A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

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Lilly
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A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by Lilly »

This outrageous bit of silliness was written in late February, 2008, in honor of Dr. Seuss' birthday. (Sorry Ted.)


AB That Way (A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - slightly pared down)


Mick:
That Josef K, that Josef K
I do not like that Josef K

Josef:
Do you like AB that way ?
*points to a raven-haired freshie*

I do not like it, Josef K
I do not like AB that way

Would you like it blond or red?

I would not like it blond or red
I like my bottled stuff instead
I do not like AB that way
I do not like it, Josef K.

Would you like it on the couch?
Come on man - don’t be a grouch.


I do not like it on the couch
I do not - I am not a grouch

I do not like it blond or red
I do not like it in my bed
I do not like AB that way
I do not like it, Josef K

Would you taste it from a wrist?
Now from a neck would be a twist.


Not from a wrist
Not with a twist
Not on a couch
I’m not a grouch
Not blond or red
Not in my bed
I would not try AB that way
I do not like it, Josef K

Would you, could you
take a taste?
Bite them, bite them
Don't let it waste


I would not, could not
take a taste

You may like them
They’re so fresh
You may like them
In the flesh!


I would not, could not in the flesh
I don’t care if they are fresh!
I do not like it from a wrist
Not from a neck, not with a twist
I do not like it on a couch
(Just so you know – I like the pouch)
I do not like them blond or red
I do not like them in my bed
I would not try AB that way
I do not like it, Josef K

You do not like AB that way?

I do not like it, Josef K.

You don’t like freshies – so you say.
Try them, try them and you may.
Try them and you may, I say.


Josef! If you will let me be.
I will try them. You will see.

* Hesitantly samples a wrist *

Say! I do like AB that way!
I do! I like it, Josef K!

I will take it in the flesh
It’s really good when they are fresh!
And I will take it from a wrist
And from a neck with just a twist
And I will try it on a couch
I see the light – forget the pouch
And I will try them blond or red -
I think I like them in my bed.
I will take AB that way
It’s so much better, Josef K

I do so like AB that way!
Thank you!
Thank you, Josef K!


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:roll:
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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by cassysj »

Lilly this is adorable beyond words. It does Dr. Seuss proud.
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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by greenleaf9 »

Lilly I ADORE this! :lol: :lol: :lol:

You got the cadence just right.
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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by Lilly »

Thanks, greenleaf! My poor son wanted to know why Mommy was reading his book so intently at the computer. :roll:
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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by Fleur de Lisa »

Fantastic!! This is incredibly adorable and funny.
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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by Josefismysire »

Brilliant! Charming!! A new classic!! Loved Loved Loved it, Lilly!! :yahoo: :clapping: :hearts:
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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by mitzie »

That was an absolute riot!! I loved it!!!! :coffee: :rofl2: :clapping: :clapping: :clapping: :clapping: :clapping: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :clapping: :clapping: :notworthy:

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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by Lilly »

Thanks so much , Lisa, JIMS and mitzie -- so glad it brought a smile to your faces. :snicker:
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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by jen »

Lilly,

I adore this!!!

You have, indeed, done Dr. Suess proud, but you have done Moonlight proud, too!

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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by darkstarrising »

Lilly,

I'm with jen....this is not only precious, it's very well done....while I'd love to see this acted out, I'm not sure either Jason or Alex could keep a straight face.....
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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by mitzie »

I just finished a re-read of this! I love it even more the second time!!!! :biggrin: It's priceless!!!! :hyper2: :hyper2: :hyper2: :hyper2: :rolling: :teeth: :eat: :devil: :jester: :evillaugh: :coffee: :eek2: :dracula: :heart: :yahoo: :yahoo: :clapping: :clapping: :clapping: :clapping: :thud: :thud: :thud: :thud: :notworthy: :twothumbs: :flowers:


mitzie :mooncat:
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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by jen »

Just reread it and it is just adorable! So very right-on-the-Moonlight!

Thank you!!!

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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by darkstarrising »

This is just so perfect!! :hearts: The cadence is true to the good doctor, while the word play is true to the personalities of Mick and Josef.
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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by jmc »

Thanks for bringing this back up to the top, jen. I just love this, Lilly. So Seuss and yet so Moonlight, something Morticia might have read to her little nippers? :giggle:
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Re: A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - PG

Post by wpgrace »

:giggle: Have not read this in forever... Lilly, you're amazing. The most versatile writer we got. Parody, comedy, drama, dark, heart-warming... you've written it all. :happysigh: :happysigh: :happysigh:
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