A Year-Long Love Letter (PG-13) - complete 7/5

[redwinter101]

alle, just remember that Mick and Beth are reunited- so the torment does come to an end.

seamus, thank you - and yes, deafening. Poor Mick.

MLC,

they all sound just like Mick

That's just marvellous - thanks so much.

coco, re the silence - absolutely. At one time, it would have been his comfort zone, but now it's just torture.

francis, thank you.

Red

[redwinter101]

This takes place between chapters 7 and 8

Day 99


Happy Birthday, Beth, my love.

Your first birthday as my wife and I hate that we couldn't spend it together. I wonder how you're feeling - I hope you've had a happy day and friends to share it with. You can tell me all about it when we see each other.

I had a celebration of my own - I couldn't let this special day go unmarked. So I spent tonight down on the beach at Santa Monica. I love it there. It always feels safe. Apart from a couple of dog-walkers I was alone. Almost. I felt you there with me, holding my hand as I walked along the shore. It was beautiful. In the quiet moments, I imagine that you can feel me too. I hope so. I thought of all the birthdays we'll spend together in the future, even mine, which I've long since stopped celebrating. It's never been something I wanted to mark but now I think maybe it's time to celebrate being alive for another year.

I bet that at some point today you've thought about what another year passed means for us. You're a year older and I'm not, not really, not physically, and I know that weighs on your mind. Don't let it, not today. This is the day to celebrate life - the day you came into this world. How can that be anything but a day of joy?

We weren't together, but it's been a good day. Even Josef sends his birthday wishes - he rolled his eyes a bit, but he raised a glass to you anyway.

I love you.

M

[redwinter101]

This takes place between chapters 7 and 8

Day 100


B,

I had the most wonderful dream.

We were together, here at home, just a normal evening, talking about the day, watching an old movie on TV. I could feel you curled up against me and when you laughed I swear I felt it ripple through me. You were wearing that old varsity t-shirt I always tease you about and your hair was still damp from the shower. God you smelled amazing.

We went to bed and made love. I could feel you - your skin, so soft and warm under my fingers, your beautiful body moving against me, needing me as much as I need you. The taste of your blood, the taste of life, my life. I never thought I would feel that way. I always thought blood would divide us, but you've shown me another way. We were so close, so connected - it was beautiful and sexy and intimate. I've never felt as close to anyone as I do to you, even now when you're so far away.

When I woke up, for a few moments I forgot. The dream was so real I thought you were still here and I reached out for you. My freezer never felt so cold as it did at that moment.

It won't be long until our home is filled with love and laughter again. That's what keeps me going. You keep me going.

I love you. I miss you. I want you. I need you.

M

[redwinter101]

As well as 2 more letters posted today, I've added an index to the first post in this thread, as requested.

Red

[Moonlightsonata]

Thank you for these letters. I can really feel the love in them. How wonderful to have someone love you like that. So sad they are apart. The romance of Mick and Beth is a lot of what captured my heart about Moonlight. Again thank you.

[wpgrace]

Ah! Well the first one... just think... he's likely spent alllllll her birthdays celebrating alone. He would never have expected to have spent THIS particular one that way, but I bet there was something familiar, comfortable, about celebrating Beth's birthday by going down to the beach at Santa Monica... I bet he's done that before on her birthday... maybe several birthdays....

And then that second one. Jeezuz. He's not desperate or crazy... just wanting. That last line is the line every woman would love to get... and the whole feel of this letter is a bit different. It's almost like he wrote this one still warm in the feelings of the dream... he's still under the influence of it...

Just beautiful. The both of em... these are truly an amazing project of yours, redwinter... You are doing us all a huge favor bothering to go back and write these letters... but let me tell you, they actually DO add to the enjoyment of the whole piece. You gave us marvelous snippets in the chapters, but to get to read the whole letters instead of just the snippets... pure pleasure.

[lynnrxgal]

Mick and Beth's love for one another WAS the magic that was Moonlight! And these letters from Mick (the man of few words) open him up to us. I love this!

I wonder if Beth wrote any letters or in a journal....

[kpyle]

These letters are just beautiful and full of so much love! I know there is heartache as well, but the love is what shines through! Thank you for adding them to this wonderful story! I also wonder as Lynnrxgal has posed a good question about weather Beth wrote any letters or kept a journal through all of this. I would love to know what she would have written. Thanks for this wonderful look into Mick's feelings, and to him letting his walls down even more were Beth is concerned!

Kelly

[redwinter101]

Moonlightsonata, how wonderful indeed. Thank you.

Thanks Grace. I love your take on the birthdays - that would make a lot of sense. Oh he makes me sigh. I'm glad you're enjoying the letters - truth be told, they were already written (I wrote them for myself as I was writing Afterglow) - they just needed a bit of spit and polish - hence why they're going up so fast.

lynnrxgal, LOL! Are you trying to kill me, woman? In this story, Beth didn't keep a journal and only wrote Mick one letter - and that's already been posted in its entirety in chapter 8 (but I'll repost it here when I get to that point).

Kelly, oh it's my pleasure - I'm so happy you're enjoying them.

Red

[mitzie]

I love these letters!! If Mick hadn't written a letter each day he might have lost his perspective and motivations for living. Beautifully written and true Mick!!!!


mitzie

[Moonlighter]

These 2 letters were just wonderful, Red. Mick missing Beth's first birthday as a married couple -- so heartbreaking since, as Grace pointed out, he has already missed so many over the years. And touching on her worry of growing older while he doesn't -- well, there's a way to fix that, but that's for later...

The dream -- oh my gosh. I can imagine he just wanted to smash a fist through his freezer when he realized it was a dream. That last line -- yeah, what woman wouldn't want to read/hear that???

ML s Red more and more every day for posting these!

[allegrita]

Oh... What bittersweet, yearning, loving, beautiful letters. Mick's love pours out of these, dear Red... his feeling of connectedness to Beth and simultaneously his longing to actually be in her presence.

What beautiful accompaniments these are to the story. They are like the illuminations in a Medieval manuscript--they give us such vivid, detailed glimpses into Mick's psyche, and also into the way he makes it through each day without Beth.

I do love to picture him walking on the beach and imagining Beth's hand in his. And I agree that he's probably celebrated many of Beth's birthdays alone, lost in thought, thinking about her. So this feels like familiar territory to me... although of course it's not familiar at all...not really.

It's the love that sustains him. And every letter is another day passed...watching them pile up helps him get through the seemingly endless time until they can be together again.

[coco]

I agree with Grace about the birthday letter. You kind of feel like he would have spent all her birthdays alone thinking about her in some way but this should have been the one birthday when he wouldn't have had to do that. It's so bittersweet that he is once again alone on her birthday. I love the idea of him down at the beach and feeling Beth with him. *sigh*

The dream letter is a man missing his wife so terribly. The want he feels for her leaps off the page in this letter. I can certainly imagine how cold and confined that freezer must have felt after the realisation that it was just a dream.

I love you. I miss you. I want you. I need you.

That last line is just beautiful. Everyone wants someone to write them a letter with those words in it.

Gorgeous Red.

[lorig]

Just beautiful. How sad it is that he felt so alone on her birthday. His need, his want and his love for jumped off the page. *sigh*. These letters are almost as beautiful as my mother's day card that sings "Your Unbelievable" (from the kids so it is priceless) . Well done Red!

[Lupine]

Not even a third of the way through their year of enforced separation and still Mick feels the loss of Beth so strongly, so constantly. It is amazing that he didn't verge into total despair.

So sad for them to be separated on Beth's birthday, but what a change that Mick can acknowledge to himself that now, after all these years he's ready to start celebrating his birthday again. What must Beth think as she reads this and knows she is the reason? What a responsibility that is to another person, to be that important and central to their very being.

And Mick acknowledges the difference in their life spans. That must have been particularly hard for him now when the limited time they have together (if she stays human) is made even shorter by this year apart.

These letters, all of them are brilliant, and I love them. After having written them, and having Beth read them I imagine that it will be easier to Mick to be open about his feelings once they are together again.