Suffer Not Silently (Champagne Challenge #103) PG13

[PNWgal]

A/N: Excuse the completely STUPID title. It's the best I could come up with on the fly.

My answer to the latest challenge - raw and unbeta'ed, so I hope I caught all the obvious errors.


Usual disclaimers are in place.


SUFFER NOT SILENTLY


"I'm a vampire."

Shocked, Beth looked down at a cowering Mick. She took it all in; the fangs, the blood drying on his chin, the icy blue eyes full of fear, pain and shame.

"That's...that's not possible. There's no such thing as vampires." Even as the words left her lips, her eyes gave her the full truth. Mick turned his head away from her questioning gaze and pulled his knees against his chest, a death grip on the blood bag in his hand. He could deal with the shock she certainly was feeling, but he didn't think he could bear to watch those blue eyes turn dark with horror and derision.

He'd never intended her to see the monster inside him. Hell, he'd never intended her to see him at all, but that night at the fountain, he hadn't been able to resist. The part that kept him on the fringes of her life had lost the battle against the part that needed her to notice him. She'd been so beautiful, so brave wading through that cold water and everything inside him longed for him to matter to her, just a little.

When Beth knelt beside him and laid a gentle hand on his shoulder, Mick jerked back from her touch.

"Don't touch me...please," he begged. "Just go."

"I'm not leaving you like this. I want to help you."

Then leave me. Leave me and never come back. The longer you stay, the harder it will be to let you go.

Don't look at her again. If you don't look, you won't see how much she loathes you now. Don't look, don't look...oh god...

He couldn't help but steal a glance at her face. He was terrified of what he might see there, but he had to know. He closed his eyes and fought back tears when instead of the disgust he expected, all he saw and sensed was concern. For him.

He marvelled at her strength and knew he was unworthy of it.

When the warmth of her hand left his shoulder, Mick sagged in relief. Thank God. She was finally listening to something he said and would leave him to his suffering. He relaxed slightly, dropping his head on his bent knees. The minute amount of blood he'd gotten down before Beth had burst into his apartment was swimming in greasy circles in his gut. He gagged as he fought to keep it down - throwing up in front of Beth would just be the icing on the top of his humiliation cake.

His number one priority was getting the silver out of his system. He would have to call Josef - there was no way he would be able to get to the silver buckshot in his shoulder and it couldn't stay in his body. He'd gotten enough blood from Guillermo to help him heal, but the silver would poison him slowly if it remained where it was. All he had to do now was reach in his coat pocket and pull out his phone to call Josef. He'd have to move quickly; already the silver was taking its toll, snaking its destruction through his veins.

He groaned as his bad shoulder screamed in protest with his attempt to get to his pocket, then froze as Beth's scent drifted into his nostrils.

Oh god...she hadn't left. She was back, kneeling in front of him this time.

"Mick? Can you look at me?"

He was helpless to ignore her plea. His head weighed half a ton as he slowly lifted it to meet her gaze. He was confused as her hand travelled towards him until he saw what she held. A washcloth.

He shuddered at the simple kindness and his tears fell unchecked as she gently cleaned the dried blood from his face. He'd denied himself for so long - now all he wanted was to wrap himself around her and absorb her warmth. Unbidden, the memory of holding her in his arms came to him. She'd fit against him like she was the missing piece of his puzzle and, starved for affection and contact, he had gathered her against him.

"Beth..."

"Shh," she murmured. "Let me do this for you. Let me help you."

Too soon she was done and she set the bloody rag aside.

"What can I do for you?"

Mick gave up. "I need to get the silver out of me. It's poisonous for vam...for me," he added when her brow creased. "I'm going to need help getting it out. Can you get my phone out of my pocket?"

The smell of her invaded his senses as she leaned over him and started going through his pockets. When she inadvertently brushed a breast against his arm, they both tensed and Beth flushed.

"Ah, here...here it is," she stammered as she handed him the phone and sat back on her heels. Mick fumbled through the numbers until he came to Josef's.

Josef's irritated voice came over the line. "This better be good, my friend. You're interrupting dinner."

Mick's vision blurred. "Josef...I'm...need your help. I've been shot."

Josef's voice instantly sobered. "Silver?"

"Yeah. Buckshot."

"Where?"

"Shoulder. Can't reach it."

"I'm on the way." Josef was gone with a "click" and Mick sighed in relief, then struggled to focus on Beth.

"Beth, you have to leave NOW. If Josef finds you here..."

"Who's Josef?" The reporter in Beth sat up and took notice. "Another vampire? Are there-"

"BETH." Mick raised his voice, then felt like hell when Beth flinched. "No questions now, ok?" He needed to get her out of his apartment before Josef arrived. He would be furious enough when he found out that a human had found out about their kind. The fact that Beth was a reporter would send the old man into a fit of apoplexy and he wouldn't hesitate to take steps to silence the threat. In his condition, there was no way he'd be able to keep Beth safe; even if he was in top form, he wouldn't be a match for Josef's age and strength. Josef wouldn't take kindly to Mick taking sides against the Community with a human in any case and Mick had no desire to force Josef to make the decision to have him eliminated.

He braced himself against the wall and tried to stand. Beth got to her feet quickly.

"Here..." She helped him to his feet, careful not to jostle his injured shoulder. She staggered when Mick slumped against her as they made their careful way to the sofa. Exhausted, Mick collapsed against the leather.

Beth shifted from foot to foot, unsure of what to do next. "Are...are you ok? Do you want to take off your coat? I can help..."

Mick shook his head. "Beth, please. You have to leave right now."

Beth was dubious. "I really don't want to leave you like this, Mick."

He mustered up a wan smile and silently urged her to leave. Josef would be here any minute. "I'll be alright."

"Ok..." Beth buttoned up her coat and turned to grab her bag from the floor where she had dropped it. She turned when Mick whispered her name, her face expectant.

"Thank you for..." Mick's tongue tripped over what his heart wanted to divulge. He wanted to thank her for caring for him, for not turning away from him in horror, for her quiet acceptance of what he was. "Thank you."

Beth smiled and laid a hand on his cheek. "You're welcome. I hope you're better soon." With a final look, she slipped through the door.

As he waited for salvation, he wondered at this slip of a human. She hadn't flinched when she found out what he truly was, she had simply assessed the situation and taken care of him the best she could. He wondered if he'd see her again.

It was best for her if she never came back. It would kill him if she didn't.

Mick gritted his teeth and prayed Josef would hurry.

[coco]

PNW that was just wonderful and totally a scene I could see played out on screen.

I just adore this line so much. Perfect Mick/Beth moment:

He shuddered at the simple kindness and his tears fell unchecked as she gently cleaned the dried blood from his face. He'd denied himself for so long - now all he wanted was to wrap himself around her and absorb her warmth. Unbidden, the memory of holding her in his arms came to him. She'd fit against him like she was the missing piece of his puzzle and, starved for affection and contact, he had gathered her against him.

And this just brought a smile to my face

"Thank you for..." Mick's tongue tripped over what his heart wanted to divulge. He wanted to thank her for caring for him, for not turning away from him in horror, for her quiet acceptance of what he was. "Thank you."

Beth smiled and laid a hand on his cheek. "You're welcome. I hope you're better soon." With a final look, she slipped through the door.

Just lovely PNW

[lunalux]

Loved that she washed his face...you've gotta know that Beth Turner didn't just leave...and Josef better hurry but not too much. Beth still has to get out of the building!...

Well done!...I really enjoyed this. Thanks for posting, PNWgal.

[redwinter101]

*chucks story in the bin*

This is just so lovely, PNW. I hesitate to say perfect, because I'm sure some of the other writers will come up with something wonderful, but, that's what my first reaction was. This scene was the moment when I really fell in love with Moonlight and it has a special place in my heart. You've provided a conclusion that gives it the ending I would have loved to have seen.

Mick's dread is palpable and painful; Beth's care for him is tentative and touching - just as it should be.

With this,

everything inside him longed for him to matter to her, just a little.

and this,

"Don't touch me...please," he begged. "Just go."

the tears that first sprang to my eyes at "Please leave" are back, fresh and strong.

And then you just go and give my heart another squeeze:

He closed his eyes and fought back tears when instead of the disgust he expected, all he saw and sensed was concern. For him.

Your descriptions of Mick's declining physical state, his heavy head, his nausea, create such a strong visual. Amazing.

But, Mick's hurt not dead and in addition to his emotional reaction to her, there is a powerful physical one:

He shuddered at the simple kindness and his tears fell unchecked as she gently cleaned the dried blood from his face. He'd denied himself for so long - now all he wanted was to wrap himself around her and absorb her warmth. Unbidden, the memory of holding her in his arms came to him.

and it isn't just Mick who feels it.

The smell of her invaded his senses as she leaned over him and started going through his pockets. When she inadvertently brushed a breast against his arm, they both tensed and Beth flushed.

That's the moment; any chance of them staying apart disappears right there and then.

"Thank you for..." Mick's tongue tripped over what his heart wanted to divulge. He wanted to thank her for caring for him, for not turning away from him in horror, for her quiet acceptance of what he was. "Thank you."

There was always more unsaid than spoken aloud with these two - and this is a perfect example of that.

The ending shows us the conflict that is the driving force behind the whole damn series:

It was best for her if she never came back. It would kill him if she didn't.

God this is good.

Red

[Raven]

You got it!!! That's exactly how it happened. It feels perfect...in my head...perfect! PNWgal, the words, the feel of it...Mick's thoughts, emotions, constant worry about Beth...how he got the blood and Josef to help and Beth to safety...I love this!

And I love this...

She'd been so beautiful, so brave wading through that cold water and everything inside him longed for him to matter to her, just a little.

And this...

"Don't touch me...please," he begged. "Just go."
"I'm not leaving you like this. I want to help you."
Then leave me. Leave me and never come back. The longer you stay, the harder it will be to let you go.

And this...

Don't look at her again. If you don't look, you won't see how much she loathes you now. Don't look, don't look...oh god...
He couldn't help but steal a glance at her face.

And all of it...I might as well quote the whole thing. Consider the whole thing quoted in my post.
Fantastic. You should think about ditching the beta for a while (only kidding, betas) because you hit a friggin' betaless homerun!

[one.zebra]

PNW, hold on a sec., got a little problem to take care of first.../scruffle, scratch,shuffle....aha! pulls Red's story from 'bin' ..(silly foreigners)/

Red?
Me and my band of fanfic readers will not tolerate you tossing your stories like this!

Each WONDERFUL writer has their OWN style, unique to you...so no more of this..the breadth, dept and diversity of talent we have here is what we LOVE so much...
OK, /wipes hands/..

.. now PNW...this is gorgeous writing...poor Mick, good hearted Beth...they're both gonners at this moment..beautiful, heart squeezing, poignant..and Josef, you've just gotta love him...snark, then drops everything to get to his best friend as fast as possible.

So satisfying on every level..Thank You!

Mary

[Luxe de Luxe]

Now this is what Beth should have done...

"I'm not leaving you like this. I want to help you."

..instead of standing around gawking like an idiot.

You've really captured Mick's dilemma here. Our glimpse into his thought processes were exactly how I imagined they would have been. Sigh. We all really loved Mick at that moment.

Loved this line,

- throwing up in front of Beth would just be the icing on the top of his humiliation cake.

and this,

It was best for her if she never came back. It would kill him if she didn't.

Now that, is a truly great line.

Well done PNWgal. ..and BTW, I like the angsty title, it sort of fits with Mick's feelings at this point in time.

[Fleur de Lisa]

Glorious.

It was best for her if she never came back. It would kill him if she didn't.

That line encapsulates the entire fic, the series. Them.

Mick's suffering due to the silver in his system is minute compared to the inner struggle he is waging over Beth and his feelings regarding her. This is what did play through his mind while this scene occured. Without a doubt. And Beth, so strong--not caring that this man, who she barely knows, reveals to her that he is some sort of supernatural figment of most people's imagination. The proof of the strength of their feelings is beautifully provided by your wondrous words. For if he really wanted to, he could have made her leave immediately. If she was really frightened and repulsed by him, she would have.

Neither moved. And therein lies our lovely story.

Glorious.

for this fic, your past ones, and those to come

[jenstc2003]

Just amazingly well done PNW!!! I loved it!

[darkstarrising]

*chucks story in the bin next to Red's*

Jen,

you've nailed this, perfectly. This is what should have happened, this is what she would have done. She was already drawn to him and he had saved her from the grad student, so how could she possibly walk away?

She leaves briefly, only to return with a washcloth, something so many have done for their children when they've cut themselves. I think that's a part of what she's doing....but she's also removing the blood, to return his face to a form that she can deal with, that she already loves.

But his emotions - his humiliation, his shame, his hope -

It was best for her if she never came back. It would kill him if she didn't.

I don't know how you'd improve on this.....

Beautiful, absolutely beautiful

[lynnrxgal]

Magnificent! Plain and simple! That scene at the end of 2 tore my heart in two and this filled in the gaps and made it whole again.

[wpgrace]

OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH this is incredddddddibly satisfying.

And you were way brave to go first... but this is gonna be hard to beat... you got it, sweetie. This is the Beth we wanted to see, the Beth that she sometimes was. And this the Mick that lurked inside, the one we didn't see that often but we surely did see him in this scene in the show. Nice for you to bring the two together for us!

[cassysj]

That was really extraordinary. I could completely see this as I was reading it.

Just wonderful. I don't have better words to describe this story.

[PNWgal]

*bows*

You all are too kind. I thank you.

coco, thank you. I think Mick underestimated Beth's strength and he's a man of few words. He'd fight not to let her know how he felt so that she'd stay away.

Thanks for reading, lunalux...and I think Beth got away in time

Red..."thank you" just doesn't seem adequate for such praise - but thank you. So much. This moment is when I fell in love with Mick and Moonlight and I would have loved to see this take place. Beth may have been afraid of Mick, but never disgusted or horrified. How humbling for Mick, since he was so convinced he was a monster. Beth's proved otherwise. These two were meant to be.

Raven, you're going to make me blush - thank you so much! And...I think my betas would beg to differ with you.

OZ, thank you...and I agree. I'm just waiting anxiously for Red's one-shot because I KNOW it's going to be beautiful. And that's how I see Josef - cool, snarky, ruthless...and willing to do anything for Mick.

Agreed, Luxe - this is how I would hope Beth would respond, because I see her as being that strong. And thanks for the thumbs-up on the title..I was afraid it would be too "tortured writer"ish.

Thank you, Lisa...and I think you're right. Either one of them could have walked away and neither wanted to. Beth's strong and Mick needs that, whether he wants to admit it or not.

Thanks for the kudos, jen!

DSR, I swear you find things in my stuff that I never even knew I was putting in there (that comment about Beth cleaning the blood off Mick's face). Thank you so much!

lynnrxgal, I'm glad I could "fill in the blanks" for you. Thank you.

Grace, thank you. I didn't mind being first - this story's been brewing in my brain since the challenge was first talked about. This was Mick and Beth at their finest and I would have LOVED to see this.

I'm glad this worked for you, cassy...thank you.

[mitzie]

Excellent story! The self-loathing Mick and acceptance and concern from Beth. Yeah, very realistic!!

mitzie