Remembrances; chapter 1
- crazy fluffy
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Remembrances; chapter 1
I've noticed that some of you would like to read my new story, but have some problems with understanding german , so francis suggested I should also post it in English.
Apparently I'm not very good in writing in English (there are so many past and future tenses, it's really confusing for someone who has only one past tense in the spoken language (I speak swissgerman). ), so thanks to francis for taking time and translating the chapter.
The story takes place around two years after the last episode of Moonlight, but without the events of the list and the Legion.
Los Angeles, 2009:
Mick St. John could clearly hear the four loud reports of the bullets when they left the barrel of the gun. He heard the faint hiss as the projectiles whizzed through the air in short order to drill into a human body without difficulty. And he heard how Beth's body fell down onto the hard concrete floor shortly afterwards.
He screamed.
"Beth. Nooooo. Don’t... "
He looked at the man who still aimed his weapon on Beth, the one who still wore a greasy grin on his face as his head was already no longer connected with the rest of his body and fell to the ground.
Mick was at Beth’s side within a few seconds, as she lay only a few feet away from him and uttered a soft groan. He gently knelt down beside her. There was blood everywhere, the bullets had hit her in the abdomen and upper chest, from whose wounds she was bleeding heavily. She had almost lost consciousness, even though she tried with all her strength to fight against it. Mick was desperately trying to stop the bleeding, but it was an almost hopeless task.
"Mick, i-I love you, please forgive me ..." Beth said with a weak voice. She tried hard to open her eyes, but her eyelids only fluttered slightly to finally stay closed. Mick stroked gently with his palm against the cheeks to bring her back to consciousness.
"No Beth, you stay with me. Look at me: you will get through this, okay? Stay with me ... "He was desperate, Beth's wounds did not stop bleeding and she had already suffered a huge loss of blood.
Once again, Beth woke up briefly to consciousness, her eyes sought those of Mick and held them.
"Please Mick, remember what I told you two weeks ago. I have not changed my mind, it is still the same, just as it was two years ago. There is no curse Mick, not for me, please believe me. I-I ... "
"No, Beth, don’t worry, you'll make it, I already called the ambulance, everything will be fine, trust me, just stay with me ...", he tried to calm her as best as possible.
But Mick had already seen enough people die, so he knew that any help would come too late for Beth. As a vampire he had learned to read the heartbeat of humans with his fine ear. He could hear in the heartbeat of people whether they lied to him, or were just sad, or if they were about to die, just as Beth now. The heartbeat of Beth was only very weak, it did not leave them much time. He knew exactly what Beth wanted, what she begged him to do, but he simply couldn’t ...
"Mick, you promised ... we ... there are so many things I still want to do with you ... please Mick, if nothing else works, then do it."
She wanted to say something more, but once again the veil of unconsciousness was put over her eyes and she faded. She still felt that Mick continued to bend down to her and whisper something softly in her ear: "Beth, please forgive me ..."
TBC
Please remember: comments are love and feeding my muse.
Apparently I'm not very good in writing in English (there are so many past and future tenses, it's really confusing for someone who has only one past tense in the spoken language (I speak swissgerman). ), so thanks to francis for taking time and translating the chapter.
The story takes place around two years after the last episode of Moonlight, but without the events of the list and the Legion.
Los Angeles, 2009:
Mick St. John could clearly hear the four loud reports of the bullets when they left the barrel of the gun. He heard the faint hiss as the projectiles whizzed through the air in short order to drill into a human body without difficulty. And he heard how Beth's body fell down onto the hard concrete floor shortly afterwards.
He screamed.
"Beth. Nooooo. Don’t... "
He looked at the man who still aimed his weapon on Beth, the one who still wore a greasy grin on his face as his head was already no longer connected with the rest of his body and fell to the ground.
Mick was at Beth’s side within a few seconds, as she lay only a few feet away from him and uttered a soft groan. He gently knelt down beside her. There was blood everywhere, the bullets had hit her in the abdomen and upper chest, from whose wounds she was bleeding heavily. She had almost lost consciousness, even though she tried with all her strength to fight against it. Mick was desperately trying to stop the bleeding, but it was an almost hopeless task.
"Mick, i-I love you, please forgive me ..." Beth said with a weak voice. She tried hard to open her eyes, but her eyelids only fluttered slightly to finally stay closed. Mick stroked gently with his palm against the cheeks to bring her back to consciousness.
"No Beth, you stay with me. Look at me: you will get through this, okay? Stay with me ... "He was desperate, Beth's wounds did not stop bleeding and she had already suffered a huge loss of blood.
Once again, Beth woke up briefly to consciousness, her eyes sought those of Mick and held them.
"Please Mick, remember what I told you two weeks ago. I have not changed my mind, it is still the same, just as it was two years ago. There is no curse Mick, not for me, please believe me. I-I ... "
"No, Beth, don’t worry, you'll make it, I already called the ambulance, everything will be fine, trust me, just stay with me ...", he tried to calm her as best as possible.
But Mick had already seen enough people die, so he knew that any help would come too late for Beth. As a vampire he had learned to read the heartbeat of humans with his fine ear. He could hear in the heartbeat of people whether they lied to him, or were just sad, or if they were about to die, just as Beth now. The heartbeat of Beth was only very weak, it did not leave them much time. He knew exactly what Beth wanted, what she begged him to do, but he simply couldn’t ...
"Mick, you promised ... we ... there are so many things I still want to do with you ... please Mick, if nothing else works, then do it."
She wanted to say something more, but once again the veil of unconsciousness was put over her eyes and she faded. She still felt that Mick continued to bend down to her and whisper something softly in her ear: "Beth, please forgive me ..."
TBC
Please remember: comments are love and feeding my muse.
Last edited by crazy fluffy on Sun Mar 28, 2010 9:19 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Sorry for all english errors I write!
- wollstonecraft61
- Rogue vampire
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
OMG, Mick, for Chris's sake, Turn her already!! Great story!!!!!!!
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
Is he asking her forgiveness for turning her or for not? I'll keep reading to find out.
Good start!
Good start!
- AggieVamp
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
Crazy Fluffy -
I love the beginning and really want to read more (please!).
Karen
I love the beginning and really want to read more (please!).
Karen
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- AussieJo
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
Oh thank you C.F! and thank you francis for translating!
It sounds good.
It sounds good.
- lynnrxgal
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
What a teaser! Great start!
- lorig
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
Thank you CrazyFluffy and Francis for translating this!
Oh man..please tell me he is apologizing for turning her. Don't tell me he lets her die.
The title gives me a bad feeling, but I will wait to see!!
Oh man..please tell me he is apologizing for turning her. Don't tell me he lets her die.
The title gives me a bad feeling, but I will wait to see!!
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- crazy fluffy
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
wollstonecraft61, NightAir, AggieVamp, AussieJo, lynnrxgal and lorig : Thank you very much for reading and commenting!
I'm really happy you like the beginning of my story.
I'm really happy you like the beginning of my story.
Sorry for all english errors I write!
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
OK, you've got my attention now. Hope there's more soon.
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
OK .I;m hooked. did he or didn't he. I.ll be watchimg for an update. Good work.
- MickLifeCrisis
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
You've got me on the edge of my seat... Please say that Mick is asking for forgiveness for turning her, not asking to be forgiven for breaking his promise and letting her die. As Lorig said, the title "Remembrances" has me worried.
Great start, and I can't wait for more!
Great start, and I can't wait for more!
MickLifeCrisis
Many thanks to Twilightdew for my banner and avi.
Many thanks to Twilightdew for my banner and avi.
- Albra
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
more more more
Good opening !
Good opening !
- crazy fluffy
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
Thank you; catravers, tucutecats, MickLifeCrisis and Albra. I'm glad you like it and want more to read.
Next chapter should be up next monday, if RL doesn't go in the way.
Next chapter should be up next monday, if RL doesn't go in the way.
Sorry for all english errors I write!
- norsmyth
- Kostan Industries intern
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
Wow, what a beginning! Look forward to seeing the next chapter---will he or won't he??
- helloeeze
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Re: Remembrances; chapter 1
I feel a turning is coming on!