Different - a Mick VO - PG13

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Lilly
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Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by Lilly »

This short piece is written as a Mick voice over as it might have been delivered sometime shortly after “Fated To Pretend.”

Disclaimer: I do not own Moonlight or any of its characters. Occasionally one of them speaks to me and I take dictation. No disrespect or copyright infringement is ever intended -- just entertainment and mild diversion.

Rating: PG13.



Different


I tried to eat a doughnut the other day. You may not think that sounds strange, but it is - now that I’m a vampire again. Food isn’t supposed to appeal to me anymore. But there it was. I was cleaning out the kitchen, throwing out remnants of what I accumulated during my detour through mortality. I was about to toss the box, but there was one doughnut left and, for reasons I can’t explain, it still looked good to me. I knew I wouldn’t be able to taste it, but I wanted to feel the texture in my mouth, to actually chew on something again. Just one more time.

It’s hard to explain, but I feel different. I don’t just mean different from being human. And I’m not talking about my body being all screwed up - not knowing night from day, blood from doughnuts. It’s something else and I can’t put my finger on it.

Maybe it has something to do with the cure – some residual effect, like a humanity hangover. Maybe it’s because I’ve been through this before. I don’t know. Josef says it’s because I finally admitted I’m in love. That - alive or undead – I’ve acknowledged my reason for existing. That’s part of it, but there’s something else.

You know, I once told Josef I was his only friend who didn’t like him just for his money. It was verbal payback, but since then I’ve wondered. Over the course of fifty years, when did he go from being a pain in my ass to someone I trusted with my life? Or - to take my life?

Why are we friends anyway? It’s not like we’re usually on the same moral page. Hell, we don’t even have the same playbook. And why doesn’t that bother me? Why do I accept things in him that I can’t accept in myself? I’ve always seen myself as a monster and him simply as who he is. Maybe it has something to do with how comfortable he is in his own skin.

I’m not sure I was that at ease with myself when I was human. The first time, I mean. I had plenty of regrets by the time I met Coraline. When she turned me, she managed take my flaws and fears and twist them into something eternal. Throw in an insatiable thirst for human blood and that was her damned “gift.” Some days I think it’s not so much what she took from me but what she left me with.

And that doughnut? I had to spit it out. It’s not the only thing lately I’ve had a hard time swallowing. My body may be sending me mixed signals, but in some ways my head is clearer than it’s been in years. Maybe I do know why.

Josef gave me something – more than I asked for. I expected him to turn me back – no questions asked. It never occurred to me that he would hesitate. He’s been a friend, mentor, brother – and now sire. Yeah, I know he denies it. He has to. But it’s there, anyway.

I feel different this time. Stronger – and more at peace with myself. I guess making the choice, taking your fate into your own hands, is empowering. When you have no one to blame, you lose your crutch. You have to stand on your own feet. The bottom line is – I’m a vampire right now because I chose to be. I may mourn my loss but I’ll never regret my decision. Still, the way I feel - I have to wonder if somehow it’s in the blood.

I’ve been turned twice. The difference is – Coraline poisoned me and Josef gave me an antidote.


--------
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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by wpgrace »

I love this one Lilly... so Mick. He has such a gentle, humourous way with his V/O's and this really does sound like him... and his musings on Josef are lovely to see.
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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by allegrita »

Lilly, you've really captured Mick's voice, his wistfulness, his humor, and... well, his soul, I guess... in this story. I love the donut, I love his thoughts about accepting things in Josef that he can't in himself, I love his comparison of his two turnings.

My favorite line is hard to choose, but this is certainly one of them:
Some days I think it’s not so much what she took from me but what she left me with.
Everything by you that I've read has impressed me, and this story is no exception.
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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by lunalux »

allegrita wrote:Lilly, you've really captured Mick's voice, his wistfulness, his humor, and... well, his soul, I guess... in this story. I love the donut, I love his thoughts about accepting things in Josef that he can't in himself, I love his comparison of his two turnings.

My favorite line is hard to choose, but this is certainly one of them:
Some days I think it’s not so much what she took from me but what she left me with.
Everything by you that I've read has impressed me, and this story is no exception.
ITA with my friend Alle, I love that line too....it says it all...this was perfect. thanks!
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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by Lilly »

grace, allegrita and luna -- Thank you all for commenting here!

I love Mick's voice overs -- aside from hearing those velvet tones, we're allowed much deeper into his soul and we get to see his sense of irony more than at any other time. I'm so glad this rang true for you all. ((hugs))
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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

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Lilly wrote:grace, allegrita and luna -- Thank you all for commenting here!

I love Mick's voice overs -- aside from hearing those velvet tones, we're allowed much deeper into his soul and we get to see his sense of irony more than at any other time. I'm so glad this rang true for you all. ((hugs))

I agree with you... I really think the use of those voice overs was a big part of what made the show work... Mick was such a closed-off guy, but he let fly in the v/o's... and we discovered he had a much cuter personality than his public behaviors might have otherwise led an observer to believe.

And given Alex's actual voice, well that was a slam dunk decision...

But I think it does make it hard for fanfic writers, since there is a very high mark to have to measure up to... tho what do I know? But I would think that it would be hard to write in "his" voice...

I gotta tell ya, all 3 of y'all-- Lilly, Alle, and Luna--you are all masters at it. That is a big part of my enjoyment of your fics... you get Mick so very right.

I hope you'll all keep doing it...
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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by Trixie »

Lilly wrote:...I love Mick's voice overs -- aside from hearing those velvet tones, we're allowed much deeper into his soul and we get to see his sense of irony more than at any other time. I'm so glad this rang true for you all...
Lilly, you truly have a gift!

It doesn't matter what the subject is that you take on, it always rings true.

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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by ari »

This is such an amazing piece. I really believe you got it right. The fact he chose to be turned has made him more comfortable with being a vampire
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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by Fleur de Lisa »

Damn, you are good.
a humanity hangover.
Loved the cleverness of that simple statement, and it rings true.

Introspective Mick is always enjoyable, but you added a few more layers to him that were just phenomenal here.
Coraline poisoned me and Josef gave me an antidote.
Awesome line, just awesome.
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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by PNWgal »

I don't think I ever commented on this when I read it elsewhere...but I really enjoyed this.

Mick struggles so much with what was done to him, but...I truly believe he struggled even before he met Coraline.
I’ve always seen myself as a monster and him simply as who he is. Maybe it has something to do with how comfortable he is in his own skin.
I've always found this so interesting. He's so willing to give Josef a pass for being a vampire, yet won't cut himself the same slack. Usually it's the opposite - people will quickly forgive themselves before they forgive others for the same sins.
I guess making the choice, taking your fate into your own hands, is empowering.
And that's the bottom line, isn't it? The difference between making your own choice and having the choice made for you - the peace of mind.

Wonderful, Lilly. :hug:
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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by mitzie »

Wonderfully Mick! That last line was pure genius and so true!! Loved this story!!!! :clapping: :clapping: :clapping: :clapping: :clapping: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :notworthy: :worship: :rose:

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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by Lilly »

ari, Lisa, PNW, and mitzie -- Thank you all so much for your wonderful comments. I can't really explain it -- some days, Mick just speaks to me. He's been awfully quite lately, though -- I'm starting to miss him. :sigh:
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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by jen »

Lilly

Love this.

I can so hear Alex O'Laughlin saying these words.

Lovely!

Thank you!

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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by MickLifeCrisis »

I had never read this before, Lilly, so I'm glad it popped to the top. This was wonderful! Mick finally accepting who and what he is. Not only was it his choice this time, but he did it for love. Makes a world of difference. Or should I say, an eternity of difference.

A great read!
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Re: Different - a Mick VO - PG13

Post by Lilly »

Thank you, jen and MLC! :rose: It's hard to believe that it's been almost 2 years since I wrote this. It remains one of my personal favorites and I'm really pleased to see that new eyes are still finding it. Thank you both so much for your kind words.
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