Pensive (PG-13)

[librarian_7]

Oh, gosh, thank you for all the comments. If I ever want to illustrate to anyone why I write fanfic, I could show them this thread, and I think that would make it abundantly clear.

I am always so interested to hear all your views on my stories.

Lucky

[cassysj]

This is just beautiful. When you have immortality human lives are just a blink of an eye. I do love that in the quiet dark moments of the night Josef seeks out Lucky.

[maggatha3]

Oh, Lucky seems to be a very special lady!! And she makes Josef feel and look different too.

Lucky, is there an order in which I should read those stories??

[librarian_7]

Well, there is a list at viewtopic.php?f=152&t=4933 of all the stories in order.

Sorry the links aren't all up to date...I need to work on that. It's gotten to be kind of a long list...

Lucky

[maggatha3]

But chances were he’d never have found women as beautiful, as clever, as loving as the ones he’d fed from and bedded, these four hundred years.

This is sooooo like Josef in my ears, totally the way he feels not only about women, but mostly about vampirism!

[jen]

Lucky,

This is lovely. Those very late hours of the night have a special characteristic, when the pendalum of darkness reaches it apex and the external silence brings out more introspection than is comfortable.

We've all been there, in one way or another.

Love Eris' comment upthread.

While Josef does not do self examination often (or perhaps, he just doesn't admit to it) he is here.

Wonderful story!

Jenna

[Marigold]

Josef poured himself a fresh drink and thought that one of the down sides of being nocturnal, was that there came that hour almost every night, somewhere around four or five a.m., when the whole world seemed to be shut down, when the loneliness set in with dull claws, working on him in a way that was entirely without pity. When business, parties, and books palled and he was left with ghosts and thoughts.

Fortunately, Lucky is there for him whenever he needs her. She is usually able to temporarily banish the ghosts and thoughts, or at least quiet them.

You did a fantastic job of transcribing Josef's pensive thoughts.

Thank you!

[allegrita]

I can't believe I never commented on this! The wee hours, when all the frantic activity stops, but it's not yet time to rest... this is definitely a time when Josef would look back over the years and ponder a bit. And now, with the change in his relationship with Lucky, how could he help but think about the what-ifs and what-whens?

Mortals are brief flames. Beautiful, warm, vital. And, as the officiant said at Josh's funeral, mortality's fragility is what makes it so precious. Josef and Lucky are just as caught in "right here, right now" as Mick and Beth. It's not a state that can be maintained for too long, because it's totally unresolved. But I can absolutely understand both Josef's and Mick's wish to simply exist for a while in that transient place of peace and comfort. Because none of the choices to come will be easy ones, whatever Josef says to himself.

I wanted to also comment on what eris wrote; I think it's a brilliant analysis of how the relationship must change when a beloved human is turned. And add to that the sire/fledgling dynamic... it's a whole new ballgame, for better or worse. I honestly believe that, where Lucky and Josef are concerned, that is not a possibility, even if Sarah weren't a factor. Lucky's not cut out to be a vamp. So what will become of her? Does she have her own set of pensive thoughts in the dark hours before dawn?