100% Freshie, Chapter 20 --PG-13

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librarian_7
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100% Freshie, Chapter 20 --PG-13

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Disclaimer: The characters from Moonlight are copyrighted by CBS, and no infringement is intended.

Special note: This work takes place in the world of Moonlight, but your favorite vamps are not the main focus. Sorry about that; try to enjoy the story anyway. You might be surprised.


100% Freshie

Chapter 20

“No.”

Will sat back in his chair, composed his body and features into a still quietness he hoped would disguise his inward agitation. He waited, sure that there would be a torrent of words to follow from her, and not sure what his own voice would betray if he spoke. He tried to force his mind away from his emotions, especially since he was having a hard time deciding exactly what those emotions even were. Anger, maybe, disappointment, regret. Curiosity. As he calmed himself through the silence, it occurred to him that had this issue ever arisen before, he would most likely have either taken his anger and vanished into the night, or not cared enough to wait for an explanation. Vanished into the night. Yeah, that was his specialty.

Ever since Firefly—he stopped. He had to get off that train of thought before it left the depot. There had been profound differences there. Firefly had been his lover, not his freshie. Freshies were food. That’s all. Freshies were food. After all, it wasn’t as thought he’d made love to them. Held them, petted them…He told himself again, freshies were food. Damn good food, but food. From what he remembered of human tastes, the difference between the blood of an unwilling victim in pain, and that of a willing freshie in sexual climax from the penetration of his fangs was like the difference between cold burned beans and haute cuisine.

As a human, he’d had champagne tastes, and that had never changed. Still, freshies, even the best ones, the—he thought with a wince—tastiest ones, came and went. He’d always thought Serena had been right in what she’d told him in his earliest days as a vampire. There was no point in getting attached to something as fragile, as ephemeral, as mortal as a human. Not unless you were prepared to turn them. Problem was, the qualities that made a young woman a good freshie were often not what would make a good vampire.

Meanwhile, here he was, and here was Danger, doubtless waiting for some response from him. Probably expecting an explosion, or to be banished from his presence forever. Instead, he was having a hard time getting out of his thoughts and back into the here and now. It crossed his mind that he hadn’t always been one for introspection, but he seemed to be changing. Maybe even vampires grew up. He was still stalled on that, collecting his thoughts, when Danni broke the silence.

“It isn’t that I don’t care about you, Will,” she said. “You don’t—well, maybe you do know how much I care. But I—listen, I’ll understand if you want me out of here. That’s only fair. I’d appreciate it if I could just stay a day or two—just until I find somewhere else to crash.”

Will shook his head. “Don’t worry about it. As freshies go, you’re pretty low-maintenance, and I’d prefer Emma had some company. I don’t think we need to make any changes in our arrangements. Unless you—no, even if you—don’t wish to feed me anymore.” He looked down, then flicked his eyes back up to Danni’s face in a way that made her stomach do a slow forward roll at his blazing beauty. She knew she couldn’t offer him blood, not in her present condition, but she couldn’t look at him without wanting to make the move. And he knew it, and she knew he knew it. She actually twitched her wrist, fighting the urge to raise it to him. Despite everything he could sense, though, there were still unanswered questions. “Danger,” he asked quietly, “will you at least tell me why?”

Well, she thought, how do I put it? What would possibly make sense to this strange being watching her, listening to her heartbeats and the very slide of the blood through her veins. Maybe one question deserved another.

“Why did you ask me to be exclusive, Will? You never really said.”

“Didn’t I?” Will looked away. She wasn’t going to make this easy, was she? “I know,” he said carefully, “that I did a lot of damage—and not just to you—and it may sound strange, but I want to fix it, if I can. I know this is something all three of you wanted.”

Danni rolled her eyes. “Well. Gosh. That’s awfully sweet of you, Will. So you’re telling me that one of the most selfish, inconsiderate men—vamps—beings—I have ever known has suddenly decided to do this noble thing, make this incredible sacrifice, out of the sheer goodness of his heart. Humor the poor pathetic humans, pat the cows that give the milk. I’m touched. I’m so, so touched.”

Will blinked. “And what is the point you’re making by this? Are you trying to hurt me, or are you trying to make me hurt you?”

“I don’t know. Are you hurt? Good.”

There was no longer any question of sitting still. Will shoved himself out of his chair and began pacing. Danni felt like smacking her forehead. Stupid, she thought. You always have to poke the big scary predator with a sharp stick, don’t you?

“All right, fine, then, Danger, here it is. I asked you—and Emma—to feed me exclusively because I am selfish. I am monstrously selfish, and it finally, finally dawned on me that I couldn’t take watching you get used and maybe hurt by someone else.”

Danni closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She really wanted to scream at him, and she knew that wouldn’t help. When she’d regained a little control, she looked up to find him silently continuing his pacing. “So exactly who else has used me and hurt me, Will?” she asked. “Can you blame me for not wanting to put myself in a position where I have no one else to turn to? If I commit to exclusivity with you—and you leave again—then where am I? Lost. Just—just—lost.”

He stopped dead in his tracks, and the pain on his face shredded her. “I see,” he said, his voice toneless. “Once again I seem to have proven that I—that I—“

“Will,” she interrupted, “please. Just stop it. I never said that I didn’t care about you. You know that I do.”

He paused, then, returning to his seat. “So where do we go now?”

“I don’t know,” she replied. “I guess that’s kind of up to you.” Danni was getting tired. Even if she didn’t want to admit it to anyone, she was affected by her blood loss from the night before, and not at her best for having this kind of conversation. If I could just feed him some blood, she thought, we’d be back on the right path. If I could just—touch him, somehow.

Will nodded slowly. He knew he was feeling his way over delicate ground, and he was unaccustomed to the exercise. “I still want you, Danger,” he said. “I still want your blood, and I still want your—regard, I guess you’d say. But only willingly.”

Danni laughed, and they both felt the tension ease. “That’s not a problem,” she said, impulsively holding out a hand to him. It wasn’t the offer of a wrist, but just a hand. A gesture of affection and—regard, if that’s what he wanted to call it. “You know I’m always willing.”

Will took her hand, and found himself flowing forward to kneel with his arms around her. It crossed his mind that he’d held her so many times, but after he’d told her his true nature, he’d rarely kissed her. Not on the mouth. In fact, he realized with a start, it had been a kiss that had precipitated everything. Josef Kostan leaning over with his boundless ancient insolence to kiss Danger on the mouth right in front of him. Sliding a tongue on which her own blood still lingered into her again. A few precious minutes passed silently, then he raised a hand to her face and brushed the hair back from her forehead. “Danger,” he said in a voice just above a whisper, “do you trust me?”

She looked steadily in his eyes, seeing the glint of silver in the turquoise. “Yes, Will,” she said.

He put his mouth on hers, and as her lips opened sweetly to him, he sent up a fervent hope that he would be able to maintain the control he needed. As they kissed, her tongue grazed against the sharpness of his fang, and a few drops of blood flowed between them, a small commemoration of their bond. Will fell headfirst into the kiss, into the sound of her beating heart. There was a corner of his mind that still raged against her rejection, but with his mouth against hers, and the even the slight taste of her blood against his tongue, he couldn’t hold onto anything but the knowledge of her nearness. She smiled at him as he rose to go, and thought she saw more peace in his eyes than she had seen since his return.
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francis
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Re: 100% Freshie, Chapter 20 --PG-13

Post by francis »

Will is surely different now than he has been. I feel for him. Now he tries to convince himself that freshies are only food, but he seems to fail somewhat. He can’t shed the notion that humans have feelings, and that he is responsible for them.
Problem was, the qualities that made a young woman a good freshie were often not what would make a good vampire.
True word. But there seems to be exceptions from that rule.

Danny doesn’t give him a cop-out. I think she deserves his explanation more than he deserves hers.
She lashes out, but she is right: how can she trust him to not be abandoned again? Even if he cares about her, even if he isn’t as selfish maybe as he thinks he is.
And she gives him a gift, a gift of trust, even if it’s very breakable and only for that moment. I’m waiting to see where you take their relationship.
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