SB 16 - Relocating (Mick's POV) (PG-13) (the end)

[francis]

While I tried to get the silver tipped bullets out of Josef he came back to his snarky self, joking about me hurting him. He’d hurt me a lot more, but that was something blood wouldn’t be able to help with. Knowing that he still would be my friend and that it was his love for Sarah that made him do all those things was helping, though. It was something I could relate to. I would do anything for Beth, anything. But it irked me that he had never acknowledged Beth, calling her names and making fun of me for falling for her. He had always seemed to be opposed to romantic relationships with humans.

„All these years, Josef, you’re ranting how it could never work between us and humans.“

He stood up. „What happened to Sarah is proof that I’m right.“

I didn’t think so. What happened to her proved nothing, it was nobody’s fault. That he fell in love proved something to me. I told him that this changed a lot for me, that it made me think everything is possible.
He admitted that love changed people, that it could show you a part of yourself you never knew existed. But this was even more to me. I thought I had lost the ability to love, and the ability to love myself. I thought I had lost my soul, forever. But I hadn’t. Beth showed me that I was still alive, and capable of love, and maybe even worthy of being loved.

Seeing Josef so open and vulnerable in this room was quite a shock for me, I couldn’t keep my eyes off him, watching him watch Sarah with this face that was absolutely yearning, blissful and sad at the same time. It was so clearly visible here, but everywhere else he held on to this cold as ice persona, this stock broker without heart. I knew he was a softie on the inside, but I had underestimated his capability of being vulnerable.

What he said next made me look up. „I guess who I am is who I’m supposed to be.“ I looked at him, then at Sarah. How could he be so cool with the situation? He had 50 years to get there, but still. If Beth was in her place, I don’t know if I could stand it.

Maybe he was even more in tune with me than I thought, because he was talking about Beth next. „You gonna try and make the thing with Beth work?“ I exhaled. This was difficult. „I hope the universe is on your side.“ Well, I hoped that, too, but for starters I would never try to turn her.

Before we could explore this further, Beth came in. She had been sitting with Polly, maybe eating something. I didn’t want her to see the gruesome details of vampire maintenance.

She asked Josef if he was okay. He softly said: „I will be.“ Then he joked with her by giving an exaggerated complain about being staked. I sensed a new kind of connection between them. I couldn’t quite make out how she was feeling about all this. She was concerned about something, that much I could sense in her voice and her body language. She seemed sad, confused and somehow regretful. But she was bonding with Josef on a new level that wasn’t there before. She had seen him once or twice now, and had seen him from a side that even I didn’t see in 50 years. Maybe as a woman she could see still another side of this situation. I wanted to talk with her about Sarah, about Josef, and about what she thought about this. About us.

She asked Josef if he would come back to L.A. with us. He told her he was going to stay for a while. I guess he needed more time to come to terms with what happened. But he implied he would come back., and that made me happy. Not having lost my friend, and having found more of him than I would have thought possible, I suddenly felt some kind of new hope inside me. Hope that things would work out.

Beth gave him the diary. It seemed to me that she acted on behalf of Sarah. Could she relate to her so much? He took the small handwritten book and was immediately tearing up. I took this as our cue to leave, to give him some privacy. I touched Beth’s arm and we left the room. In the door I turned back to see if he would maybe say something more or tell us to stay. But he was lost to the world, on some memory lane, so I left him alone.

We took our coats and said goodbye to Polly, who told us she would soon be released and go home. It had been a hard day for her, too. Rushing down the stairs to the street I realized it was cold and already late. Beth came down behind me, and we walked a little. The fresh air was doing me a world of good. I had felt almost stifled by witnessing Josef’s emotion, it was so unusual to see him this way.

I was now able to focus on Beth. She seemed shaken. I asked if she was alright. She admitted that she was thinking about Sarah. Guess she wasn’t as focused on Josef’s heartbreak as I was, but on Sarah. Lying there, unmoving, almost dead, not able to die, that’s no life.
„She was so in love with him.“ she said and looked away, smiling.

I don’t really know what to say to that. I use the same commonplaces that you use when someone tells you their nephew had cancer or their uncle died in a car crash. „Yeah, it’s terrible“. How could I bring this conversation towards us now?

„Do you really think there is a cure?“ she asked.
What brought that on? Did she just change the topic, or was she in hope that a cure could help Sarah? Maybe it would.
I told her that I didn’t know much. Coraline made herself human, but what else did we really know? Thinking of Coraline made me realize that I had the chance of my life right before me to make things right, to win Beth’s heart. I didn’t want to live without her. Coraline had been my obsession, but I was free now. She had tricked me and had paid the price. I would deal with her when we got home. For this night, I wanted to live the moment. I had to smile about myself getting all worked up about this.
I called a taxi for us, then I invited her to spend a night on town, have some fun. I suggested some things, music, dinner, whatever. I just wanted to be with her and explore this feelings I hadn’t really acknowledged before. I felt like I could take on the world.

She smiled at me. She was so beautiful in the light of the street lamps, her hair was glistening, her eyes were shining.
But Beth was as always the voice of reason. „Our flight leaves in a couple of hours.“ Opening the door of the taxi for her I insisted. „So we take a later flight.“
Her face fell. She hesitated. „Look, I don’t know. I didn’t leave things very well with Josh. I do think I need to get home.“
That hurt. I had totally forgotten that she had a boyfriend. And I had the feeling she had forgotten that too, before, but now she rejected me and ran home to him. Convenient. Something was up. I swallowed hard.

She watched me and looked apologetic when she saw my dissappointment. „But I’ll drop you.“

I couldn’t stand it. How could I stay with her for one more moment? It would be awkward. I needed to get away. So I told her I would walk, and tried a little joke. But it came out bitter.

She climbed into the cab and I closed the door. Was everything lost? Did she reject me forever, or would she go home to properly break up with him. There was tension between them, I could see it from a mile, but still. She ran back to him.

I couldn’t help myself and layed my hand onto the window, seeking contact, seeking hope that this wasn’t the end. Since the fountain the barriers between us had been dropping, but now she had built them back up again. Was it fear? Had she seen too much of what vampires were capable of when she saw Sarah? Couldn’t she trust me that I wouldn’t do this to her?

She put her hand over my hand from the other side, and smiled. I smiled back. There was hope. She still was my friend. If I couldn’t have more I would have to make do with what I could have. Life was not about what I wanted. I took my hand away reluctantly and walked away.
I needed this night of solitude, to reaquaint myself with the feeling of being alone, isolated from the living. I had forgotten how to do this since Beth came into my life, but I would have to relearn. For her sake, and for mine. Because pining away for her when she clearly wasn’t interested would just make my life more miserable, and stalking her again was not an option.

At least I would have Josef back. Maybe I should threaten to kill him for making Beth reconsider living with a vampire. That would really be fun.

[mitzie]

This is a truly wonderful story! Your writing is absolutely amazing, francis!! You have gotten into their heads so well. You should have been a writer for the show!! I am always amazed at how you are so able to get into the heads of all of the characters! You are a truly great writer and I'm your "fan" for life!!!! *thud* *thud* *thud* *notworthy* *notworthy*

Love ya,
mitzie *hugs*

[francis]

Mitzie, thank you for reading and commenting on every single chapter. I appreciate your enthusiasm.

[Fleur de Lisa]

Sigh, the ending, when we all wanted Beth to get the hell out of that cab and run down the street with Mick!

Thanks for this wonderful take on SB. It's gratifying to be able to imagine the in-between parts of what was left unsaid.

Great job, francis!!

[francis]

Thank you so much, Fleur, for reading and commenting on every chapter.
I'm glad you liked it.

[Fleur de Lisa]

Enjoyed reading it again so much. Sometimes I think this stuff actually happens in the show! That is how well you write it.

I tend to get my fics mixed up with the show sometimes, and I wonder why they aren't showing certain scenes. Then the realization hits me that they were fics! Yeah, I have issues........

[francis]

Fleur, that's a huge compliment for a writer if I ever heard one.
I agree, there is stuff out there that I can picture while reading and I think I have seen the scene somewhere. Even for the after Sonata stuff, especially for that. I sometimes watch my DVD and wonder where Eris' Lucy is, or Catmoon's Shane, or Phoenix' Emma, or Librarian's Lucky. They become real after a while.
I am sure that there is a universe someplace where every fictional thing ever dreamed about is real. Some may be blurry, because they haven't been explored a lot, but some are very very real. Like Mick St. John.

[Fleur de Lisa]

You said it!

[bluedahlia3]

Just lovely Francis. I love the line "stalking her again was not an option." That about says it all doesn't it? Growth is always hard.

[francis]

Thank you, bluedahlia. They both will have to see where the future is going, but going back is not possible.

[moonshine]

Really great ending francis! You know what? I NEED MORE OF THIS!! I would love to know what Beth is thinking and what she does when she heads home! Have you considered doing another episode like this one? Anyway the idea was brilliant and you wrote it very well!!
I loved it very much

[jen]

Absolutely lovely. I agree with posts saying that they want more of this. Me, too!

I'd really like to see Mick and Beth on that date in New York. Take that later flight. Go out to dinner. A steak for the lady and listen to some jazz.

Do something 'New York'

Wonderful story.

Thank you!

[francis]

Thank you, moonshine and jen!
For now, I don't plan on a sequel of sorts. I have to finish ToF and have a hard time with that one. Haven't written a word in months. Sorry.

[helloeeze]

I love all these SB stories! Of course, this scene is the pinnacle of Mick/Beth-ness for me. All Mick's thoughts ring so true. Amid his sadness, Mick always seems to find a little humor to get him through. Yeah, that's Mick.

[francis]

Thank you, helloeeze. That scene at the taxi is one of my favorite moments, because it's so sad.