Drabbles -- up to PG-13

[starbucksjunkie]

PG-13; mild language
Moonlight and its characters are the sole property of someone else. I own original characters and my plots.

100 word challenge


Train Time

In the war, after death had come for us, we’d wake up in bed. Pain, anguish, despair covered us better than the thin hospital blankets.

Sally would come with the tray that carried us out of there. Morphine, Methadone. “Train time,” Ernie’d say. The locomotive would glide into our veins, and we’d ride, sated, self-contained, replete. Sleep would finally come. Nothing to need. Nothing to regret.

Sometimes Sally was late. Guys would shake, cry, piss themselves. Curse her. Then she’d come. “Oh, train time,” Ernie would moan.

The elevator door opens. I inhale. Her.

It’s train time.

[redwinter101]

sbj, I read so many drabbles that just miss the point. They are just 100 words that tell a bit of a story.

This is everything a drabble should be - 100 words that tell the whole story. God, what a final two lines. I loved this - it captures Mick's need, his love, his dependence.

Beautiful.

Red

[Fleur de Lisa]

Wow. That was amazing.

I have to agree with red. Talk about using your 100 words to maximum effect.

That was beautiful. Beth is his drug of choice, and your writing is ours.

[coco]

Fantastic sbj

[francis]

Amazing. You take a cruel and chilling war memory of Mick, and turn it into a tale of salvation and comfort. Beth is Mick's drug of choice.
Sooo good.

[mitzie]

Wonderful drabble! I went through so many different emotions while reading this one. Very powerful!! Bravo!!!!

mitzie

[Shadow]

This is just astonishing. Every word is perfect. How did you get a novel's worth of story in there? The analogy is exquisite, and so completely original. Beautiful!

[AussieJo]

Nikki, you pack a punch so well.
It's fabulous to have you back
It's "train time.".....

[Raven]

This is phenomenal sbj...phenomenal.
My father was steam burned from head to toe in WW2. The morphine train and subsequent euphoric stupor was the only thing that mattered.
So few words...volumes spoken.

[nutmegger911]

Interesting. Well done. The dichotomy is striking.

[starbucksjunkie]

Thank you, everyone.

Raven, I'm sorry about your dad. My dad flew P-47s, and he had his own scars, mostly on the inside.