eyes. Then continued hating himself for taking the chance.

As Mick replenished himself with Josef's blood, he felt a deep need to make it up to Josef for having put him through all that. He wasn't sure at first how he could. He really had nothing with which to offer the other man. What could Mick possibly give the one person he knew that needed nothing?

As Mick was pulled gently from Josef's neck, it suddenly came to him. There was only one way he could think of to repay Josef for having asked him to turn him back, for the emotional upheaval Josef had endured- was still enduring- because of it. He could become the perfect childe. Well, maybe 'perfect' was pushing it a bit. But he could do his best to change. At least a little. To show his gratitude and remorse at the same time. He could become what Josef would want in a childe, what he deserved.

Mick would be loyal. That one would be easy. Mick had always been loyal to his friend. But he could try harder at the aspects that wouldn't be so easy. He could be more obedient and respectful. Those would be harder, Mick had to admit to himself. It's not that he'd ever been disobedient or disrespectful toward Josef, but their interaction had always been more friendship than anything else. Only occasionally had the fact that Josef was Mick's elder and Community Leader intervened. And he could try to be more....submissive....when the situation called for it. That would be the hardest, he figured.

And of course, he had no idea how Josef was going to decide to handle it all himself. Would he automatically begin acting differently, treating Mick differently now? Would he suddenly expect different behaviors from Mick? Mick had no way of knowing yet, but he hoped that if that was the case, Josef would give him time to acclimate. And that the change wouldn't be too drastic- at least not any more drastic than the changes Mick was going to try to make in himself.

"Better?" Josef asked as Mick straightened up and uncurled his fingers from their tight grip on Josef's clothing. Josef held Mick steady by the shoulders, one hand on each.

"Yes," Mick answered. "Thank you."

"Good." Josef smiled. "That was just to alleviate most of the weakness. You'll have to feed. I'll have a freshie come up. No arguments. You'll feel better after."

Mick opened his mouth to voice his usual protest, but remembered his new vow just in time. "Okay, Josef," he said in resignation.

He decided, as much as he didn't want to, that that would have to be one of his first changes. Josef had been harping on him for the longest time about Mick's moral avoidance of feeding on humans, willing or not. Nothing would force Mick to feed from an unwilling donor, but he figured he'd have to begin drinking from freshies now on a regular basis. Well, more regular than the 'twice a week' Josef had mandated over the past few weeks.

Mick had fostered a sneaking suspicion, anyway, that Josef had planned on upping the ante over time until he had Mick feasting fresh regularly. He would just beat him to the punch and do it on his own as part of his recompense. He didn't really like it, but Mick knew that when Josef made his mind up about something, nothing Mick could say or do would change it.

Especially now and especially concerning Mick, now that Josef has a vested interest in Mick's well-being. At least this way, they could avoid that future battle over the issue in which Mick knew he would protest and fight it, but still lose to Josef's wishes. At least this way it would look like his own decision.

"Good," Josef said again, nodding in approval at Mick's resigned agreement. He walked over to the intercom and asked one of his staff to send up two girls.

"Candy's for you, Mick. You seemed to like her last time."

"Thank you," Mick said sincerely. He was surprised- and yet not- that Josef had noticed.

"So tell me, Mick," Josef asked with some of his previous anger returning as he leaned backward against his desk to wait for their dinner to arrive. He crossed his arms over his chest. "What could have possibly motivated you to come here tonight and do something so stupid as that little game you played?"

Mick shrugged sheepishly. "It seemed like a good idea at the time," he answered.

Josef did not look amused. "I hope you've redefined your definition of 'a good idea'."

Mick uncomfortably remembered Josef's anger as he'd painfully gripped the scruff of his neck. "Definitely," Mick said with feeling. "I'm sorry, Josef."

"Do you realize you could have caused irreparable damage out there?"

"I'm sorry." Mick felt the apology was inadequate, but he didn't know what else he could say. "Nothing like that will ever happen again."

"It damn well better not."

Mick swallowed nervously at the hard words. He had no doubt Josef meant what he said.

"And," Josef continued in a sterner voice than Mick had ever before heard from his friend's mouth- Mick actually had to resist the urge to cower a little in response, "I don't know what you said or did to offend the Elder's, but that's a dangerous game, my friend, and one you should have known better than to play."

Mick felt like nothing more than a teenager being scolded. It made it so much worse knowing that the older vampire was right. Any other time, he'd have had enough sense to know better. What he'd done- especially regarding the Elders- was unacceptable and inexcusable, for several reasons. But it had also been dangerous.

There was a light tap at the door. Dinner had arrived. Mick glanced at the closed door in relief at the distraction, then back at Josef, wondering if the old man would take pity on him and belay the rest of the dressing down he seemed so intent on thoroughly delivering. Josef stared at him for a moment silently, stonily, making Mick squirm under the hard look on the deceptively youthful, usually amused face of his friend and Sire.

"We're not finished here," Josef warned. Mick nodded hastily, just glad for the reprieve. "Enter," Josef called out to the girls waiting on the other side of the door.

Mick made sure to feed with gusto, both to honor his new vow and to try to appease Josef. He mused that if it didn't work with Josef, then maybe it would work with some vampire guardian angel that might be hanging around. Maybe if he showed enough effort, the higher powers would have mercy and strike him dead before Josef decided Mick needed further instruction.

When the deed was done and the girls had departed- a little weaker, but happy- Josef gave Mick an appraising look, then nodded in approval. "You look better."

"I feel better," Mick responded truthfully.

"Except for that awful costume," Josef wrinkled his nose in distaste. "And how, exactly, did you even manage a wardrobe change?"

"I brought the clothes in a duffel bag and hid it in the foyer downstairs," Mick admitted shamefacedly. He was hit with a rush of shame and humiliation at his juvenile behavior. He was a grown man, for God's sake! Well...vampire.

"It was ingenious, I have to admit," Josef said with humorous shake of his head and his trademark smirk. But then he seemed to catch himself. "But that doesn't make it okay," he hastily and sternly added.

"No, of course not, Josef," Mick was quick to assure him, quietly glad that Josef's previous anger seemed to be dimming some. Mick thanked those higher powers.

Josef leaned back in the seat he'd taken when he'd fed, and he crossed one ankle over the opposite knees. "You know me well, Mick. You know this isn't the kind of thing I'd normally let go, even for you....."

Well. So much for help from the higher powers. Looked like he was on his own.

A knot of dread formed in the pit of Mick's stomach. He'd conveniently kept himself from thinking of this inevitable outcome. He'd known he'd have to face some kind of consequences. Mick knew that whatever Josef decided, it was no more than he had earned and deserved, but he also knew that Josef had a tendency toward harshness and he couldn't help but wonder what his punishment would be.

Well, whatever it is, Mick decided, I deserve it and I'll take it like a man.

In his seat across from Josef, Mick sat up straight and squared his shoulders, but he kept his head slightly lowered and his eyes directed to the floor so Josef would understand that Mick was submitting rather than challenging. He waited for Josef's judgment.

".....but under the circumstances, after you've made some much needed apologies to my guests, maybe we can just forget all about that part of it. I know you weren't quite yourself, and that's my fault more than anyone else's."

Mick's head flew up, his eyes scanning Josef's face. Apologies? That was it? And Mick couldn't help feeling guilty that Josef was taking responsibility for Mick's own actions.

"Not that I'm complaining, Josef, but how could any of that be your fault? It was me; I did it, not you." Then a terrible thought occurred to him. "Josef, the Elder's aren't going to hold you responsible for my actions toward them, are they?"

"They don't seem to have that inclination, Mick. At least this not this time. But that's a whole separate matter from the little game you played with my other guests. And when I said it was more my fault than yours, don't think that means you're off the hook. You were fully aware of what you were doing. I just didn't take initiative early enough to prevent such problems, and that's my fault. And I see that little game as a revenge tactic of one friend against another during a time of anger. I'm not happy about it, but as long as you know it's not going to happen again-and set things right- it's water under the bridge. But that dangerous little stunt with the Elders- I can't just let that go, Mick."

"Not that I'm trying to get out of taking responsibility, Josef, but.... I'm not sure I see the difference. I was in the same frame of mind all night. How can you forget one offense but still be angry about another when I committed them simultaneously? One was just an extension of the other."

"Maybe you had the same aim all night, Mick, but the difference I see is that while most of the things you ran around all night doing were mostly harmless to you-" Mick silently disagreed, again thinking of Josef's original displeasure- " but then you upped the ante. And I think that's when you let yourself drift over the line from an angry friend to rebellious fledgling But my biggest concern is that you didn't care about the danger.

Mick, an elder has every right to put a younger in his place for disregarding status with disrespect. Sometimes that could mean death, if the offense is enough, but at the very least you could have been humiliated or beaten. And I would have been expected to allow it. You know all this, Mick. I know Coraline taught you almost nothing that a Sire is responsible for teaching, but you've lived long enough to pick up a lot of these things on your own, especially with me giving you pointers through the years."

Mick just stared at the floor, accepting the chastisement as his due. He knew Josef was right. There was a correct protocol for dealing with Elders, a formal respect that was expected. And the younger the vampire, the more it was expected, which was ironic, seeing as many of the newest turns were not taught the correct rituals. Especially if their makers were young ones themselves. It was actually becoming expected that only those from the oldest or finest bloodlines adhered to the few customs of their society.

"I'll apologize to them," Mick offered.

"Yes, you will. And then we'll have a few lessons on the correct behavior. I know you know this stuff, but I don't want to come to your penthouse some day and find that you've been beheaded because you've offended an Elder," Josef remarked, the last sentence only partly a joke.

"It's time for me to step up, Mick," Josef caught Mick's eyes and held the gaze.

When he was sure he had Mick's full attention, he continued solemnly and sincerely. " And I owe you an apology for not doing it before now. I know I've failed you up to now, and I take full responsibility for it. I've done more things wrong than I have right, and I'm sorry for that. I know it's affected you more than I knew. Hell, more than you know. But I promise you that from this point forward, things will be different. I'll teach you the things you need to know, and I'll guide you and protect you the way a Sire is supposed to. This relationship can only make our friendship stronger, Mick, but like I said once before... we won't always agree. All I can do is promise you that I'll never deliberately steer you wrong and I'll always, always, try to do what's the very best for you. It's going to take a lot of trust on your part, and I can only hope my mistakes haven't ruined that."

"I've always trusted you, Josef, more than anyone in my life," Mick said softly. There was a lump of emotion in his throat at Josef's heartfelt words and solemn promise. Don't cry, don't cry, he begged himself. He'd never live it down if Josef saw even one tear. And Mick decided he'd graciously ignore what looked suspiciously like moisture in Josef's eyes.

"Good," Josef nodded and stood up, holding out his hand for Mick to take. Mick, standing as well and expecting a hand shake, was a little startled when Josef closed his hand around Mick's and used it to pull him forward into a tight hug.

Mick squeezed back, but grasped the opportunity as a chance to use his free hand behind Josef's back to reach up and give a quick swipe across his eyes. His mostly dry eyes. Just in case.

They held the position for a few seconds, then both quickly let go and stepped back, both just a little embarrassed at the unmanly moment between them. But both secretly satisfied about it.

Mick cleared his throat a little self-consciously. "Sooo...what now?"

"Now," Josef declared confidently, recovering his decorum much more quickly than his younger friend, " you are going to change back into some decent clothes. Then we're going back downstairs and you're going to set things right with my guests and you're going to set things right with the Elders. But before you do that, I'm going to give you your first lesson- a crash course in the correct formality to apologies to them. I don't want them to decide you still need a lesson in manners. If they know it's being taken care of- and they feel you're properly remorseful- they might just decide not to rip you in half."

"I really am sorry about that."

"Good. But now they need to know it. Now remember, you're apologetic and respectful and do not get defensive if one of them antagonizes you. Remember, you did this to yourself. At least one of them is likely going to try to test you....."

Mick listened raptly to Josef's lesson, determined to do him proud and pull himself out of the hole he'd dug himself into.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The three Elders stood together as Josef and Mick re-entered the room. They could see the
difference immediately, just by the body language and chemistry between the two, but they observed them anyway as the two younger vampires made a circuit of the room, stopping to speak with individuals and groups as they traveled. They wanted to see how they were actually interacting with each other.

"It looks promising," Rake commented at one point. The other two stayed silent.

Eventually, Josef and Mick approached the observing trio and, under Josef's supervision, Mick extended a greeting and a sincere, respect-filled apology to the three Elders he'd offended. When the apology was accepted and the two younger vampires had excused themselves, Malcolm looked at the other two.

"Satisfactory," he said simply.

Rake smiled and gave a little nod. That was high praise from Malcolm.

"Of course," Nigel added. "I knew Josef could do it. I always knew he had it in him. Didn't I tell you?"

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"Now that wasn't all so bad, was it?" Josef asked as he took a sip of his drink.

The gathering had come to an end- finally, Mick thought- and he and Josef were relaxing in Josef's parlor with drinks in hand, winding down from the emotionally turbulent evening.

"I guess not," Mick answered dubiously.

Josef smiled and just shook his head. He was well aware that Mick didn't care much for the formal or black tie type affairs. He still wasn't happy with the way Mick had passed his time during the gathering, but that was taken care of and over with. He decided that the evening had ended quite satisfactory, and if this newfound peace between he and Mick was the result of their earlier turbulence with each other, then he felt it was fully worth it. There was one thing he was still curious about, though....

"Mick....you never did tell me what you actually said or did to those three that had them so uptight."

"Uh, I...uh" Mick stuttered uncomfortably, not really wanting to open a whole new can of worms.

Josef took pity on him. "Never mind," he waved a hand dismissively. "On second thought, I don't think I really want to know."

Mick nodded in relief. "What did that one guy- uh, Malcolm?- what do you think he meant when he said he'd be seeing us soon? That guy's kinda, I don't know.... scary.... definitely not the one person I plan on hunting up for a visit any time soon."

Josef frowned in thought at Mick's question. He'd wondered that himself, to tell the truth. It had been a rather mysterious thing to hear from someone he'd only seen three or four times in a little over four hundred years.

"I don't know, Mick," he answered truthfully. But he had the unwelcome feeling that maybe they hadn't quite seen the last of those three yet. And he didn't like what that might mean.

"Josef?"

Josef looked up at Mick at hearing the uncertainty in the younger's voice. "Yeah? What's up, Mick?"

There was a hesitation in Mick's body language.

"About my case...." Mick started, then trailed off.

"Yeah?" Josef prompted curiously. "What about it?"

"Well... I still have to go out of town. If.... I mean, if it's okay?"

"Of course it's okay. We talked about this, remember? I just wanted you to be here for tonight's gathering."

Mick was asking his permission? Why? Even when Mick had come to him the night before about leaving town on a case, it had been to inform Josef that he was leaving not to ask him, even knowing Josef wouldn't like it. Of course, it hadn't worked, but Mick had probably expected that deep down before he'd even attempted it. He got an A for effort.

"Okay," Mick said, relaxing. "You're sure?"

"Of course, Mick. Do what you need to do. Just be careful, okay? I'm sure I don't have to remind you what happens when you stay away too long. Try not to stay gone more than two or three days. The minute you start feeling edgy or nervous, you get back here pronto. Capice?"

"I will," Mick promised. "Thanks."

"Sure," Josef replied, a little perplexed at Mick's strange behavior, but he was too tired to pursue it at the moment. "Now I don't know about you, but it's been a long night. I'm ready for some freezer time. It's almost dawn. You're welcome to stay the day if you want. You know I had that extra freezer fitted in one of the bedrooms for you, down the hall from me."

Mick declined the offer, wanting to get home so he could call Beth and hopefully reach her before she went off to work, but he remembered how honored he'd felt when Josef had told him last week about the new freezer.

He knew Josef had other working freezers on the immense property for visiting vamps- Mick had used them on occasion himself- but Josef had divulged the week before that he'd had a freezer for Mick put into one of the nicer guest bedrooms. Josef had made sure Mick understood that the room was meant only for Mick now, it was no longer a guest room but his room, whenever he needed it or wanted it. It had meant a lot to Mick, also, that the privacy- loving older vampire had chosen one of the rooms so close to his own, just on the other side of the same hallway and down a few rooms.

Josef watched as his friend left and wondered if he should worry about this sudden change in his behavior. It wasn't worrying behavior in itself, not irritable, violent or volatile or anything of a similar nature. Rather passive, actually. What was worrying is the fact that it just wasn't Mick.

Maybe it was just a passing phase. Maybe in reaction to Josef's earlier dominance of him.

Anyway, Josef decided, whatever it is, I won't be solving it today. I'm almost too tired to think, and if it is a real problem, it'll still be there later. Time to hit the ice.