AB That Way (A Vampire Ode to Green Eggs and Ham - slightly pared down)
Mick:
That Josef K, that Josef K
I do not like that Josef K
Josef:
Do you like AB that way ? *points to a raven-haired freshie*
I do not like it, Josef K
I do not like AB that way
Would you like it blond or red?
I would not like it blond or red
I like my bottled stuff instead
I do not like AB that way
I do not like it, Josef K.
Would you like it on the couch?
Come on man - don’t be a grouch.
I do not like it on the couch
I do not - I am not a grouch
I do not like it blond or red
I do not like it in my bed
I do not like AB that way
I do not like it, Josef K
Would you taste it from a wrist?
Now from a neck would be a twist.
Not from a wrist
Not with a twist
Not on a couch
I’m not a grouch
Not blond or red
Not in my bed
I would not try AB that way
I do not like it, Josef K
Would you, could you
take a taste?
Bite them, bite them
Don't let it waste
I would not, could not
take a taste
You may like them
They’re so fresh
You may like them
In the flesh!
I would not, could not in the flesh
I don’t care if they are fresh!
I do not like it from a wrist
Not from a neck, not with a twist
I do not like it on a couch
(Just so you know – I like the pouch)
I do not like them blond or red
I do not like them in my bed
I would not try AB that way
I do not like it, Josef K
You do not like AB that way?
I do not like it, Josef K.
You don’t like freshies – so you say.
Try them, try them and you may.
Try them and you may, I say.
Josef! If you will let me be.
I will try them. You will see.
* Hesitantly samples a wrist *
Say! I do like AB that way!
I do! I like it, Josef K!
I will take it in the flesh
It’s really good when they are fresh!
And I will take it from a wrist
And from a neck with just a twist
And I will try it on a couch
I see the light – forget the pouch
And I will try them blond or red -
I think I like them in my bed.
I will take AB that way
It’s so much better, Josef K
I do so like AB that way!
Thank you!
Thank you, Josef K!
It's priceless!!!! 
