Eternity -- Isn't That a Cologne? PG13

A place for Cat Moon's G to PG-13 stories

Eternity -- Isn't That a Cologne? PG13

Postby Catmoon » Tue Feb 17, 2009 1:39 pm

Note: I just realized I've been sleeping on the job and haven't posted this Francis request story yet. So here it is.

This is a parody, folks. I've found some people like it, some find it disturbing. It's just my sick sense of humor, inspired by Fleur De Lis, and a certain interview... WARNING: use caution when consuming liquid beverages. Author not responsible for keyboards or other computer equipment damaged. ;)

Title: Eternity -- Isn't That A Cologne?
Author: Cat Moon
Rating: PG13 I guess, a bit of language
Genre: PARODY
Timeline/Spoiler: Fleur De Lis again
Disclaimer: ML characters don't belong to me, I have no money, I make no profit.
Summary: Poor Shakespeare


Eternity, isn’t that a cologne?
By Cat Moon

“To me the unrequited love aspect of this show and the ROMEO AND JULIET mirror that we provide is an essential part of the drama and the tension. In Mick’s mind there is no way he could ever cross that line despite the flesh being weak and despite the depth of feeling that he has for this woman. In his mind that would be the ultimate sin. Re-read ROMEO AND JULIET and see if you don’t cry when they kill themselves at the end. I’m not saying what we are dealing with is comparable to Shakespeare. “ [Laughs]

--Alex O’Loughlin, iF magazine interview. 11/20/07 (paraphrased)



***

Mickbeth sit together on the couch in his apartment. The lights are low and twilight is fading into Moonlight. They both hold identical glasses of amber liquid, about a quarter full.

“How long…” Beth inquires, looking at the glass nervously.

“It’s fast acting poison,” he assures her. “And it’ll be as painless as possible.”

“Good, good.” She nods. “Then we’ll never again have to worry about that bitch Morgaline stalking us through the decades. We’ll be free of her forever, and she won’t have the satisfaction of mindfucking us anymore.”

Mick nods, relieved. “And I won’t have to suffer through the unbearable agony of watching you die a shriveled up ninety year old prune that I haven’t had sex with in forty years anyway, or have to face the unspeakable sin of turning you into a monster like me.”

“No, my darling. This is the only way for us to truly be together and happy for eternity. No one will ever again be able to tear us apart again.”

“Not even us,” he responds. “Are you ready?”

She takes a deep breath and nods resolutely. “I love you, Mick St. John.”

“And I love you too, Beth Turner. Always.”

They raise their glasses and toast each other. “On three?” Mick asks.

“On three.” Beth answers.

“One. Two. Three!”

They both down the liquid in one quick gulp. Then they sit back to wait the short amount of time for the end to come.

Mick sits up abruptly, making an 'oops' expression. “Wait a second – I’m a vampire. This poison’s not gonna kill me.”

Beth stares at him incredulously, trying to take in air that is becoming harder to get as her lungs slowly stop working.

“My bad.”

Glaring at him murderously, Beth grabs a fist full of his shirt and hauls him down to her, nose to nose. “You better turn me RIGHT NOW, you bastard!” she growls.

“Well, so much for peaceful eternity,” Mick says, as he sinks his fangs into Beth’s neck.


The end.
11/24/07
Click here for link to my HB series story index

Image
"I do whatever the Josef-muse tells me to do."
User avatar
Catmoon
Rogue vampire
 
Posts: 1224
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 10:13 am
Location: "On the road, somewhere between L.A. and Oslo"

Re: Eternity -- Isn't That a Cologne? PG13

Postby francis » Tue Feb 17, 2009 1:48 pm

Bwahahahahaha!!!
Priceless, Catmoon.
Of course, suicide is such a serious topic, but as Shakespeare and others deal with it in literature, it's bound to be parodied sometimes.
I love how Mick goes all "upps" and Beth takes charge. And as Beth is a smart woman, maybe that was her plan all the time??? Wouldn't surprise me.
This gave me a chuckle again.
Thank you.

Next request? Really? How about "Delicate Flower"? Short but sweet.
User avatar
francis
100% Moonlightaholic
 
Posts: 11473
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 9:45 am

Re: Eternity -- Isn't That a Cologne? PG13

Postby NocturneInCMoll » Tue May 26, 2009 4:40 am

"Oops!" :snicker:

:rolling:
NocturneInCMoll
Logan's WoW nemesis
 
Posts: 987
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 8:27 pm
Location: British Columbia

Re: Eternity -- Isn't That a Cologne? PG13

Postby seamus3333 » Tue May 26, 2009 3:57 pm

Oh my..this one's even funnier! So glad I found you!
Image
User avatar
seamus3333
Freelance freshie
 
Posts: 207
Joined: Mon Feb 16, 2009 10:51 pm

Re: Eternity -- Isn't That a Cologne? PG13

Postby AggieVamp » Wed May 27, 2009 4:44 am

:rolling: :rolling: :rolling: :rolling:
This is great! And as I read it I was going 'wait a minute....he's a vamp - poison won't...' OOPS!

:giggle:

Karen
Image
Banner by HotMicks

Growing Old is Mandatory, Growing Up is Optional - and I Opt NOT to Grow Up!
:petcat: :petcat:
User avatar
AggieVamp
Rogue vampire
 
Posts: 1497
Joined: Sun Jan 18, 2009 2:26 am
Location: Central Texas

Re: Eternity -- Isn't That a Cologne? PG13

Postby mitzie » Wed May 27, 2009 4:53 am

Love it!!!! :yahoo: :yahoo: :coffee: :rolling: :clapping: :clapping: :biggrin: :whistle: :mdrama: :getclue: :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo: :cheer: :cheer: :cheering: :hyper2: :clapping: :clapping: :thud: :thud: :coffee: :notworthy: :hyper2: :hyper2:


mitzie :mooncat:
mitzie
Courtesan
 
Posts: 2911
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 1:39 am
Location: Somewhere in Moonlight land...

Re: Eternity -- Isn't That a Cologne? PG13

Postby Catmoon » Wed May 27, 2009 10:31 am

Thanks to all for reading and letting me know that you got a kick out of the story. :thanks:
Click here for link to my HB series story index

Image
"I do whatever the Josef-muse tells me to do."
User avatar
Catmoon
Rogue vampire
 
Posts: 1224
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 10:13 am
Location: "On the road, somewhere between L.A. and Oslo"

Re: Eternity -- Isn't That a Cologne? PG13

Postby jen » Thu Jan 27, 2011 1:15 am

This was hilarious :rolling:

With the same logic that prefers dramatic over sanity.

Nicely done!

Thank you!

Jenna

:hearts: :flowers: :hearts: :flowers:
Mick and Beth--two of the lovely faces of Moonlight
Image
Beautiful banner by the Fabulous Phoenix
jen
Cleaner
 
Posts: 6412
Joined: Mon Apr 20, 2009 12:11 am

Re: Eternity -- Isn't That a Cologne? PG13

Postby maggatha3 » Thu Feb 17, 2011 12:14 am

:rolling: :rolling: :rolling:
I am still laughing, cannot stop laughing, and have tears in my eyes...from laughing..and find it difficult to type...

ooops, can't die, can't die :rolling:
:clapping: :clapping: thanks, I haven't laughed that much since... don't know when :yahoo:

off for a re-read :hearts:
-It never ends well...
-Never?

Image

Gorgeous avatar by out talented Lilly .
Banner by the amazing friend Hot Micks!!! .
User avatar
maggatha3
Ancient
 
Posts: 4843
Joined: Thu Jan 13, 2011 8:06 am
Location: Βack to Greece....

Re: Eternity -- Isn't That a Cologne? PG13

Postby maggatha3 » Fri Jun 24, 2016 3:52 pm

:rolling: :rolling: Priceless!!!
-It never ends well...
-Never?

Image

Gorgeous avatar by out talented Lilly .
Banner by the amazing friend Hot Micks!!! .
User avatar
maggatha3
Ancient
 
Posts: 4843
Joined: Thu Jan 13, 2011 8:06 am
Location: Βack to Greece....

Re: Eternity -- Isn't That a Cologne? PG13

Postby allegrita » Fri Jun 24, 2016 5:36 pm

I can't believe I never commented on this story here! It's always given me a chuckle. Ooooops. :blushing: :slaphead:
:rolling: :rolling: :rolling: :rolling: :rolling:
Image
Support journalism.
User avatar
allegrita
Moonlightaholic Admin
 
Posts: 41977
Joined: Sat Jan 17, 2009 9:22 am
Location: Snuggled under the brown afghan, watching the fire


Return to Cat Moon's Office

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests

cron